>>41586789
Additionally, my belief that this is the right decision, the reason I made this post in the first place is because of something weird that happened the other night.
The other night, I was taking a walk down the street, and was thinking to myself, "I wish that I could be shown a sign of some sort, that I'm on the right path, something unambiguous."
I looked up at the sky and saw a shooting star. Except I've never seen one before, I thought it was a drone at first, or something.
Throughout my life I've had weird coincidences happen. I don't really feel like they're explainable, part of me wants to just brush them off as coincidences, as there's basically an infinite amount of factors, and it makes sense for things to align at weird moments.
These things happen more frequently when I begin meditating again. The first "real" coincidence was a prophetic dream that may have saved my life. It was scary when it happened, as it was incomprehensible to me and I kept trying to find a reason behind it.
It feels like I'm walking the line between developing psychosis and figuring everything out. I have a few family members who have schizophrenia and I know there's a nonzero chance of me being susceptible to it too. But I'm rational. I know it might not be real, but the coincidences are just really strange. Manifestation is real. I manifested being less ugly. People are nicer to me now. I manifested my mom getting a raise. I manifested a comfy job. But it was all still a lesson, that none of these selfish things will bring me fulfillment. I do not know what to do now, or where to go. Sorry for the blogpost.