Replace your substance habit with a prayer habit.
Salat will bring you true inner peace, discipline and structure your life, and heal your sadness and trauma.
Here is a guide to praying Salat.
https://salamcenter.org/wp-content/uploads/2020/09/Prayer-Guide.pdf
If you take the Shahada and keep Salat, you are a Muslim!
I invite to Islam, recite the Shahada and begin your spiritual journey on the Straight Path to God:
La ilaha ill Allah Muhammadur Rasul Allah
That means:
There is no god but God and Muhammad is His Messenger.