Like most people, I like watching sexy people in swimsuits.
However, I only enjoy drowning when it's either:
>myself or
>the other character/person is sexually enjoying it
That it to say:
>non-sexual drowning doesn't turn me on
>rape doesn't turn me on

On the other hand, some girl acting all smug while masturbating and drowning is insanely hot to me.
There's just something about ignoring your death for the sake of an orgasm that I really enjoy.

I had social anxiety for a long time and I managed to get rid of most of it, but other people who had/have that condition know that overthinking everything is a big part of it.
Asphyxiation like this really acts like a brain switch where you stop thinking about everything. Sexual and survival instinct just take over and you finally get a break from thinking. Like, it's weird but it plays an important part as well.

The weird thing is that it's really my only actual mental defect.
I'm fine with regular sex with women, and I actually hate anal sex.
I can't think of any other paraphilia. I'm NOT into feet or any body part fetish. I'm NOT into getting pissed nor vore nor "giant(ess)" nor anything really.

But underwater, I just wanna act bratty, be bred and suck cocks while on the edge of death.

I'll just add that I don't encourage doing any asphyxiation stuff by yourself.

If you have questions, feel free to ask.

PS: I have a suicidal history but it isn't tied to this at all. I have never considered actual suicide for a sexual reason.