How does anyone do it at all, how does anyone even manage to befriend people or even find someone that will actually be your friend? I feel mentally exhausted, as if I am a husk of my former self, no longer being able to connect or talk to people like I used to. I am tired, I feel so tired.
I feel like I have no friends whatsoever, I know I do but it feels as if nobody really cares, I'm always down to help anyone with their troubles and worries in life but no one is really there for me. I always feel alone and ignored, no one ever really invites me to things, I have to force myself onto them. It doesn't help that with every new person I become "friends" with, I end up being tossed away within days, sometimes being nice feels like its for nothing. I could disappear for a week and I know nobody will DM me or ask for little old me. As much as I try to care about others, I don't feel like they care about me.
At a certain extent I don't even know what I'm looking for anymore, I end up letting others use me as a doormat, I end up being so naive. I really enjoy the game but its fucking with my mind even more, I wish things were like before.

But oddly enough, for whatever it may be, I end up feeling so much better around you all in L144, even if I'm just idling. I hope to know all of you one day.