fkin relapsed last night didn't i
went to a concert and drank about 6 beers then went ballistic on the ketamine like usual. massive gap in my memory from like midnight till 5am. my cat's still alive and seems unfazed so that's good i guess.

spent most of today lying on my back checking my pulse anfnot to die and trying to not think i'm dying discovering new unexplained bruises on my body

dunno if i should tell my senpai/na & aa groups about it as i cba to grovel and analyze it

fucksake i'm beyond help aren't i

really bottled it this time fakin ell lads