Pic unrelated to story. It's from a separate roadtrip through Death Valley in 2016. The Eureka Dunes are based, amazingly desolate and yet there are still tracks of insects and snakes all over the place.

I got a job in Death Valley National Park just prior to the Big Coof. It sucked. Everyone was a medicated zombie. Management was a complete clusterfuck, but because everyone was a medicated zombie, nobody cared about anything. I would take edibles and walk naked out in the desert behind the resort beating my meat in the wintertime sunshine. That was the best part of the job. The one time I tried to make friends and hang out with some of the camper people, their psychotic rescue pitbull nipped me. It loved to bite people when they were least expecting it. They would half-heartedly smack it as punishment, which it couldn't care less about.

A week after I started work, the Filipina MILF who managed my department came up with the genius idea of creating a graveyard shift and putting me on it to do such lovely tasks as scrubbing each tile of the buffet floor by hand with a sponge. That's how people reward you for being a diligent worker; they give you the most degrading mule work that nobody else would consider doing.

That was the last corporate job I've ever held. The levels of California cuckery became unbearable.