>IDBLT

My parents wanted to invite a colleague of my father who is a shrink, she is kinda famous and lots of people talk about her online... they wanted her to "fix" me, specifically the me seeing everything unclean thing... but that will never work... I will need to tell her everything about me? HA! As if! As if I can just tell her about how I can see the world ending in the next 5 minutes, and yet have a heart full of hopes to read all the Maeda-sensei ge in the next 10 years, As if I can tell her that I hate everyone, yet I feel pity and compassion and nearly want to cry when ever I see a beggar on the streets, As if I can tell her that I don't feel lonely while living with no social connection IRL or on the internet at all... only recently I started being more connected to people... but that always happened, then I will block everyone and go alone on the internet for couple of year, then feel super lonely and pathetic and join a community... just to block them and repeat everything... yah am sure she can fix me... am sure she can fix my view on myself being the most special human ever and seeing my self as a different entity that is higher than everyone else... what backs it up? Dates and numbers that are also special and related to me... my birthdate? The dates for things that happened to me? The luck I sometimes face... the dreams that came to me and become true in the same day? Am not like the rest... am sure one day the world will recognize that... one day I will be live, and someone will think that I did post here... I will deny it with the biggest smirk ever... I will deny ever existing... I will deny ever being online... I will deny ever leaving my room... I will deny leaving my mother's womb... I will deny ever being in this world... I will deny the universe... so... the shrink is going to fix me... how? Meds? wwwwwwww those are for sick people and not special ones. Ain't going to work on me and will not fix sheeit. Simple as that.