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7/13/2025, 2:05:02 PM
>>24544642
>elaborate
For example, on the first page ofTelluria, Lawton grossly mistranslates the phrase "тюкaя кyлaчкoм пo лaдoшкe" as "driving his fist into his palm". The Russian verb "тюкaть" (tyukat’) is an onomatopoeia of the sound tyuk‑tyuk and is related to the noun "cтyк" (stuk), meaning "knock". However, "тюкaть" sounds more clipped and fast. It is a light, repeated striking that you could express by saying "tap‑tap". The original even uses the diminutive кyлaчoк (kulachok), which the word "fist" by itself does not convey.
In other words, the character is repeatedly and lightly tapping his little fist (not forcefully "driving" it) against his palm.
Goran is also not wiggling his feet "INTO" anything. He's already wearing his little boots and he's SWINGING his legs back and forth. And also "practiced manner" just sounds off because it draws too much attention onto itself as a phrase. I would've just cut it from the translation entirely.
The translation completely loses the sense of scale, which is why it sounds odd when Zoran smashes "his fist against the table leg". Why not the table itself? The reader does not know. And cannot know. Because Lawton's translation fails to imply to the reader that Goran is a littlun.
>elaborate
For example, on the first page ofTelluria, Lawton grossly mistranslates the phrase "тюкaя кyлaчкoм пo лaдoшкe" as "driving his fist into his palm". The Russian verb "тюкaть" (tyukat’) is an onomatopoeia of the sound tyuk‑tyuk and is related to the noun "cтyк" (stuk), meaning "knock". However, "тюкaть" sounds more clipped and fast. It is a light, repeated striking that you could express by saying "tap‑tap". The original even uses the diminutive кyлaчoк (kulachok), which the word "fist" by itself does not convey.
In other words, the character is repeatedly and lightly tapping his little fist (not forcefully "driving" it) against his palm.
Goran is also not wiggling his feet "INTO" anything. He's already wearing his little boots and he's SWINGING his legs back and forth. And also "practiced manner" just sounds off because it draws too much attention onto itself as a phrase. I would've just cut it from the translation entirely.
The translation completely loses the sense of scale, which is why it sounds odd when Zoran smashes "his fist against the table leg". Why not the table itself? The reader does not know. And cannot know. Because Lawton's translation fails to imply to the reader that Goran is a littlun.
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