Thread 149883050

meme20 internationals

county cricket tuesday

Old Trafford Test starts wednesday

YFO

Unfortunately we can't drink anymore bevause we need to keep a level head and find more funds for work tomorrow and to bomb more Palestinian children
Real shame

Shut the fuck about your sad fucking flat you freak, Maybe then you'd stop getting baited as well. Don't talk about it.

also fuck off sebbo

>>149883050 (OP)
The union flag has no relevance to cricket whatsoever

nobody mentioned flats ITT you schizo neek freak

>>149880557
>got out trying to sweep
bard the bazballer
bardball

Seriously all you needed to do was play like Boycott, and not attack anything in the corridor and then prepare to forward drive when you force him to bowl straight at the wicket.

bard played too much The Hundred (not cricket) a couple of years back so lost all technique and now thinks the foot cut is an acceptable shot

>>149883153
Is the flag of three test nations, was the flag/on the flag of all the others at one stage.

You have to always bear in mind that bowlers, except for spinners, aren’t bowlers because of their intellectual prowess. You should be able to frustrate them by not making it easy for them and never showing them you’re afraid

I love my flat

Why do I have work tomorrow?
Careless behavior
My parents were psychopaths

>>149883271
not Afghanistan

Wish my parents had never had me
Considering having me means endless toil

>please pay me a salary too mummy
you're sounding pathetic

Working is so fucking shit
Can't believe we actually have to do this trash for actually 8 hours a day
Actually barbaric

>8 hours
yeah ok 9-3 then r/bouldering man

Lovely evening in Perivale tonight. Might take the doggo for a walk on Horsenden Hill

>>149883225
Would have inevitably nicked one behind if I tried doing that
The one I tried sweeping felt like it was down leg and also high desu

would rather be dead than live in perivale not even joking

(he's joking)

(he is basically joking)

mental how it's been looming since 3pm
Toil needs to be made illegal

'chabin bla x
>>149883846
how's 'ol basil, fella¿

You won't succeed on Broadway if you don't have any Jews

>England confirmed by ICC as host for next three WTC finals
this is a bit grim but I guess we're trying to undermine this zoomer '''''trophy''''' as much as possible which is nice

I am a genius

Think the Australia batting lineup is so bad these days that even England's eighth rate bowling attack will restrict them to about 274 per innings on average

Unfortunately our batsmen are complete mental midgets with absolutely no grit so our own innings average during the Ashes will be about 161 and Root will never make a ton in Australia

will be quite a close ashes
their batting is basically just smith and the bowling is cummins and boland (starc's not that good because he bullied memedies)
could draw the series I reckon

wow nice analysis bruh

wow nice analysis bruh

>don't talk about the cricket in the cricket thread, it all has to be about me and my mum's flat
twat

morning lads
enjoyed waking up and reading a bit of fanfiction while I sit on the toilet squeezing out an england

Never played a cross batted shot in my life. Leave, drive, forward defensive, or nurdle to leg. Simple as.

My Welsh dad is very funny with money

never managed a pull then mate? haha

Needs a lobotomy in some ways

Our batting is relatively elite (Duckett, Root, Brook, and Smith are, at least)
Their bowling is even more elite (Cummins, Hazlewood, Starc, Boland, all better than anybody we've got)
Our bowling is as shit as their batting
If the series were in England, it'd be close
Seeing as we've got a bunch of mental midget tarqs with no grit whatsoever, the very best outcome we can hope for is a 3-1 loss

>>149884960
Do you play the nurdle to leg off straight balls, or is it too risky?
Need to develop some low-risk scoring shots
Genuinely just have blocks and muscular six-hitting strokes, and nothing in between

Smoth is on the downward turn these days, but it won’t matter. England will bowl short and slow like they always do, wilt in the heat, and some meme Aussie with only 2 first class matches will hit a career launching 143* against a tired attack just before lunch of the second day of the first test. Englands spinner across the whole series will average 55 with a economy rate of 5.11

>our batting is elite
>their bowling is even more elite

>>149885004
Only to balls I think are drifting down leg. My batting strategy is very similar to classic stick cricket.

>>149885013
>>149885033
Name a better bowling attack in world cricket than theirs or a better batting attacking in world cricket than ours
Doesn't exist, doesn't exist

>>149885039
What sort of strike rate do you go at?
You sound like you open and tick along at a solid 41.32, often making it to drinks having got to 27* or maybe 34* but then falling short soon thereafter when trying to up the tempo a little bit

my only shot was the slog (batted at 11)
think my highest score ever was like 9
only played 3-4 games but it didn't go very well for me in the nets either kek. batting is a bit shit and let's be real, it's mainly for the unathletic fatties

our batting isn't elite at all and Root is the only decent player
just a bunch of sloggers mixed with genuine shitters who belong nowhere near int cricket like Crawley and Pope. no idea what you're on about there bard

sitting in my flat
pondering my next move

>>149884957
noice x

morning SebLORD
thanks for the tips on the tomatoes the other day finna have a solid crack at em this year got some nice heirloom varieties to put in
hope ya been well m8

I am not funny with money

>>149885065
Get yersen back to your local club side, I see a big future ahead of you (even if it's as an athletic bowlsman)

>>149885104
In addition to Root's average of 51, Brook averages 60, Duckett 44, Smith 56
That's four world-class bats, to whom you can add the number 1 and 3, Stokes at 6, and the likes of Woakes/Dawson/Carse at 8 and 9
As you say, it's just Crawley and Pope who are slight weaknesses, but even with them in the side England's batting is the best in the world

talking to his aus proxy again

my toil laptop seems to be taking no juice anymore so I unironically have to go the office tomorrow to pick up a new devil device

Draw looms.
Next Test will probably only see two innings completed.

