>>41484291
>I guess I also have no frame of reference for other people's productivity, outside of my family.
An old prof of mine used to say there are 4 hours of peak productivity in a day. That is, time where you are actually focused. The rest of the time is at most busywork. As in, you can spend 4 hours (including breaks) a day learning, planning, doing high level tasks, but any more time than that is better spent on things such as paperwork, copying or prettying up notes, things like that. And weekends are to recuperate, so there ought to be days with no work at all.
>building those bonds without feeling pushy or like I'm forcing friendship
It is painful, and part of the pain is to accept there is no such thing as forcing friendship. Actually the pic in >>41477092 relates in this case. You gotta accept that other people must be given the agency to set their own boundaries. You can ask if you are overbearing but it is THEIR choice, not yours. You preemptively making yourself small is hurting your relationships.
>Honestly, anon, it feels like people are just so distant that asking them how they feel about anything would just aggravate them.
Has it before? Frankly, if it does, then let them be aggravated. It is worth trying because I sure as hell wouldn't be. Some people just won't be compatible with you and driving those off early also has benefits. Take it from me, people that can deal with you exist. Plenty. What repels some attracts others, fearing to repel anyone is essentially identical to opting to attract nobody. Nobody's favorite flavor is water. And everyone's fav is disliked by someone else.
>It feels like some guys just brush me off too for being too nerdy or awkward
It sounds like you feel like people don't want you/are creeped out by you. There is a high chance you fall into the common pitfall of mind reading. You make too many assumptions about what people want from and out of you.