Thread 11446456

Daylight come and me wan' go home...

Welcome to the Army Men General!

Previously: >>11418693

>Plastic soldiers, knights and pirates, cowboys and indians, fantasy and sci-fi, cops and zombies, all are welcome here!

>Archived threads:
https://archive.palanq.win/toy/search/subject/Army%20Men%20General/

>Army men wargame rules:
https://combatstorm.com/
https://onepagerules.com/portfolio/one-off-games/
https://www.plasticcommand.com/
https://freewargamesrules.fandom.com/wiki/Special:Search?query=army+men

>Places to get army men:
https://bmctoys.com/ and https://victorybuy.com/
https://www.armiesinplastic.com/
https://www.toysoldierco.com/
https://www.classictoysoldiers.com/
https://www.toysoldiersdepot.com/
https://www.hobbybunker.com/
https://www.michtoy.com/
https://www.toysoldierhq.com/
https://micshaunscloset.com/
http://www.expeditionaryforce.com.sg/

Kicking off the new thread with another review, this time a 40 maplebucks set off Amazon; kinda disappointed they slapped a bunch of info stickers over the artwork, tried peeling them but is a lost cause.

>>11446533
My reason for getting this set is quite simple: it's an accessories pack that incidentally also has army men. No less than 8 of these sprues; admittedly they're not the greatest in that the tiny tent and pair of sandbag walls are hardly useful for regular army men (though would work with 1/72 decently) but I was mainly interested in the wall pieces. Interestingly they've omitted the third wall piece that usually accompanies the other two but more wall pieces in general that can interconnect is what I was going for - did a new Colour Wars chapter yesterday that will be rolling out sometime soon and a few more of these would've been handy.

>>11446546
Typical army men sets are frugal with barbed wire - took me a lifetime to get the container's worth I have before I started trying all these various sets. This one has a staggering 26 pieces and they're pretty decent too, having five stands instead of three which was more common in the past.

>>11446551
The tower had to be assembled and I forgot about the little green flag that was hiding among the rest of the stuff; amusing and nostalgic to see the usual suspects in terms of the four flags represented; the plant piece in the background is almost an afterthought to have some token greenery.

>>11446556
Another area of frugality in most army men sets is fuel supplies - similar to the barbed wire it took a long time and some lucky scores to achieve the amount of fuel barrels I have today, and this latest addition probably just jumped it up by 20 percent or more. 27 barrels and 13 jerry cans, the good kind too that aren't just a facade without a back to them (typical army men fare). Will note that the jerrys have some flashing on the bottom but this can be easily trimmed.

>>11446560
The vehicle complement of the set is minimal, two jets and two tanks but I'm not bothered; already had them from other sets and for me it was all about the accessories above. Still, they're decent vehicles in themselves, though the white camo for the jets is a little unusual. I'm not so fond of those tanks either; the Tiger's barrel refuses to stay elevated on its own while the Panther's is comically short and tapered and without a muzzle brake. On the other hand they're at least painted and provide some visual variety to one's plastic military.

>>11446568
Lastly the troops; roughly 25 soldiers per colour in green, tan, grey and rusty red. This area is where the set drops a few points as the pose selection is haphazard, not a great thing with this particular army men set - green is missing two of the poses and both have an overabundance of the officer with radio pose.

>>11446575
The other two colours are little better but again the disproportionate pose counts are off-putting. As a whole it's a really good set, whether you're a kid looking for a battle in a bag or an army men enthusiast building your logistics.

Why didn't tabletop gaming with army men never become a big thing? Why is it warhammer?

>>11446786
I've seen a pretty active community out there, using various rulesets either commercial (Combat Storm et al) or homebrewed. Pic related I got off some forum somewhere of a large-scale wargame using army men, toy train, all kinds of neat improvised effects and pieces...

I'd be into wargaming some with my collection (bought all editions of Combat Storm) but I'm too much of an introvert to even try finding others heh.

cute
did you guys use lego to build barracks and playsets for your army men?

>>11446927
Not all that much as I remember, though this was due to having a bin full of wooden blocks for forts, ruins, battlefields and the like. Also cuz I grew up during the pogs craze I made extensive use of flippos, the plastic variants you would get in bags of chips - some of them had notches so you could click them together and they made for useful bunkers, towers, forts.

