Nice try. Jimmy Stewart was the rare celebrity whose off-screen character actually matched the earnest, decent roles he played.Everyone who met him says he was genuinely kind.

He stayed in the Air Force Reserve for decades and retired a brigadier general—the highest-ranking Hollywood veteran in U.S. history. He enlisted as a private at age 32, flew twenty bomber missions over Europe, and came home a colonel.

He funneled the residuals from every rerun of The Jimmy Stewart Show into children’s libraries and small-town theater programs, especially in his hometown of Indiana, Pennsylvania.

Stick with your morphine addict.