>Be me
>26 man, khhv, in existential crisis

>Privilege-fully (enough to sustain my heart beat without wage slaving. for now...) and unfortunately (not from a comfortable family where can get minimum wedge as monthly pocket money) No job, spend my all time just to try composing a piece of music(what i'm focusing now. spending all my day on it), learning languages (french now. postponed), and going outside for photographing (friday and weekends and whenever i'm so frustrated and stuck in composing music).

>looking good enough to get mired by random girls in any place. but not an out scaled chad who women jumping over him
>By logic of the internet, the girls should approach me but somehow they intimidated by me and just watching me
>I could just go talk to the girls as much as i can. And by having this unsettling mind i'm actually desperate to catch any of the girls
>But i'm always thinking they're not good enough to make an effort. I think most of them (who i sense i can make an interaction with. not just any women flashed 0.5 second in my sight or a casher) are just little bit pretty and i wouldn't think of them as long term partners. I just think getting raid is not worth for my life.

>To be honest, i feel myself is having a serious confidence problem. Because i've fucked myself by not doing anything (even if i knew what i want to) during my early 20's and now i'm trying to unfuck myself and it seems so fucking hopeless and get stuck in almost every measure in writing music and by prolonged hermitage my social skills are dulled.
>Thus i'm not sure if i can make a move even if i encounter again a woman who swallows my whole world. I'm fucking sure she's not gonna come up to me first instead of just passed by finally. Because the previous ones didn't.

What am i wrong? Am i autistic? depressed? too high standard?