>>42517599
>but desu it's the only thing the fic has going for it for the first 8.5 chapters
I mean, I really don't think there was anything wrong past chapter 2 other than the pace being too slow in parts. I disagree with Twiflag on the prologue, but maybe my problem with it (and other early fics like it) is that it spends too much time on exposition, when in 2010 + 15, it's all second-nature to us and usually gets skipped in modern fics.
>Huh? Citation needed?
I'm actually conflicted between wanting the Princesses to genuinely be nefarious and wanting them to merely be self-interested obstacles, but either way, it's good that they're subtly antagonistic. It may be a prevalent trope in (bad) older fics, but we haven't been getting enough of it in the club.
>but I haven't actually finished the part of the fic we were supposed to read
Twiflag's already said it, but
>>>
Malevolent spirits aside, this is literally reading the first quarter of a drama fic (and this fic is missing a [Drama] tag) and then getting frustrated that nopony has reconciled yet.
>When she's not lashing out at everypony around her, at least.
She just hasn't realised how important Fluttershy is to her and projects her expectations of herself onto her friends, then gets upset when they don't live up to them exactly. It's all classic RD.
>OTEM
First of all, I have read neither Dangerous Business nor Easthorse ^:). I'd believe that Lost and Found references them extensively, and the main similarity with Off the Edge I saw was the Appleshy stuff compared to OTEM's Flutterdash. In terms of prose, what stood out to me the most about Off the Edge was the high-quality diction, and the grammar really isn't that bad. Chapter 1 of OTEM isn't nearly as bad about misusing words as most of Lost and Found ("rapport" of hooves instead of presumably "rapping" or similar). However, I thought Lost and Found has a more interesting and complex narrative structure than simply "let's get home, already". Most of the "adventure" there is oceans, ice caves, and dragons, which are nice, but I wouldn't say that they're superior to Lost and Found, or even that LaF's adventure is poor at all. As settings, I even prefer "ruins with mysterious tablets", "dead valley with haunted mansion", and "desolate, windigo-infested mountains". I'd say LaF's Appleshy scenes are prettier and more interesting than OTEM's Flutterdash, since Appleshy interact with the setting more than simply passing through it, and Flutterdash is, in many places, just SoL but in X setting.
>>42517676
>best princess's right-to-the-point efficiency was a lot of fun
Luna's got a great scene later. She's nuanced and not-entirely-helpful and still better than Celestia.
>I stopped right after AJ and FS were railroaded onto the wasteland path
You should continue because they ARE being manipulated by evil magic and their eventual resolution is pony kino.