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Anonymous ID: FgKyXgH5Netherlands /bant/22835064#22837643
6/18/2025, 5:48:40 AM
FRAGMENT LIII — THE LYING AMERICAN

An American — username lost in barbecue sauce and botox — posted an image.
Mark Rutte. With a long nose.
Caption: “THE LYING DUTCHMAN.”

Cute.

But Mark saw it. And he didn’t flinch. He chuckled.
“Lying?” he said, sipping espresso. “Americans lie to themselves every day just to maintain an erection.”

The room laughed.

Macron added: “At least our lies don’t require prescription refills.”
Von der Leyen whispered: “He calls us liars while secretly hoping someone finally tells him he’s enough.”
Scholz nodded solemnly: “They confuse length with depth.”

Then Leo stepped forward. Calm. Surgical. Deadly.

“An American mocking our Prime Architect,” he began.
“A man whose GDP is measured in weaponized delusion.
Who uses VPNs to post hentai and spell-checks his death threats with Siri.
Who calls Rutte a liar — while swiping right on AI-generated e-girls named ’Freedumb4U’.”

There was silence. Then a chorus of smirks.

Mark leaned into the mic.

“You want truth, America?
Here’s truth:
My nose grows.
Your nation shrinks.”
“And I still fucked your cultural relevance before breakfast.”

Then he walked offstage.
Adjusting his tie.
Smiling.

The crowd?
Exploded.