2000s kid here, ill never have a gf and will be a khv forever, but aside from that, things are fine for now.

I really wish i hadnt ruined things with the chick i had a crush on in highschool, she probably felt the same way toward me. Im probably gonna think about this for the rest of my life.

Why don't you start developing nostalgia for the current year, so you can look back on it someday? You say each year gets worse and worse after all - maybe today isn't so bad in comparison to the future.