Duckett, if he were Australian, wouldn't be selected for Australia he's way too unorthodox and he'd be figured out in shield. Probably avg 35 in shield

>>149885394
If Australia wouldn't select somebody who's clearly a lot better than any of their meagre opening options then I can see why their batting attack has deteriorated so much in recent years

genuinely seething right now that toil exists

>>149885394
Australia loves manlet battingers tho.

>>149885407
nice hot reddit take
how about you just end your life, you little toil pawn
Yes I partly blame you for this situation

England should make better pitches not ones where the ball struggles to bounce above the knee roll if you want to beat Australia
Problem is you get all excited watching your 'batsmen' spazball it up on dead decks and statpad then act surprised when they struggle on bouncy fast, yet predictable, AusGOD pitches.
Everytime you clowns come here the tour ends with players being dropped never to be heard from again and coaching staff being fired when the problem is your home pitches giving your boys a false sense of security
4-1 defeat looms, script writers probably give England an early win to keep people interested

>script writers
Already got your cope prepared I see.

>>149885407
Khawaja is still better than Duckett. Windies series was tough, no roads and an excellent pace attack, and he still did ok

>>149885423
They refused to pick Warner for about 5yrs until they had no other option, because Warner was seen as a white ball slogger. In hindsight it would've been better never to pick him

4-1 is generous

>>149885394
that's not true. they've had loads of literal whos opening since Langer and Hayden and Warner/Rogers/Khawaja (at their peak) have been the only good ones

also the current scoop zoomer they're trying is hardly 'orthodox'

>>149885470
Khawaja was world class for a couple of years but he's been shit since Warner retired
Needs to be put out to pasture too, but there's nobody to replace him because the other options are just as dire

If Cam Green has a career defining series then Aus will win, it's actually fairly close otherwise (their bowling attack kind of collapses when getting spazballed like we saw last series)
Thing is I don't know if Green is actually that good. everyone in Aus since Warne has been raving about him

>>149885599
He's bang average, wouldn't be close to any of their other sides in recent decades, but he's literally the only half decent young prospect in Australia at the moment

Basically if Aus make green / seaming wickets then we're finished
we don't have the bowling attack to compete and our batting will have no idea what to do against Cummins and Boland on those types of surfaces

>>149885625
Luckily Australians here have said they won't resort to doctoring pitches.

>top 5 batsmen fail (again)
>Carey Cummins Starc and Webster come in and pile on a cheeky 200
seen this episode far too many times

>>149885196
'ooin well, fella, just finished performing a yearly service on my whole house generator.

good to hear about the tomatoes. with heirloom varieties do make sure you proactively manage pests, fungus being the main one x

>>149885657
>trusting pozzies
>ever
>about anything

>we don't have the bowling attack to compete
>our batting will have no idea what to do against Cummins and Boland on those types of surfaces

Australian pitches are the fairest in the world for visiting teams
England are india tier these days with the spazball pitch doctoring

why does certain man seethe so much when people are giving their opinions about cricket in the cricket thread?
is it because he knows absolutely nothing about the sport himself and thought Ben Stokes' declaration during the last Ashes was 'sound' lmao what an idiot

>wake up
>india v englel series still going
>australia not even playing at the moment
>englel anons discussing their ashes chances
GOLD STANDARD
O
D
S
>

get to toil champ HAHA

Yorkshire lass seeks Deano only

about to go check the surf should be good bit cold but
haven't had a full time job since Mitchell Johnson wiped england in Adelaide kek

the declaration was sound
the wicket keeping wasn't

simple as

Mad how Australians are already toiling away right this moment

later lads hope you all have a good day/night
just banter m8s all love to ya

haha seething because he got given his marching orders to toil. off you go to your soulless Melbourne cubicle for the day m8

>>149885863
He literally spams this place with shit. At the moment it’s about his leasehold and “muh muh muh toil”. Last thread was half spacky the spambot.

>>149886024
I'm unironically going surfing kek
have fun

There's no way someone like Duckett gets out of shield cricket in Australia. He has no defensive shots, he's purely a result of dead pitches and bazball neither of which you'll find in Australia (because they're shit ideas that don't work)

the declaration was sound, johnny fatstow just happened to drop half a dozen catches
no idea why this is such a hard concept for your peanut brain to grasp

>>149886121
hang ten dude
*makes ridgey didge sign*

>>149884822
It’s maddening to me that Potts isn’t going to play a single Test this season, with the excuse of “muh muh fast in Aus” despite Matty’s success with the Lions.
>>149884875
It’s isn’t going to be close. Unfortunately >we will get heemed again. The batting is relying on Crawley, Pope and Brook not shitting the bed like usual.
>>149884988
Still not convinced that Smith is that good a batsmen, he certainly isn’t the best keeper choice. Even green Rew and fatty Bairstow now he’s fitter are better keepers before we start talking about Foakes.
>>149885006
They’ll go back to playing smudge at 4 and he’ll score a shot ton just because.
>>149885104
Pope could be better but he isn’t a no.3, he’s too nervous at the start of his innings and as Big Chef pointed out his stance is wrong in regards to his stance.

