I feel like if I have kids I might slow down, I dont want my kids to see my main hobby is vidya growing up, I'd prefer them to believe in something else, maybe I'll pretend I like golf so they think I'm ore outdoorsy than I am. That being said idk if I even want kids anymore, I'm a support worker and I like my job/paid pretty well but being a parent today seems like an uphill battle without a support network or social circle and that's for the normal kids, I've worked with *extremely* low functioning people and I'm not sure I could handle the gamble of having a kid. Will you get a 'normal one, will you get one who is textbook stereotypical autism (trains, dinosaurs, minecraft, sonic) who screams when things aren't "right", will you get a little monster who intentionally pisses off her siblings and/or fling her shit at them, or will you get an extremely low functioning non-verbal down syndrome child who is now 20 years old and the only aspirations left is the hope one day he'll maybe stop hitting women and children and maybe even stop shitting himself?

I can't help but think about if I became of the parents I help after doing support work, I do not envy their position.