>Be perpetual DM
>Long term campaign wrapped up because most of the table moves away over the years
>Time to hold audition one-shots at FLGS
>Some players too young. Others perpetually distracted or disruptive. Others boring
>Usually one or two players per one shot interesting enough that they'll get a private invite to a future long term campaign
>One person, let's call him Tim
>Engaged, clearly knows the rules, thoughtful, weaves his story with the others, reasonably good roleplaying
>He clearly enjoys the session and sends me DM asking when next one shot is so he can be at the table
>Bros... he reeks. He smells like unwashed ass
>The smell is so pungent that it's on my clothes when I get home
>It's Nurgle's chosen at my table, bros
>Not sure I can invite this man into my house
>Not sure I can tell him he reeks

What would you do?
He's a great candidate for a long term game but smells like homeless vomit. PSA to anyone trying to enjoy nerd hobbies: take a fucking shower and use deodorant.

>>95862740 (OP)
>"He's a great candidate for a long term game but smells like homeless vomit. PSA to anyone trying to enjoy nerd hobbies: take a fucking shower and use deodorant". Exactly that dm. Just a bit nicer.

>say you need to check your notes and music helps you concentrate but you forgot your headphones
>play this on your phone loud enough and on repeat
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o0xDGXotGIE

Whenever I do in-person gaming I make sure to take a shower and put on fresh clothes about 2 hours before game. I'm autistic enough to be lazy about it, but I consider game time to be sacred.

>>95862740 (OP)
That's a hard no.
If you reaaaaaaally want him at the table, straight up tell him that he needs to shower.

>>95862740 (OP)
Come up with excuse to move from table to digiltal

>>95862740 (OP)
"I'd like to include you, but your personal hygiene is extremely poor. You'll need to improve your body and wardrobe cleanliness before I can invite you to another game."

>>95863158
Sadly, I think this might be a deal breaker for me. So far I run multiple one shots which I don't have a problem with him at. I think the long term game might be a no.

>>95863225
Never

>>95863655
God damn. It feels wild even thinking I would have to say this to another adult.

Sandwich critique
Compliment
Critique
Compliment


“I want you to play in our private campaign you’re a great player; [list desirable attributes]

But you need to be well groomed, shower and deodorant

We would love to have you play if we can get on the same page”

Saying it in a nice way is the least effort you can put towards it and pay off sounds stellar if it lands

>>95866973
>God damn. It feels wild even thinking I would have to say this to another adult.
Someone in his life ought to.

>>95867023
I hate to be this guy but I could not disagree more. He sounds intelligent, poor hygiene aside, and probably is smart enough to see this for how patronizing this tactic (You're really just too fragile to handle the truth on it's own so I'd better make a big show about how good you are too to preserve your feelings) really is. I know, I know, I shouldn't criticize if I don't have my own solution, but it's an actual tough problem and I cringed a little just imagining this.

>>95866973
> God damn. It feels wild even thinking I would have to say this to another adult.

What's wilder, saying it to another adult, or not saying it and continuing to game with him?

>>95862740 (OP)
Show up to one of the sessions reeking of sweat. Have another player reprimand you and tell you to shower.
If he doesn't get the message from this axe him.

>>95867054
the alternative is just saying the shitty thing only without any nice things.
you're not lying to him, it's true. even if you can see that you're being given the ol compliment sandwich, it still works. it still feels a lot better than just getting shit on. if you're dumb you don't see what they're doing. if you're smart, you see what they're doing, but you're also smart enough to know that they're telling the truth about the good stuff too and it feels a lot better. it works no matter what.

>>95867083
"They called out this other guy for smelling but not me, I must be good."
this is a bad idea that will backfire. just use your words.

>>95867054
The compliment sandwhich feels a lot more patronizing when written out than when said in person. The reason why it works so well is it makes it explicitly clear that you're not just dragging the guy, especially if your compliment ("I like you as a player and would like to invite you to game with me") isn't bullshit or weak.

