People really read this then played it?

This is no different from 90's advertisements for Sonic and shit.
>John Romero is gonna make you his bitch
etc

>>96066151 (OP)
Not for nothing, anon, but as cringe as that was, it's almost 30 years old. Some dead horses are dust and bones by now. Just let it go.

Yeah, back in the day people used to read rulebook front to backe before playing a game.

>>96066151 (OP)
Unironically yes. It was a fun game in an era dominated by a rapidly stagnating 40k or hideously imbalanced whfb. I've got fond memories of pulling all kind of shady shit with my Cryx, particularly the Witch Coven and their Mist spell. So many enemy casters met their end at the hands of my seethe when they thought they where safe behind cover.

you're painting tiny little figures. it's a neat hobby but fucking hell that's a hard one to spin as macho.

>>96066251
idk anon, you just had to be there
>This game WILL RIP your head off and SHIT FUN down your neck

now it's all about feigning aloofness and choosing which political landmines to step on

>>96066151 (OP)
>People really read this then played it?
Who wouldn't? After reading that, now I want to.

>>96066151 (OP)
The whole thing is most likely satirical about the tournament waacfag nature of Warmachine, but you just know that autists being autists took that page seriously and probably even quoted it.

>>96066151 (OP)
It's cringey as fuck and pretty much nobody thought this to be a cool text back in the day either. A d their take on quality miniatures "made for modelling" is just a joke. Warmachine always looked like soulless AI slop.

Obligatory.

>Fuck GW we're different
>Speedrun every bad decision GW made.

All the people who thought this was cool are now the majority of 40k players

>>96066151 (OP)
what's the matter, too male coded for you?

>>96066151 (OP)
Yes, not having to play with people like (you) was the point.

>>96071330
>Stay true to P5
>Game flourishes
>Listen to all the crybabies that hate P5
>Game instantly dies
Curious, curious ;)

>>96072973
More like too soi coded. It's all performative. If you have to say you've "got a pair" you don't. It's that simple.

>>96074585
people that painted their miniatures and wore shirts without visible stains and that nearly fit them?

>>96066151 (OP)
I will forever be buttmad that they fucked this up. Warmachine was so much fun in MK 1 and 2. Warjacks were such a fun concept too.

What games ARE for sissies, little girls and nancy boys?

>>96066151 (OP)
Sounds like you're a wussy OP. You need to learn to play like you got a pair!

>>96066151 (OP)
I love how the opening paragraph openly calls out balancefags who always whine about this thing or that thing being "overpowered" or "broken". War isn't fair, faggot. Wargames shouldn't be balanced.

>>96066151 (OP)
The worst part is that the tournament scene for GW games took on this ethos and uses it to this day. Nothing but crude, rude, uncouth fat men drinking. It's a real turn-off.

>>96071330
Many such cases, sadly.
>>96076511
Just look for anything Japanese. Failing that, anything with a predominantly anime art style. Frankly judging by your avatar you seem to have the idea.

>>96076511

>>96069525

>>96076778
I enjoy alcohol and I enjoy games. People have confused being vulgarians with being authentic, though.

Warmachine really used to be true SOUL and was a great game. I know GW product cultists can't understand either.

>>96075589
>Projecting

>>96066151 (OP)
Human beings are fucking retarded

>>96076511
40k. Unironically.

>>96076511
TTRPGs

>>96066186
Romero didn't even like that ad, is the funny part.

>>96087020
Truth nuke

>>96066151 (OP)
Tricking nerds into thinking they're edgy and cool to sell them things is not a new move.
The current mode is darksouls inspired grit, mudcore, TRVE MTL PNX or whatever like sludge, t28, trench crusade, forbiden psalsm, the doomed, etc. with a weird dash of
>rules light
or
>streamlined
as corporate time management jetset lifestyle bullshit to mean you're so successful and busy you need your game to be fast.

>>96070487

Pretty bold to pick a fight with plastic miniatures in the early/mid 00's. Being able to buy something like a dreadnought that would have been a frustrating paperweight of a model in metal or scoop up a whole platoon of guardsmen in an affordable plastic box was really amazing at the time.