>>149886159
>doubling down when you're clearly wrong
grow up

won't be voting reform
won't be voting for that neocon bootlicker farage

>>149886214
Yeah Potts has been a bit unlucky. Looked decent after being brought into the side and has done fairly well in FC cricket, but seems to have fallen down the pecking order now, I guess because Tongue and Atkinson have slightly more pace and bounce (not that Potts isn't quick, though)

Smith is a bit of a slogger, but he sees the ball very cleanly and looks like the real deal to me. Agree he's not the best keeper though. Not sure if it'd work, but I'd have a go pushing Smith up to open alongside Duckett, and then bringing Rew in to keep and bat at 6

>>149886273
how am I wrong?
Obviously any declaration could look bad if you have some obese ginger wicketkeeper who can't catch a cold

bard has this weird love for Potts
think because it all went wrong with his previous crush (Parkinson) he needs a replacement

>>149886333
I think that's the first time I've posted about him in a couple of years desu, not a player I particularly care about one way or tother

Did used to big up Parky a lot, sad to see he's fallen off it a bit, because he used to be the best spinsman in thecountry

I suppose you could argue
The declaration wasn't sound considering we had johnny bairstow behind the stumps
But assuming we had a wicket keeper who could perform his most basic duties- the declaration was sound

it's not smart to declare when root at his peak was heeming the pozzie bowlers to all parts

>smart
foy

at no point was Parkinson better than Leach. statpadded on county shitters
can't step up to international level and expect the top 11 players in a country to get in trouble against 45mph bowling

going to bed (in my flat)

He averages 68 in Div 2 this year which admittedly isn't ideal
Can only assume he has quote and quote """"mental health"""" (absurd concept) due to having to live in the south

>>149886401
I can imagine the word being an alien thing to you but it's obviously not a yank one

smart to mean intelligent is definitely a yankism you brainlet

>>149886157
In fairness, he played a couple test awhile ago but got dropped and got selected by bazball to play the way he does now.
>>149886159
just picking Bairstow was a sign of poor decision making, he clearly was not fit enough and shouldn’t have been selected for the first couple of tests at the very least.
>>149886306
For me Potts > Carse, Potts can actually swing and be a stock bowler whilst Carse gets less and doesn’t look like he can bowl 25 overs an innings without breaking down. I don’t think Smith can start further up the order, I think where he is is probably the best place to bat him. I remember he started around 4/5 at the start of the season for Surrey and didn’t really do anything.
>>149886353
>>149886413
>>149886459
Still one of the top white ball spinners in the country, but he is hideously used by Bell-Drummond at Kent in the CC probably because Kent’s pace attack is utter dogshit. Last two seasons he’s bowled so many overs on first innings pitches.

>>149886506
t. just made it up

>smart to mean intelligent is definitely a yankism
dear oh dear. when you become a home owner (non asterisked) you're going to half their average IQ

meant halve

>he’s bowled so many overs on first innings pitches
sounds like perfect practice if he's to make it into brainlet ben's side with all the 'we'll bat second thanks mate' tosses

Konstas or Crawley? who you picking?

We all had a good laugh at Chris Lilley at the time, that was before we knew better

>>149887274
True but I dont even think its racist or wrong or whatever, I just realised it wasnt actually that funny

I think it is funny when he releases the guinea pigs so they have something to shoot. I can explain why

>The ICC have confirmed that the 2027, 2029 and 2031 World Test Championship finals will be held in England
seems fair to keep it at a neutral venue iykwim haha

>Imageboard barely post images
Shiggy diggy

the maori character who says 'miss' was objectively funny
probably the peak of Australian comedy - not that that's a high bar obviously

>>149887460
Britzos won't like this

See ye lads there
https://www.opb.org/article/2025/07/19/portland-st-johns-portland-cricket-pub-sports-bar/

Australia play in 15mins
Mitch Owen gets his debut

>>149887494
she seems like a proper skank

>>149887663
that shirt on the left is absolutely grire

meme fraser-mcmeme

>JFM opening and Owen batting 5
that aint right

this windies side has AURA unlike the losers in their test team

Cock Sucker-McGurk

its a shame that windies fans are vuvuzelatards

>>149887705
He's probably wearing it to put his opponent off

Funny how all Australia’s front-liners are too tired to play T20s for the national team but they have time to play in the MLC/IPL/Hundred/various slop leagues etc

Israeli captain has food poisoning

I feel like Australia should try getting a wicket or two.

>>149887926
just giving our young guns something to chase fella
ashes practice innit

connolly almost looks good with the ball
almost

>>149888014
offtopic

The Australian T20i cricket team is getting gaped

how good is a work day without meetings!

The Australian T20i cricket team is getting BLACKED

did any niggas actually turn up for this one or is it empty stands again?

>>149888147
much bigger crowd for this

>>149888136
careful! B*****D is a no-no word. I caught a 3 dayer for using it recently

You, a pleb: watching the t20
Me, a patrician: watching the unofficial test between Australia A and Sri Lanka A

>>149888184
*be's another draw*

>111/1 after 11 overs
crisp

>>149888191
Yep, that's a paddlin'

>>149888200
the supernelson

Remember when Maxwell was good?

