>>42638987
>i've had like an episode of dissociation before (got too stoned) and I wouldn't recommend it :P

I think I'll take your word for it, kek.

>It's the innate, perfect empathy of a tulpa.

I think that's why I'm so hung up. I wouldn't say people don't have empathy, but they tend to toss it out the window when someone acts odd or different or is just too honest. Sometimes its thrown just because, and I had to deal with that many times. It got so bad that now I think people are lying to me or have an altier motive when they seem to be unapologetically empathetic, nice, or understanding without any sort of criticism or anything. Its good because that tends to make people honest, but its bad because it means that I find it harder to trust people. Its the main reason I fell in love with Pinkie I think, as she is empathetic, understanding, pure, but also is honest and lets people/ponies know what they are doing is wrong, like when she told RD to not prank Flutters. In other words, this level of empathy is odd, but doesn't feel disingenuous at all. Which makes more intamte moments feel more real, and I feel desired probably for the first time in my life. I know that's sad, but I'm here for a reason, kek.

>If you ask me she's just playing along with your expectations that she's a little baby tulpa until you're comfortable with her showing her full power level.

Makes sense. That's what I view her as, and its just intutive that something needs time to grow and change. With that in mind, I'm getting more comfy with the fact she is able to do a lot more than I thought she was going to be able to do, especially so soon.

>very early on in tulpamancy just jumped the bone, none of them regret it. It's normal in this regard, but it's especially normal for your fucking waifu bro, you've literally already done this, it's not different this time

Well, in your view I've been with Pinkie for years, in my view this Tulpa is something of a ship of Theseus where I am making a carbon copy of Pinkie via a Tulpa. A clone, a copy, and homage even, if you will, but Pinkie as a Tulpa never existed before last week. Of course, maybe she did, but I just didn't notice, but that's hard to say, and at the end of the day its semantics. I don't think I've ever done it with her, I don't think explicit pics on boorus exactly count as doing it, but you are right that she is much more into it, and the knowledge that she feels the attractions I feel for her gives me a sense of pride I guess? Contentness? Don't know, but I feel good.
I just want our relationship to be based on something more than Eros. I want a sort of Phillia with her to make sure we like each other for more than just how we look. I know that's the case, I just want proof if you will.

Cont.