>>96087738
>40k
>Wargame

>>96095631

>>96066151 (OP)
In retrospect it was an interesting counterpoint to the usual "it's just a game, don't be a dick" advice. But at the time, all I could think was
>Just fucking say "pussies", you fucking pussies

>>96072973
The game's from Seattle anon, calm down. Every caster with a uterus was overpowered so I'm not sure what you're on about.

>>96070425
>you just know that autists being autists took that page seriously and probably even quoted it.
Oh your better fucking believe that actually happened. I don't have a lot of Warmachine stories because I didn't go to many tournaments. But the last one I went to in Lexington KY included the rule that all models had to be assembled painted and based.

So the guys on the table next to us are having a nasty game of Khador v Khador, and one guy is setting up his Behemoth warjack (a VERY big, fiddly, hard to assemble, pewter model) for an assassination run on the enemy warcaster. Which is a game winning play, for those who don't recall the game. So the guy who was about to lose, he compliments his opponent's model and asks if he could take a closer look. The guy says yes, so the about-to-lose guy picks up the model, holds it off the side of the table, and deliberately drops it on the cement floor. Model explodes, obviously. He then calls the TO over with a "judge, my opponent is breaking the tournament rules because not all his models are assembled."

And the TO upheld that, and gave the guy the win. And after the tournament was over people were congratulating him on using cutthroat tactics to win. I refused to attend another tournament after that. THAT'S the sort of person who played Warmahordes and took Page 5 seriously.

>>96102193
Things that never happened/10

>>96071330
Eh. PP had a fairly long run for what they were. Most companies like that won't last half as long.

>>96102229
You are, of course, free to believe that. Your belief is not necessary and will not change what already happened.

>>96102193
I've heard warhammer 40k guard players go "FOR CADIA" before but that's in good fun. But this is a totally different beast.
Was there more than just that awful page that condemned the WarmaHordes community?

>>96102278
Any tournament focused game community is going to be 100% cancer. Competitive games breed shitty behavior.

>>96066151 (OP)
You weren't alive in the 90s, you wouldn't get it.
>>96066186
Don't forget edgy American kirby
>HE'S ONE TOUGH CREAMPUFF
https://youtu.be/TAo-kYb8ebc

>>96076821
Seething nonce detected

>>96066151 (OP)
Some did. Most people skipped over it (as most people do with most of the rule book).

It was a little cringe, but in a fun way. It was a simpler time when you were allowed to enjoy things without worrying what strangers on the Internet would think of you.

>>96102193
Holy shit no way. The Rusty Scabbard in Lexington? 2008 right? The tournament for the Legends release? I was AT that fucking tournament, I remember that guy pulling that shit. Dylan Michaels was the TO, it was his first tourney he was HQ and he was so far out of his depth it stopped being funny about the 2nd round. The guy who """dropped""" the mini wasn't a local. He was part of a group that drove down from Louisville and Dylan didn't think he could kick the guy since he hadn't technically broken any rules. Yeah his group was a bunch of tryharding cunts. Sorry you saw that happen man.

>>96102945
>name drops the TO
>but not the piece of human garbage deliberately destroying peoples models

jesus fucking christ at least whore awards never got that fucked in canuck land (that I know of)

>>96102193
Please tell me he got sockjacked.

>>96102193
Why didnt the other guy just grab that fag's warcaster and throw it across the room then?

>>96103671
The TO was local to me. The guy who broke the model wasn't.

>>96102521
>a simpler time when you were allowed to enjoy things without worrying what strangers on the Internet would think of you.
Sounds awful, actually.

>>96102193
I don't believe that someone playing a game so anal about measurements agreed to let someone pick up one of their models off the table. That's like giving free Apparition to your opponent's entire army. Otherwise good story, though, would rage again/10

>>96102945
>The Rusty Scabbard in Lexington? 2008 right? The tournament for the Legends release?
That's exactly the one I was referring to. Thank God where wasn't a second example of this happening. Small world, yeah? I was one of the guys who carpooled in from Bowling Green.

>>96110110
The practice then was to put 3-4 dice around the perimeter of the mini base, touching it, then pick up the mini. When you put it back, as long as each die is touching the base edge, you're back where you started to a fine enough margin of error that nobody bitched.

I just didn't think it was relevant to mention when I told the story.