>>149888261
Yes

Stream where

>>149888303
Kayo or cricstream

>>149888303
Right here

Is Zampa Australia's most underappreciated player?

such a clippable crowd

seems a waste to have dre russ coming in at no.6

Aussie twinks getting bummy busted

Might go to the T20 world cup next year IF Australia are drawn to play in Sri Lanka. Not a massive fan of the white ball but its as good an excuse any to holiday for a couple weeks in Sri Lanka (won’t be stepping foot in India)

My boss is taking a month off starting next week
Coincidentally I will be rorting for a month starting next week

business idea: windies ABANDONS test and odi criccy. all in on t20
simple as

>>149888473
isn’t that pretty much what they’ve done?

>>149888469
wherever I am..I must rort

>>149888473
based west indies cricket board a couple decades ago

>>149888487
...yh, just make it official innit

I MUST GAMBLE, DRINK ALCOHOL AND EAT FAST FOOD

BASED webmbro
tabla x

same old grimdies
always collapsing

>>149888558
catch!

>>149888527
thx motie xx

Classic Windies

wait Mitch Owen bowls as well?
fucken stick him in for the ashes, im sold

>>149888496
trip on burgjeet iykwim haha

>>149888567
;))

>>149888522
applied for a personal loan yet mate

>>149888587
Grace Brothers, Sydney
10 minutes champ

>>149888604
STOP DEADNAMING CHUDCEL

>>149888604
yeah mate that's grace brothers, gadigal

>>149888614
>>149888628
†Grace Sydney Hotel

last digit is how many balls JFM faces

applied for tafe yet champ?

last digit is how many shooters JFK faced iykwim haha

what dirt does mcretard have on cricket australia?

>>149888750
reminder JFM scored a combined total of 12 runs last BBL

work called

>>149888750
proof that the nsw bowling cartel (inc. current captain) were in on the ball tampering the whole time

>>149888815
of course he wants to steal the ball

>>149888827
Clearly a woman

>>149888827
oh that's a women mb lol hard to tell with these bomboclats

>>149888832
you're clearly a jeet and brown

>>149888839
she's got that JFM somatotype

>>149888846
Faggot

>>149888857
u mad bro?

>>149888864
>Glug Glug Glug

>>149888815
nigg~r being nigg~r

>>149888876
kys Pajeet nigger

>>149888872
wat.png?

>>149888901
Gay guy much?

>>149888885
found the monkey, go back to picking cotton like your ancestor

>>149888911
retarded yankjeet

>>149888915
Go back to raping Jeet nigger

>>149888924
But what am I?

>>149888926
we don't say that word here m80

Not looking good Windies-cels

>>149888936
kys

>>149888948
You first

Inglis a muppet. Go back to Yorkshire

>>149888960
lady's first
GONE GOTTEM!

why are you guys fighting?

>>149888995
it's an interesting discussion

YFO

Threadly reminder

even though it's not cricket it's good to see these apes still like t20 at least rather than basketball or soccer

>>149889003
>caste system niggas be like

>>149889003
>Threadly reminder
See >>149889001

>>149889003
What a faggot ass thread

>>149889001
MFIYA (My Fist in your Asshole)

>>149889023
why are you gay?

>>149889033
I'm not the one getting fisted, faggot

afl blowies stick out like a sore thumb

>Asshole
I hate yanks so much

>>149889052
Sorry mate forgot it's called bunghole down-under

BIG mitch owen here to save the day

Are we going to lose haven't watched a t20 since like the end of big bash?

jamaicans are monkeys

>>149889068
hes fucking quality aye

>>149889039
retarded logic
if its not gay to get your dick sucked by a man, how is it gay to get fisted?
you are doing the fisting and are actively fist fucking a mans anus therefore you are the one who is performing a gay act and i am simply receiving stimulation.

what the fuck is he saying

>>149889105
me gwan kill mehself

>>149889105
i don't like cricket

>>149889100
I'm not getting off though, you are.

>>149889105
Daylight come and me wan' go home

>>149889122
I love it, iykwim haha

fisting is bad for you

>>149889127
dont remember saying i would enjoy it

is green actually good?

YFO

>>149889161
finally hitting form post-injury

>>149889161
he was third top run scorer in Australia's last test series
take from that what you wish

Oh, Kingston Town
The place I long to be
If I had the whole world
I would give it away
Just to see the girls at play

There's a rat in me kitchen what am I gonna do?
There's a rat in me kitchen what am I gonna go?
I'm gonna fix that rat that's what I'm gonna do,
I'm gonna fix that rat

drop JFM, open with MO

>>149889275
UNDA DA SEA

>>149889275
thats Luffy from One Piece

COME ON WINDIES
FIGHT AND WIN

why doesn't the cousin-rapist play t20?

no clear evidence he touched it

nigga should have been more convincing claiming it

>>149889301
busy raping white women

>>149889322
look at how it bounces, it clearly has an adjusted trajectory from finger contact

GOTTEM

>>149889336
>exposes snicko as complete pseudoscience

COME ON WINDIES

Windies nuts iykwim haha

FUCKIN WALLOP

>le 6 and out
grow up, this isn't backyard criggy

>>149889408
sad!

>>149889418
you dont necessarily need to do every wicket - many of them aren't that interesting
appreciate the effort and webms :)

west indian cricketers are just too weak minded, they simply HATE winning. being a big black beast will only take you so far

LBW, more like Long Black Willy iykwim haha

>>149889456
I'm just bored m8. You can only goon so much in a day

Dre Russ lost them the game

DROPPED THE OWEN-LARA

CHIMP OUT

>Australia and Windies can have a trophy called the Beer-Sobers
heh

>>149889536
bit in this

>drops game
don't even care who wins but you hate to see it

flat

>>149890099
same

It’s 20 years since the 2005 ashes started today

amazing how cricket’s popularity in the UK reached its peak in 2005 and then promptly disappeared from the national consciousness

>>149890099
perk up fella

because they stopped making it free. not that amazing

>>149890684
flintoff after the accident on the right

>>149888408
great clip, saved thx

We need Israel now more than ever before. Make Australia great again.

