>>212878938
Sam Hyde is now legally the property of Harland Williams.
After reviewing all the evidence the court feels that Harland's destruction of Sam was so absolute the only option was to make Harland Williams the legal parent and guardian of the manchild known as Sam Hyde.
Because Mr. Hyde is clearly mentally ill and prone to violent temper tantrums he is to be placed into a conservatorship like Britney Spears. Mr. Harland Williams will immediately assume full control of all Mr. Hyde's assets, all Mr. Hyde's bank accounts and of Mr. Hyde himself.
This judgment is final and cannot be appealed.