>>95867084
I still disagree. I've been on the receiving end of that from my boss and the HR ladies and it was absolutely mortifying, even it is less then ideal I still would prefer it if they respected me enough to say "Hey moron, stop fucking up". Maybe somewhere between >>95863655
and your idea, an open-faced roast beef compliment sandwich, if you will? "Hey bro, you're fun to game with but I'm going to be honest, you do not smell good, but if you can work on that I'd like to invite you to a regular game" I guess that's still sort of good-critical-good but idk it sounds more natural to me. I might not be the right one to listen to on this either, there is a good reason I don't work in HR.

>>95867138
if it happened in front of anyone else, that was the reason. this should be a 1-on-1 discussion.

How come nerds are typically not taking a shower or deodorant? I freaking love showers and baths. I usually take two of them in a day. I sometimes wish I had enough warm water for three.

>>95867083
>If he doesn't get the message from this axe him.
The whole reason guys like this have these problems in the first place is that they're too fucking retarded to be able to pick up on indirect social cues. If you don't come out directly and just say "Bro you stink, clean yourself up a bit." he's never going to realise.

>>95867083
>If he doesn't get the message from this Axe him.

>>95862740 (OP)
I just don't get how people like this exist. How do you go through life thinking it's okay to not wash your ass? I remember there was a guy like that in basic training when I joined the Army. I remember him because I was the unlucky private who was selected by the drill sergeant to go into the shower with him and physically watch him shower to make sure he was actually cleaning himself.

>>95867067
Option C: Don't invite him back.

>>95867313
depression usually
bad social skills, parents never taught them anything, too fat or physical problems that prevent them from cleaning properly also

>>95867313
pretty gay, not gonna lie

>>95867313
>>95867391
>>95867402
oh right, then you have the guys who are so manly that they think it's gay to wash their ass

>>95867413
Don't play the fool, anon
Watching another man clean his ass it's pretty gay. What did you do to deserve the 'retard caretaker' job?

>>95867430
no i got what you were saying, and yea the military is homoerotic as hell. you just reminded me of these other types of people

>>95867402
Yeah, it was pretty gay. That's why when anyone asks me "what is the gayest, non-gay thing you've ever been a part of?" I always answer "the Army."

>>95867430
>What did you do to deserve the 'retard caretaker' job?

Literally just randomly picked by the drill sergeant.

>>95867391
>depression usually
Can confirm because I'm that kind of person. I constantly worry about how/if I stink, but also have trouble forcing myself to shower. However, that usually means I don't even bother going out, like tonight, but then again maybe this doesn't apply to them since they obviously go out anyway. I don't know then.

>>95862740 (OP)
Learn to enjoy boysmell you judgemental cretin.

>>95863158
mega fatasses are basically unaffected by showers cause they have so many folds they can't even wipe their ass properly let alone wash themselves

>>95867759
Crazy how the rise in virginity and non-regular-sex-having came at the exact same time everyone started pretending they were really into stinky unwashed people. What would they know lol

>>95862740 (OP)
>>Not sure I can tell him he reeks
Just tell him, dude.
He messaged you, meaning you two have each others' contacts.
You can soften it by telling him he was a great player. But make it clear that he needs to shower and use deodorant, that you're not saying it to offend it but that his smell is too noticeable and you won't tolerate it.

>>95866973
>It feels wild even thinking I would have to say this to another adult.
No, what's wild is that no one in his life will just fucking tell him because they're too afraid of an awkward conversation. And will tell themselves they want to "spare his feelings" while more or less guaranteeing he remains a social outcast.

>>95867827
That's an US of American problem.

>>95862740 (OP)
>>95863655
I've had to tell a close friend to clean himself better. He's not atrociously bad but him and his clothes smell a bit too much like his unwashed cats for my girlfriend. I just told him to make sure he's 'washed and perfumed' when we met up once and don't hesitate to hand him a can of deodorant if needed. Look after those around you and don't make a big deal out of it (don't bring it up in front of others or use it as a punchline) and things will be fine.