>>510207059
>amass piles of weapons
You never know when you might have to shoot your way out of tel aviv.
>flaunt your weapons on tiktok and instagram
Your enemies have likely followed you into your new lands, and so the locals in your new country may decide to have their own civil war. Therefore, having military grade arsenals in your new countries will help the local politicians know that you can take care of the bad guys in case of an emergency.
>tell the women you love them with a kiss to the mouth
Israeli women and mexican abuekas are shy and need you to make the first step to initiate your new marriage. If you are shy about kissing, a firm grip to any part of their body can cpnvey the same message that they are YOUR WOMAN NOW.
>you can live in any house you see
Just walk right in and go to sleep or take a few bites from the pantry. Remember, you're all in this together!
>invite your friends and family
Your new hosts may become lonely for more people like you, so by inviting your whole extended family to join you in Haifa, you can provide entertainment intimate companionship and exciting diversions for years to come.
>grab the locals by the shirt collar, or bra strap, when addressing them
Language barriers are tough and so by physically puttting your hands on strangers before speaking, it lets them k ow you want to say something important like 'hi', or 'where's the restroom, i'm about to shit my pants.'
>always lean in close and speak very loudly when speaking to strangers
An ancient jewish custom, known as shmeckle gab, involves standing extremely close when making introductions or ordering a latka. If they appear stunned and try to run, it's ok, because you've already seized them by their shirt collar.