>>40730505
Forgot the picture i meant to attach to it, but this gives me a chance to talk more, so whatever.

I feel like I ruin everything I touch and everything is my fault, and I know its an OCD symptom and that's not the case, but fuck.

My friend and my husband were like "this guy is a scam" but what if he was our one shot?
What if we can't get a place because of our landlady and my medical debt?
I don't know what to do besides call and apply to places that will probably have an AI that will reject us.

I desperately want a place that allows pets because I want to take one of the neighborhood strays with me and give him a life, but I'm scared I can't and it makes me want to cry more.

I'm tired of how many places have an application fee and that kind of shit is making me justify the 50 bucks the guy online was asking for, because if big places can ask for money, why can't he? Why didn't we just send him the fucking money and get things sorted? Why is my brain so fucking fixated on that place?

I know its not logical but when you're seemingly 5 mental illnesses in a trenchcoat its hard to tackle things reasonably, especially when your brain is telling you that everyone would be better without you being a leech dragging them all down.