>>149890718
fucking THIS

You guys are practicing Christians right?
You're not letting our religion die while Islam recruits aggressively in every prison in Australia right?

how old is zachy?
like 26 or something? just guessing based on the fact hes buying his first apartment

it doesn't work like that here

Not to scare anyone but...
Neil Armstrong backwards is Gnorts, Mr Alien

>>149890757
I'm a practising (Anglican) Christian, yes.

Hit racism for 6 on Saturday, lads. Feeling pretty good about it.

why the fuck is the pope condemning isreal defending themselves against terrorists

>>149890997
Oy vey! It's anuddah shoah!

>>149890918
I'm Presbyterian, but Anglican is close enough

reckon ausjeet is visiting today

/cric/ proudly stands with israel

any cricket on?

Mad how the summer of cricket ends in 2 weeks

bbl is the biggest event on /cric/, sadly

Ireland failed to schedule a single home test this summer

>>149891184
a little bit due to timezones

T20 isn't that bad

>>149891032
fish still have feeling too m8

>>149891218
depends

this TV cabinet is a bit of a slog to assemble

It can be a bit of fun and following a league or tournament of it can be interesting. It's too sweet though and the power play/fielding restrictions are overly complicated

different skillsets, took me 3hrs to put together a chest of drawers once and nearly killed me whereas the missus built 2 of them in an afternoon and no bother.
Some of us are engineering types and some of us are the opposite

the reddit IKEA
The 4chan habitat

Oi Zachy you done yet mate?

ashes this ashes that
all anyone ever cares about is the ashes

unironically not going to mention the f word ever again

fuck this fuck that it's all you ever hear nobody's even pretending to be happy everyone is frustrated and aren't bathing enough or even properly

it's always just did a poo never just had a bath
>inb4 just did a poo in the bath
you're disgusting

I see Worcestershire's Ben Dwarshuis is cleaning up international batsmen again
Just goes to show, yet again, that the T20 Blast is actually a higher level than international cricket

I hated putting together all the kit set furniture in my apartment
Half because I would strip all their screws, half because its just not that fun

cod fillets and chippy chips for lunch corrr

planning to barbecue this evening after the rain stops, been waiting four days to fire it up have to do it today because the meat is going to get old

When the Ashes aren’t on screen, all the commentators should be asking, “how does this affect the Ashes?”

leftover tandoori naan, dal makhaani and paneer jal frezi for.lunch..KORRR

sports administration isn't a real career path these people are so weird it's like wanting to go to uni so you can get into event planning

luff the IKEA blue bag for grocery.shopping ngl

It's like having a conversation with a calculator lmao if this then this so absolutely predictable and must repeat the exact words as they were taught by rote memory like multiplication tables

how do you pronounce Dwarshuis?
also just saw pics and he's a VERY funny looking cricketer ahahahahahaha

DWARF-sheeeiiiUS

>>149891948
thoughts on taking sports psychology as a PhD? is it a real career path?

ahhaaaaa...yes,quite..just looked him up x

>>149892027
You could use it in the military but you may as well just do actual psychology and join the services

>>149892018
d'woor-shuss

the gf
>>>/gif/29169205

>>149892027
You've basically got four (bad) options in sports psych, and a PhD is only actually useful for one of them (staying in academia and selling the lie to gullible students)

Number one career option is obviously working in a sports team, but that's essentially reserved for former athletes (Jeremy Snape got the exact same degree as me only with a worse grade, but was basically just ticking the boxes so that he could become the ECB sport psych straight away afterwards)

Military is an option too from the performance psych angle, but I don't think there's too many options in the UK for that - it's only really USA that has clear pathways for that afaik

Final option is working for some meme consultancy and doing corporate away days where you tell people they're "corporate athletes" and teach them to "train your brain like an Olympian" and other such bullshit - quite well paid, but soul destroying

>>149892141
Was just a dig at me because I did an MSc in sports psych
That's actually what got me my PhD role, and it was the PhD that qualified me to become the high-flying civil servant I am today, so ultimately it wasn't a complete waste of time/money
It's generally a bad career option unless you're a former pro though, wouldn't recommend it to anybody otherwise

>>149892291
looking good mate

this narcisstic neek drafting another dissertation or something? oh my days

Watching England India under 19s test since there's no other cricket on.
(available on youtube)

42 hours until test cricket

>>149892026
correct
t. Ben Dwarshius

>>149893432
be the cricket you want to see in this world fella x

hate it when there is cricket on

at bouldering, lads

>>149894272
You didn’t post this one yet, allow me
https://youtu.be/25WNG0VAZJw?si=f_HqPNLAND8DxgIN

Sorry if you already did. This is the catchiest

banger

even though it was quite an odd move for bard to do a mickey mouse phd he still had his chance to turn it all around, go to LSE and claim big money in the city. got obsessed with oxbridge when clearly not good enough for them and now just plays cricket, goes to the odd stag do and bikes to lidl. what could have been!

