Idk I don't like alcohol that much and cutting I can't cut cause I don't want people to see. Also I feel that if I order alcohol I will change my mind when it arrives.

For multiple reasons I don't think I can do more than a handjob, even years in i don't think so like maybe years in but idk

But no sexual appeal.
Built like a plank.
I don't have a desire to do stuff with her.
Known her for 2 years. We text a lot. Together for 3 months now.
She's the perfect person on paper.
She only works and goes home. Just like me. Goes out every now and then to like concerts.

Why do I feel nothing? We've never kissed. Idk. It's like I want to feel something, but I just don't feel any sexual feelings.

I DON'T WANT TO MESS THIS UP
She's like 1 in 100 million in quality. A rare woman. Not like the rest of the used up whores. If I mess this up, I'm screwed for life, but I also feel like I'm settling in the sense that I don't love her like that. I also don't want to rob her of a guy that will make her feel loved