>>40916751
i spent my ban doing a little soul-revival and more isolated than usual self-analysis. studying the contrast between myself and my shadow in different dissociative states

https://youtu.be/6bHbpbvIXbs

>>40895944
mood

https://youtu.be/N4Iv8xzDMrc

>>40803021
warframe is basically runescape but for super adhd people that need constant flashy colors and action like myself. also the synchronicities i've experienced connected with that game are meaningful to me. i somewhat associate her with dagoth ur of morrowind, both have ties to death, undeath and plague (her powers do viral status effect damage)

https://youtu.be/K_u6ft1PioM

>>40784148
i let my ego die and embraced my rebirth into something changed by the spirits. you can keep a part of yourself as a backup of your original self tho. you have to already have dissociatively fractured as a person first, you allocate one of those pieces as the backup. give it a name or something and you can recall it whenever you want

https://youtu.be/cHJ_kh3mB30

>>40774335
as a former optimistic nihilist, i can shed some insight on this. without belief in spirits or gods, the world has a tinge of pointlessness to it. you do stuff, but you don't really know why you do it, you just do because that's what you do. i think nihilists try to find comfort in what they can in the face of existential meaninglessness, so a glass of chocolate milk would still be pretty enjoyable

>>40774336
if you still like girls and are presumably male, that'd make you bi