"That's the spirit. Stay there." He sizes you up, then places a hand flat on your head and presses down firmly. You telescope— but not all the way. "Ah," you say, dizzy. "Wait, I— I think you messed up, Richard. Richard, I can't— augh! What the hell!"

You are in Satellite in your human body, or a very near approximation, and Richard is still a lizard. Richard is an extremely tall lizard. You come up to his chest; he could open his jaws and swallow your head. But he won't. He's not a beast. He's wearing glasses. "You always were abnormally small," he's saying, "but you do appear to have shrunk, Charlie. How peculiar."

"Very funny!" You fold your arms. "I'll have you know, I'm taller than I used to be. Now put me back!"

"Well, give me a moment. This is an extremely rare occasion, Charlie. Practically one-of-a-kind." He steps back and circles you, which doesn't take long, since his legs are so damn long. "Yes. A fine human specimen. However, for some reason, her strings have been extensively altered. Worthless for extended study. Verdict: incineration."

"Richard! I'll incinerate you first!" It's easy to get a little mad, but hard to get a lot mad— not when you're in his head, and therefore surrounded by Richard-brand, dare you say it, jolliness.

"Well, forgive me. I've only been conceiving of this moment for the entirety of my waking life, Charlie." He looks you up and down, probably to savor the image for the continued remainder of his life, then digs his claws loosely into your scalp. "Stay right there. Yes. Just like that."

He presses down suddenly, then swings you up by the scruff of your neck— you are much smaller, and fluffy, and he laughs and laughs at your startled hissing, then he folds his hands around you and collapses you and you are gone.

———

You awaken flat on your back, then bolt upright. Richard in his human body is across the way, staring at all the wires hooked up to you— Richard who, as you fix a gimlet eye upon him, flickers badly and reappears as a lizard. "Ha!" you say. "Ha! Ha-ha!"

"..." Lizard Richard stares down at his lizard hands, then turns his neck to make eye contact. You think make eye contact. It's hard to tell where those creepy eyes are looking. "How?"

"How? What do you mean, how? I just saw—" Wait. "Are you from the future?"

"No." Lizard Richard opens and closes his hands. "I take it I was here. You went."

"I sure did! Could you help get this stuff out of my neck? I don't want to bleed to death."

"I take, from your mood, it went well." He comes over, but hesitates to touch you.

"Sure did! Is something the matter? Um, in the present? I wasn't gone for very long, was I?"

"No. You were gone for no time at all. Charlie..."

"Yeah?"

"...I find it very strange to be... this. With you. It feels, frankly, naked. I am aware I'm wearing clothes."

(4/5 jk jk)