I wish I was a great man, with great genetics, with great body and great skills. That I would be such a magnificent lover that my dick would be like a drug to her.

Can't deal with the fact that I am not.

She probably at one point had so called one night stands with someone. No love, just lust, ovulation.
And I in my turn love her. How pathetic.

I am mentally ill. My soul is torn apart.

I was googling her, like I usually do from time to time. And this time I decided to use a set of words I never used before. And I've got a new photo of hers. She's gorgeous. She's mind-blowing. She's sublime.
I want to bloe my brains out. I need to. The only way out.

I love her

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