>>40687312
tysm anon :) Im doing p okay actually, im still at the psychiatric hospital but i went on a fun camping trip and have been connecting w a lot of people recently---its been a pretty good summer so far. i had to say goodbye to some of the kids at the school going off to kindergarten which was p sad, but im just so proud of all of them and how much they grew this year so im sure they'll do great! im mostly just so happy i got to work w them. also I just saw Weapons and even though i normally dont do well w horror movies i actually really enjoyed it, like it was really well done!
>>40687319
oh i see, i can never remember how these kinds of things went down
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I got assaulted at age 4. I didnt remember it until I was 25. I got bullied at age 7. I felt alone. I moved two times throughout school. I got laughed at by others. An acquaintance once told me nobody wanted to hang out with me. I felt different from everyone else. I had poor facial structure and symmetry and I cried whenever the teacher would call on me up until middle school. My high school teacher wrote a note to my parents saying there was something seriously wrong with me and I needed help. We laughed it off. I spent most of my time alone. I am unable to move on. I lost somatic agency. I got my psyche shattered by psychedelics because I awoke to jagged iron in my side. The first thing I did when I stopped dissociating was cry. I reintegrated my inner self and it caused a severe system overload. I didnt know how I could ever live from then on. I still don’t.
In elementary school i prayed to God that I would wake up a girl. He betrayed me. I disliked my dick enough to do things to it that i won’t say. When I was 11 I put on my mother’s dress and smiled sadly in the mirror.
When I was 16 I was deep into repression yet I cried singing Lana del rey alone in the backyard dressed up in a similar button down shirt. When I was 17 i realized I felt more and more feminine by the day. Yet I grew more and more masculine.
I was depressed at age 18 and it never stopped. I was unable to enjoy vacations during childhood. I hit things really hard to feel pain during high school. I had two weeks off from work and in the hotel room alone all I could think about was how itd feel to jump out from the 14th story window.
I will never stop self harming. I got raped by my boyfriend. I got rejected by others. I got used for someone I wasnt by my ex. People dont believe that Im trans. They dont understand the circumstances that made me who I am. I had my sense of self shattered. I am a drug addict.
In elementary school i prayed to God that I would wake up a girl. He betrayed me. I disliked my dick enough to do things to it that i won’t say. When I was 11 I put on my mother’s dress and smiled sadly in the mirror.
When I was 16 I was deep into repression yet I cried singing Lana del rey alone in the backyard dressed up in a similar button down shirt. When I was 17 i realized I felt more and more feminine by the day. Yet I grew more and more masculine.
I was depressed at age 18 and it never stopped. I was unable to enjoy vacations during childhood. I hit things really hard to feel pain during high school. I had two weeks off from work and in the hotel room alone all I could think about was how itd feel to jump out from the 14th story window.
I will never stop self harming. I got raped by my boyfriend. I got rejected by others. I got used for someone I wasnt by my ex. People dont believe that Im trans. They dont understand the circumstances that made me who I am. I had my sense of self shattered. I am a drug addict.