Think part of it was also due to Lego being its own factions in the various wars, often fighting alongside/against army men so they tended to keep to their own stuff.

>Tan strongpoint, somewhere not far from Nuked Town

>"Hurry up lads! Get back behind the line"
>"Private, lay down some cover fire!"
"I don't see any enemies capt-"
>"Just do it son, light up the grassline!"

>>11448207
>"Where the frack is HQ... fracking comms"

>between the cautious bursts from Tan machine guns the distinct burp-like noise of a heavy MG erupts, flattening stragglers as their terrified squadmates scramble over the sandbag walls

>>11448208
*puff puff* "I.. I'm not gonna.. *puff puff* I'm... not..."

>>11448210
*puff puff puff* "whhhheeew... I'm gonna make it!"
>"Good hustle there Private, you got through the easy part."
*puff puff* Than.. Thanks Sarge, was noth-wait, what? *puff puff* That was the easy part?

>>11448211
>"Look around you Private, how many men do you see on this line?
"Um, uhh.."
>"Check out our armour, do you see any that aren't gutted wrecks?"
"Uhhhh... oh..."

>>11448212
>"Astute observations Private..."
*puff puff* "Kil-Kilroy sir!"
>"Well Kilroy, don't you fret. The hard part is the most fun, usually"
"Um, y-yes sir..."

>>11448214
>"Fracking finally... Termite City, this is Anthill 6. We have sustained heavy casualties, our forward lines have collapsed and our armour is gone."
>...
>...
>*grits teeth* "Understood sir, we will hold them to the last man. Anthill 6 out"

>>11448223
>"Alright boys we're falling back to the wall!"
>"Gunners, keep up your fire and give your friends some cover"

>>11448228
>"You heard the captain, get a move on it you apes!"
>"Kilroy, Estevez, Johnson - we're setting up over there behind the building"
"But Sarge that's outside the wal-"
>"I don't have time for your lip Estevez, we are going to hold that building against whatever comes and kill the hell out of it!"

>>11448230
>*BOOM BOOM BOOM*

>multiple mortar rounds detonate among the retreating men, cutting off the Sergeant (and most of his head) in mid-speech

>>11448231
>as the frazzled survivors scramble over the rubble of a breach in the wall the Captain notices an unnerving sudden silence behind him

>"Aw frack the gunners... poor bastards"
>"Get behind that fracking wall now!"

>>11448234
*puff puff* "Oh geeze they got the Sarge man!"
>"Frackin' A Kilroy, just thank your lucky stars it wasn't you"

>>11448236
>the quiet is briefly shattered by machine gun ammo cooking off amidst its former owner's funeral pyre

>>11448237
>"Oh man oh man we're going to be trapped out here in the open, we need to get to the wall!"
"Take it easy Estevez, we have good cover here and Sarge said-"
>"Frack Sarge he's maggot food now! I ain't gonna die out here for his glory!"

>>11448240
*gasping for air* "Aw shyte that was too many close calls, not sure I'm actually still alive man"
>*also gasping" "Take my word for it, we're both dead and this is hell"

>>11448243
>"Come on son, get over that mess and find a loophole, they will be hitting us any minute!"
"Fracking who, sir?"
>"You know who, Private."

>>11448246
"Aw frack this man I'm going for the wall!"
>"ESTEVEZ GET BACK HERE!"
>"I gotta go after him, he's-"
"He's a goner Kilroy, don't go out there and get yourself fragged too"

>>11448249
>as if to drive the point home, the hapless Estevez suddenly keels over and falls flat on his face, the source of the new gaping hole in his torso echoing across the valley

">FRACK! Stupid dumbass!"
"Kilroy! Forget it! That would've been you too."
"Get it together, check your weapon cuz you're gonna need it very soon."

