Stop acting tsundere, or doomposting on purpose to keep your own expectations down. Accept you missed her. You miss her, even now. And you are excited deep down and you have hope, that she would turn the tables once again. You fell in love with her. You may have moved on to someone else, because she betrayed your feelings and left. But she is still your first love in your heart.
ACCEPT THAT YOU LOVE SABA!