I'm watching this video of turtles having sex:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UxoK5bRWSro

and it's clear that while the guy is LOVING it and clearly having the best orgasm of his life the woman doesn't care at all

and if you look at our society it's clear that women aren't motivated by sex at all. they want so many other things out of a relationship than sex.

so I have to ask, do they basically not really give a shit about sex at all?

No.