>>11448252
>the last of the Tans climb through and behind the relative safety of the wall

>{A handful of scared troops, few heavy weapons and no armour and I'm supposed to hold this God-forsaken place to the last... right}
>"Alright boys, spread out and find firing positions along the wall!"
>"Anyone with an MG or noob tube, space yourselves out accordingly"

>>11448257
>as the last echoes of the heavy caliber sniper rifle that felled Estevez fade away, eerie quiet once again reigns over the vacated fortifications

>>11448261
>{maybe a dozen men left, might as well just blow our own brains out and get it over with}
>"Termite City, Termite City, this is Anthill 6"
>...
>"Termite City, Termite City, Anthill 6, come in"
>...

>>11448269
"There is no more Termite City, Captain."
>"Major Spearshaker? Sir what are you doing here? And what do you mean there's no more-"

>>11448270
"Wiped out, same as Anthill 1, 2, 4 and 5"
>"Wiped out... Fracking hell sir, you're saying that it's us and 3..."
"Afraid so Captain, Anthill 3 is still holding to our rear but just barely, they expect to be overrun at any time
>"Major, if the situation is hopeless we should pull out, save what's left to fight another day"
"Were it so easy, Captain. Although you can't see it, we are completely surrounded and there's no escape route that doesn't see us cut down before we get a hundred feet. So we will stay, and die here. For Tannenberg. For Tanganyika. For Tanzania. For all Tans."

>>11448278
>*whispering" "Aw frack this silence is driving me crazy! Why can't they just open up and we can fight it out"
*also whispering" "Deep breaths Kilroy, just chill. They'll be here any minute and you will regret those words real quick."

>>11448281
>the silence is broken by a deep roar of voices, the kind that sends power shivers down one's spine when you hear it (if you've seen The Last Samurai, the early battle in the misty forest captures this roar quite well)

>"Oh hell, I regret it already..."

>>11448286
>"They are coming boys, to your firing posts!"
>"Those savages can have this wall, if they can tear it from our cold dead hands."
>"Am I right Tans?"
*hoarse voices reply* "SIR YES SIR!"

>to be continued

>>11446546
Accessories are also a part of the Army Man "experience" and it's easy to feel shorted on terrain pieces.

>>11449734
Quite so, many a set I've bought over the years has been less than generous with one or more army men staple; at the same time there's also been some super finds along the way to make up for it. The liquidation centre that's been a treasure trove of Chinese Legos (and some unusual unsold Mega stocks) has only had one great army men offering that I've seen through the years, but man was it an excellent set - it had pic related as the soldiers (my first encounter with those, also my first ever white soldiers I think) and a crazy amount of accessories, base-building pieces, terrain... bought all five sets they had left and would've snapped up more, had they ever come back in stock. All they've ever had on the racks since is packages of the same crappy copies of the classic Desert Storm army in two lacklustre colours and cheap plastic.

>>11450241
Among other things it was the first time getting the stationary artillery piece and triple-mount Hawk surface-to-air missile battery in pic related, though everything was green in that particular set so it's been even more gratifying to find other sets that have them in tan.

felt like buying some army guys for a bit of nostalgia so I tried doing some research into the best brands and just checking through random lots on amazon ebay etc. and something weird I noticed is I just can't seem to find this "binoculars guy" that I remember from my childhood sets at all. I know sets are different and all but this is the only glaring omission from anything I've checked out. guy woulda been standing perfectly straight, kinda posed like pic related. these sets would have been late 90s/early 00s if that matters.

>>11451962
The soldier you've described and drawn rather well is from the classic Matchbox US Infantry set, widely copied, cloned and reproduced. 90s-00s is when I found them most often as well, since that time they've been eclipsed by other sets like the reimagined Timmee Vietnam War troops.

While you can still find places to buy the original Matchbox ones they're not cheap; currently I can think of one set that isn't that army per se but was reproduced based on them. The caveat is the set comes with three other armies, also heavily based on older sets.

https://www.amazon.com/Playset-Including-Realistic-Positions-Collectors/dp/B00BT5JBVY
If you're in Canookistan it's going to hurt some (I bought 2 sets...)
https://www.amazon.ca/dp/B00BT5JBVY

>>11451962
>>11452139
Among the various cheaply made dollar store armies you'll often find him and others from the Matchbox set mixed in with all manner of armies. These guys were being sold as party favours at a dollar-plus store, most of the poses are the classic Timmee Vietnam War set but they've randomly thrown in the officer, grenadier and binoculars guy from the Matchbox set, all at a slightly smaller scale to their counterparts which makes them stand out even more.

