When I was with my ex, I gained like 100 pounds and became this really gross blob creature. Also, it's so cringe, but I kind of laugh when I think about this thing I used to do. I would wake up to go the bathroom and she would be in the kitchen, and while I'm waiting for my pee stream to start, or during it, I would start slapping my ass really hard making this really loud popping sound when I did it. You know the slap sound. I don't know why I did it but I'm cracking up right now even thinking about how much of a turn-off that must have been for her and I did it constantly. LIke every day get up to pee, then *pop *pop *pop as I slap my own ass LOL. What a dumbass. She stopped wanting to be sexual with me for the last 8 months of our relationship before she broke up with me. No surprise. I also made her sleep on the floor because I've never been able to sleep with someone in the same bed. Instead of buying a separate bed for her or something she just slept on the floor. LOLLL