Bard seems pretty comfy. Personally reckon he got lucky with the civil service recruitment officer that gave him the job, someone better qualified for that position would’ve questioned his dubious meme degree, but I digress I’m sure he is happy with his lot and wish him well in life and in cricket

>>149895598
Could have stayed in consultancy in London and earned a decent wedge but what's the point, £100k in London buys much worse quality of life than £43k here in the nicest part of England

Could pretty easily get an offer for Oxbridge if I wanted to be a student there (and so can anybody else with a first-class degree from a RG uni, they're not as selective at postgraduate level because they ultimately just want your money), it's getting a paid research job there which has thus far eluded me (although I came close, bet they regret giving the job I interviewed for to that fraud who STILL has no research outputs on the project, whereas I'm still getting regular citations on my PhD work)

I usually walk to Lidl rather than cycling, it's easier carrying the shopping back that way

>>149895867
Not sure any of my three (3) degrees are dubious meme degrees desu, although admittedly the PhD was from some shit former poly that shouldn't be in existence and which offered fairly awful supervision

It's a genuine miracle that I have 400 citations and a muscular h-index of 10 when I suffered such poor supervision
How can a professor supervising a social science degree not know what it means when two variables are negatively associated with one another for fuck's sake
That's literally GCSE level statistics

never seen the appeal of oxbridge me
I'd get it if you were a foreigner and wanted to experience the high brow / historical England stereotype but for anyone from here just go to London or one of the fun Norf ones, Manchester, Leeds, Newcastle etc and have top nights out

I'm a bit of a sucker for the architecture and Oxford itself appealed as the ideal sort of place to live at this stage of life, for various reasons

But I think the novelty would have worn off quite quickly

I did a short course there during my PhD and the tuition was no better or worse than what I received elsewhere (except for my ex-poly PhD place, that is, the professors there were at least familiar with the concept of a negative correlation)

Thoughts on calling the umpire "sir" at all times?
All the private school tarqs at my club do it

If you're gonna work in the civil service, it may as well be the provincial civil service
Don't quite think the £3k London weighting is quite high enough to make up for the horrors of having to live there (thoughbeit it can be a fun place in your post-uni early-to-mid 20s era)

if you run the numbers an estimated 40-60% of all posts in /cric/ history have been made by civil servants. truly the grifter's life and here I am paying their wages

Sometimes forget that people are actually born and bred in London, feels much more like a transient city purely for workers nowadays
Was saying as much to a lad from Mitcham in a Prague strip club recently
Think he wanted me to shut up so he could go and get a dance

i've said that to people before

very neeky thread

strip clubs at 32? bit grim mate

https://www.sussex.police.uk/news/sussex/news/court-results/arundel-man-jailed-for-distributing-indecent-images-of-children/

So that's where he went.

>>149896669
Wasn't my choice to go in but my mates (married, young children) wanted to go in and fuck a stripper
Suffice to say that, as a humble volcel, I didn't engage in any such funny business and instead calmly enjoyed my two "free" drinks while boring guys from Mitcham with my observations regarding the changing dynamics of London

>>149896694
think it was pretty much confirmed it was that on the ol reddit website a couple of years back
feel sorry for the other lad

Small reminder we are all going to be blocked from 4chan next week when the online safety act kicks in.

Brexit means brexit

>>149896095
Proper order. Playing juniors that’s what we were told to call them and at no point did anyone ever say it was alright not to

>>149896913
thought this was a meme but have already seen it implemented on other sites and you unironically have to upload your driver's license or take a selfie
absolutely shalln't and can't be arsed with a vpn which I think are blocked here anyway
guess the old trafford test could be my last. been on /cric/ since 2016ish

>>149897016
best hope is lots of websites just block us desu or force it all at the same time
when all the MPs suddenly can't watch porn without uploading selfies anymore imagine they'll be repealing it

>Day 2 of the 5 test match at the Kia Oval will be ‘A Day for Thorpey’
nice of them to honour an australian swimmer like that

>>149896913
>we
which mick do you post mate

pozzies laughing now but when we go this place won't last
just going to be them talking to each other with the odd jeet flag and sebshit

Personally blame civil servants me

If its designed to protect kids then whats the punishment for an adult breaking it?
>an adult accessed a site that we wanted to keep kids from accessing, let's throw him in the slammer

>>149897171
>t. pic related

may the door hit your arse just hard enough to teach you some manners
tata x

cric is OURS FELLAS¡!!

>>149897171
I miss early internet when it was cool Americans, Aussies, and Finns and if you came across anyone else it was some literal computer nerd

yepyep soime soime &
tabla x

>>149897558
4chan won’t implement it anyway but what the idea is that to access any adult content site from the uk you’ll be required to register yourself with photographic id as a user of that site for age verification purposes and to protect the children but in reality it’s because the uk has been compromised by mossad and it’s for surveillance.
There’ll be a way to trick it, fake id or something but they’ll still get the ip and location of the accessor for their analytics. It’s fucking mad really, they should be kicking off over there also hundreds arrested for supporting Palestinian terror groups and no election soon and even if there was an election fucking Farage is going to win it, they’re so fucked it’s unreal this may very well be the final game of cricket

Alex Jones is starting to look and sound like Stone Cold Steve Austin it’s really uncanny

>>149898110
i miss the days before eternal eternal summer iykwim haha

>>149898381
queem QUEEM haha haha haha x

haaaaaa

AUSTRALIA HASNT WON A TEST SERIES IN ENGLAND SINCE 2001

that's some bloody bonza of a gold standard moite

>>149898221
surely the block access to sites that dont comply

man, I love cricket

we hate you

>>149899739
that's a little rude, that was my first post in this thread.

