Somehow i pulled a goth baddie (an actual goth not the egirl kind), met her at a concert alongside her huge group of friends and we exchanged contacts. I wrote her yesterday and she didn't reply for 4 hours, in that 4 hours i had the hardest gym session of my life, fighting my inner demons while doing unreal PRs for myself, grunting, yelling, screaming, dropping weight, staring into the void in between sets, my heart pounding, my thoughts racing, my breath being so fast it's like i was having a panic attack. She replied to me and invited me to a concert and was generally very warm to me. She said she honestly doesn't remember how i looked like but she will know me when she sees me. It's such a weird thing to say but after me being insecure about my looks for years it just fucking melted my heart.
Even before this happened this has been the best year of my life. I basically carried my ass from the deepest hole i dug for myself.
