every time I come on here some diaper-worshipping boomer is crying about “the legends”
newsflash: your heroes are just bald old men in piss rags selling greatest hits CDs at Walmart
if you still blast this baldcuckery you deserve to be locked in a retirement home with them
Ozzy Osbourne Oozy Diaperborne, drooling through a mushy Pampers, barely capable of grunting words
King Diamond Cuck Diapermound, falsetto tantrums straight out of the nursery
Judas Priest Judas Pee-Stain, leather-clad geriatrics leaking into adult diapers mid-solo
Iron Maiden Iron Mayonnaise, dad-rock diaper parade, Eddie just a mascot for bowel incontinence
Metallica Metalli-poopia, billionaires filling Huggies while whining about Napster like spoiled toddlers
Slayer Spray-Her, Depends-shredding geriatrics pretending they’re still edgy teens
Megadeth MegaWet, Mustaine crying in his piss diaper while hallucinating about Metallica stealing his bottle
Motörhead Moist-head, same bar diaper anthem on repeat for 40 years, Lemmy leaking from every orifice
Black Sabbath Black Shat-bath, the sound of geriatrics groaning on the toilet
Dio Pee-o, elf-sized diaper gremlin squeaking about rainbows while soaking his onesie
stop kneeling to diaper rock relics
stop pretending boomer piss anthems are “essential”
the only true metal is dissonant filth that sounds like a sewer pipe collapsing
anything else is just baldcuck nursery music for geriatrics in Depends