>>149897171
I will be supporting the ICCs move to push cricket into the American market

>>149899772
it is what it is

>>149899789
I'm issuing a 20% tariff on all australian shitposts

GET READY FOR A BRO'EN FOOKING ARM INNIT

>>149900350
bairstows stumping really broke them

>>149900350
bairstows run out really broke them

this mm6 margiela t shirt is a bit disappointing. feels and looks cheap. the acne studios jeans are great though, really comfortable and fit perfect.

>>149898221
we're getting btfo
>YouTube should give videos made by channels like the BBC, ITV and Channel 4 more promotion to help tackle a "serious threat" to the UK's public service broadcasting, according to media regulator Ofcom

>>149896694
I wouldnt trust anyone with hair like that

>>YouTube should give videos made by channels like the BBC, ITV and Channel 4 more promotion
They already do they get shoved in your face

Genuinely kept having dreams about watching (not playing in, or winning necessarily) the Ashes with people. Just very pleasant cricket dreams.

>>149900350
has there ever been a scary English cricketer?

>>149900663
Children are scared of Crawley

Been on /cric/ since the 2013 Ashes. Putting the Brown Chef hex on during Broad’s ten-fer at Durham. The Watson pasta. I know everything about cricket, no seriously….
Good times

>>149900663
peter roebuck

>>149900663
Geoffrey Boycott

>>149900718
what flag are you guys going to post under once you become VPN andys?

>>149900808
Australian

i like t20

Just woke up in my flat

Playing for the 2nds again this weekend. Probably going to bitch and moan about it all week, and then talk up my performance after the game.

wanking to bouldering

>>149899061
Ofcom, the regulator, is weak a nuns piss, they won’t do shit. They never clamped down on gb news despite their constant rule break.
>>149900489
Is above. They should be clamping down on YouTube, if you go on their you get hundreds of recommendations for scammers and disinformation “news” from far right freaks.

>>149900894
kek this is LITERALLY me

Won't have any excuses* if I do get picked for 2s but end up failing again, because the team they're against this week is pretty ordinary by all accounts

*Obviously I'll find an excuse, thinking that I'll probably blame the pitch for keeping low

>thread already at 430 with no cricket having been played
blog brothers “working” overtime I see.

Pears vs Bears in less than two hours
Moist with anticipation
It's a must win game (but a Kookaburra ball again I believe, so a draw looks)

how come none of the english players have been injured so far this series?
i was promised injuries ahead of the ashes

*Looms

l want to get a crack and sack wax done but i’m so afraid i’ll get a stiffy when they touch my penis and it will be so embarrassing

why do you need a crack and sack?
and if its because youve got a misso, why would you be worried about getting a stiffy in front of a stranger?

>>149900974
Bashir is injured you cretin. Atkinson, Stone, and Wood are also all recovering from injuries and hence not picked for any games.

lmao at pozzies making b8 posts
>n..n..no pommie is scaring
>shit scared of Archer
>was shit scared of Botham
>was shit scared of Snow
>still scared of Larwood and Jardine.

>>149901050
all shit

Woakes and Carse will probably (hopefully, in case baz and ben are actually tempted to take them to and play them in poz) get injured the way they've been used this series.

The Z in Zachy B stands for Zionist

>>149901062
@UKCCIS, this guy hasn't proved he's over 18

Reckon Lyon should do predictions every time of which England players are having their careers ended like McGrath used to do with 5-0
>Stokes
>Woakes
>Archer
>Pope
>Wood
>Crawley

If Crawley even makes one century down under then his pathetic career is safe, and he probably will on an first innings road at Adelaide. Similar with Pope.

I doubt they'll even take Wood and Woakes, they're so past it they're practically done anyway. The bazball suck-ups went on about Woakes at Egbaston and Lord's ("its his home ground", "he averages 12") but didn't really do much. You can't expect him to bowl long spells and there is already an "all-rounder who makes thinks happen with short spells" in Stokes for it to really be justified in picking Woakes as well.

Archer will breakdown again and that'll be it, will be sad by unfortunately I suspect that's what will happen. Should send him back down to Sussex to play another county game before picking him for the Oval (even if that does mean him playing Essex).

Heard some thing recently how Aussie are going to give Konstas room to grow like Crawley got from England.
Really hope that isn't the case.

the last time australia won an ashes series in england the twin towers were standing

>>149901262
fuck, must've been ages since we've held the ashes then right?

what is it with old administration figures and liking to watch young men "to grow"

>>149901176
I remember them taking Tremlett, Bresnan and Boyd Rankin, all carrying knocks, because le tall bowlers are required

Konstas should play shield start of season and make it known to him and all the other openers in shield cricket that there’s a spot up for grabs, see how he handles it (and then they’ll pick him anyway for reasons)

khawaja should be sent to guantanamo bay

Whittakers chocolate is no good. I try to buy local and buy Aus/NZ owned brands where possible but i won’t be buying it again

Used to buy Italian tinned tomatoes because the Australian ones weren’t good quality. There’s a point where you have to not support locals if it’s too shit they’re taking advantage of your good will and should improve their product if they want to stay in business

>>149901050
>Stone and Wood
extremely overrated beer

/COUNTY/ Championship, round 11 day 1:

