The only regular sexual partner I have these days is married. We have been fucking for about 2 years now and it's been fun to explore some kinky things with each other. We are good friends too so it's a very comfortable situation.
The fact that it's so functional has made me realize that I have pretty severe commitment issues. I like this situation BECAUSE i know it's not going anywhere. I can relax, knowing that I'm not going to be pressured to live together, see each other a certain number of times a week, etc.
I have real commitment issues. Usually this is where someone says, "....but I'm working on them," but I don't want to. I don't like being in a relationship. Yes I've done it before, for years at a time. It can be nice, but i realize that i prefer to be single. I like having people in my life who i enjoy, but I don't like having to revolve my life around someone else.
I wonder if I will always feel this way. I'm almost 40 so I guess this is it. Picrel.