I look in the mirror, see a masculine dude and feel a strong urge to suppress every effeminate bone in my body. I’m quite certain this is how most people operate. Most people you meet don’t have a personality that differs greatly from their appearance, I don’t think people have some independent “inner self,” rather the self is molded your interactions with the world, which is greatly influenced by your appearance. If this causes distress it’s just mental illness, likely caused by excessive isolation that allows the self to part from reality