>Division One

Hampshire v Nottinghamshire
https://youtu.be/R2onEEwEmig

Somerset v Durham
https://youtu.be//Lsz1nYcUPuY

Sussex v Essex
https://youtu.be/o0XO37C777U

Warwickshire v Worcestershire
https://youtu.be/5JdJqLp7YNo

Yorkshire v Surrey
https://youtu.be/I1FwpSQ_4Ug


>Division Two

Derbyshire v Leicestershire
https://youtu.be/CX9wXPpxhTs

Glamorgan v Kent
https://youtu.be/lYF_W2vO7Q8

Gloucestershire v Lancashire
https://youtu.be/71RreyowroA

Middlesex v Northamptonshire
https://youtu.be/mp4UgV-AdVg

>>149901470
thanks

based countyGOD ruling this poomunity with a gloved fist

>>149901422
Which flavour? You're full of shit mate

Wonder if any other nations persist with this "it's easier to teach a rapid bowler to bowl straight than it is to increase the pace of an accurate bowler" angle when picking young talent

Always find it baffling that former Pear Mitchell Stanley is in the England Lions set-up simply because he can bowl 90mph+, when he's never actually bowled particularly well in any red or white ball match

Suppose it's a similar situation to Bashir being chosen purely on his action and perceived future potential rather than on ever actually bowling well
It'll be genuinely interesting to see how this sort of unusual selection policy plays out
In 5 years maybe England will have an absolutely elite team if these boys develop like they hoped, or maybe they'll finally drop these no-hopers and be forced to admit they were wrong all along and have been unnecessarily picking a shite side for years and years

Does Sussex have the worst quality stream of any county?

>>149901535
I've always wondered if having a fast fast bowler makes your other bowlers more or less effective.
On one hand, facing the slower bowlers feels easy after facing the quick, but on the other, attacking the other bowlers more is likely to lead to more wickets.

wherever yorkshire are playing looks a nice ground

>>149901535
Did I ever tell you the story of Saj Mahmood? It’s not a story the ECB would tell you.
Saj is now the cricket coach in a school near Perivale, as chance would have it. Might see if I can get the nipper in there when he’s older

>>149901503
Peanut Butter , the chocolate is waxy and low quality

>>149901573
Scarborough

Englands loss is Essexs gain. The return of the Cook-Porter partnership.

>>149901470
id love you to be come the resident threadtist
would need you to pick up some extra shifts though

>>149901585
sovl

That was fucking out then. Westley caught Hughes there, Essex should have appealed more.

Teams ranked purely based on their name:
>Lancashire (a crowd favourite)
>Derbyshire
>Kent
>Nottinghamshire
>Essex
>Middlesex
>Yorkshire
>Northamptonshire
>Somerset
>Sussex
>Glamorgan
>Hampshire
>Leicestershire
>Warwickshire
>Durham
>Worcestershire (how do you even say this)

$66 to go to a FC game WTF

>>149901714
Have you seen how much BBL tickets are these days?

>Lancashire
More like Wankershire innit?
>>149901714
That’s mental. I saw Shane Warne bowl at the Oval for a tenner. According to the Bank of England inflation calculator that’s £17.32 in today’s money

>>149901743
Thoughbeit I could go watch Surrey play Warks for an inflation busting £15.
So once again, despite the carping, London is better value

>>149901728
the shield is free at most grounds

>>149901695
>(how do you even say this)
Weer-ser-steer-shih-ya

why are they still here, fellas¿

GONE GOTTEM Cook gets his first. Makes up for missing porters, Sussex 2 down.

>>149901714
In general tickets are much cheaper than that, usually around £20 for most counties for the championship. Its probably a mix of it being an out-ground game, and its "on the day", pretty sure all counties have early tickets which are a couple of quid cheaper.

Standard memberships are pretty decently priced as well, especially for non-test counties.

>>149901788
lol

I don't like cricket

>>149901965
>t. zachy

>>149901714
>>149901865
considering how terrible the attendance is they should just be giving them away.

>>149902000
probably a negligee effect on attendances actually

Essex get a fourth, one for the newboy ahmed

Problem is is that technically the clubs aren't representatives of the county cricket boards, they are separate and are operating as businesses (although most are owned by the members and don't have large single shareholders). I assumed that in Australia it was the other way round and that the Shield teams were just the representatives of the state cricket associations.

Poor attendances for the championship isn't new anyway, been that way since the 60s. Its why the one day cricket was introduced and later the t20.

>>149902000
looks like theres a couple thousand there, not bad for a tuesday morning

>>149902095
scarborough is a holiday destination and a lot of old people just go there without thinking what they'll do for the day.

>>149901977
I wish

>>149902003
it's more just charging them to sit there as they torturously watch part timers trundle away for 8 hours is extremely immoral

no one should have to pay for that

>>149902195
some go to games with people they know mate

Amo are getting belted. Just not fair.

>>149902206
yeah to discuss off-topic

now the hundred, now there's a tournament worth paying for

>>149902262
what sports that?

>>149902206
having a hard time believing this

>>149902433
pick unrelated obviously

>>149902433
I stopped calling him Bitchwide Johnshit after that Ashes series. What a turn-around. Don't think I've seen a bowler from our side rattle the poms mentally as much as he did in my lifetime.

>le one good series in four man
I still sometimes watch the highlights of Lords 2009, superb Strauss hundred

>>149902494
>>149902494
>>149902494

big fan of Jamie Overton's 97 vs New Zealand but obviously that's his one imprint in a very large sport. mitchell johnson-esque, one might say.