>>11446456 (OP)
They don't have articulation, they are statues

>>11452552
Weak bait but for argument's sake:
1. The definition of a toy does not say anything about articulation;
2. Some of the earliest toys found by archaeologists are the ancient equivalent of army men;
3. Nowhere does the word "statue" appear in the board-specific rules for /toy/, only a prohibition of "Japanese figurines"
Now that's been settled, why not hang out a while and enjoy the plastic action

>>11452562
Chill out man, I was making a joke. Are you ok?

>>11452571
Yeah, all's good.

>>11448293
Nice look at the tans

>>11453770
>>11453775
Awesome, reminds me I should look into getting some of those guys in colours other than black. They've been most useful for my limited attempts at forced perspective, in this case manning the defences of what is actually a very small castle compared to the standard-size men-at-arms advancing upon it.
>>11453764
Indeed, though Tans are a means to an end really, as will be seen by the conclusion of this little chapter.

On the subject of Tans we have a good example here of their battle doctrine, specifically a predilection for fortified outposts, strongpoints and firebases rather than continuous lines of fortifications.Their over-reliance on such tactics continues to be debated by Green strategists as the Tans, while not lacking individual courage and fighting ability, seem ill-suited as a whole for this style of warfare.

As shown during the stealth bomber crisis this system is vulnerable to infiltration and sabotage, not to mention the isolation and destruction in detail of individual outposts and bases (currently in progress here >>11448278). The leading theory is that Tan culture must play a role - they are akin to an invasive species that are constantly attempting to acquire more territory which would make the building and maintaining of fortified lines a serious money pit of time and resources when they expect the front lines to shift dramatically on the regular. Their outposts are typically uncomplicated and easily set up and taken down; sandbags, prefab wall sections, perhaps some barbed wire if they won't be able to go on the offensive in the immediate future.

Tan doctrine places much emphasis on tanks being their primary source of artillery support in both offense and defense, resulting in these outposts usually having one or more tanks as their heavy firepower, with the benefit of being able to go on the attack at short notice. While the Greens are burdened by their own flaws of military doctrine and thought, they have been adapting to the Tans' inflexibility and predictability to good effect; there is an operation in its final planning stages that will gamble heavily on these Tan flaws...

>>11454698
>the snapping of branches and rustling of grass stalks reveals the oncoming juggernaut of violence

>"Johnson, you still there buddy?"
"I got your back, Kilroy"

>>11454704
>with the growing cacophony of armour in the air, the grassline beyond the fortified line starts to change colour, replaced with a wave of shadowy figures
>Grey figures

>>11454711
The Tan survivors peer nervously through fireports, loopholes and cracks in the wall, anxious for it all to be over, resigned to their inevitable annihilation

>>11454714
>"Eyes on, Kilroy. Grey armour with infantry line out in front"
"Frack... how much armour?"
>"Looks like four tanks, could be more."\
"We never stood a chance man, that rat bastard General Gobi set us up for slaughter!"
>"Just breathe Kilroy, breathe and get ready to kill those Grey devils, all of Tansylvania is behind you"
*grinds teeth* "Wish all of Tansylvania was here on the line with me"

>>11454726
>the Greys continue their steady advance out into the open ground before the sandbag wall, not even bothering to spread out a skirmish line or using their armour as mobile cover

>>11454732
>the beleaguered Tans check their ammo counts one last time, flip off safeties and sight on the Grey soldiers advancing upon them, expecting to be obliterated any second with a single volley of tank fire

>>11454735
>an eruption of detonations and heavy machine gun fire blasts across the valley
>even expecting such an onslaught, the Tans instinctively duck and and screw their eyes shut, knowing when they open them they will be in the everlasting Dune Sea, finally at peace...

>as suddenly as it started the wave of violence subsides, returning to a different kind of stillness, one with a low background of crackling flames from burnt-out tanks
>across the wall, Tans begin to realize they're somehow all still alive, and even more inexplicably their Grey nemesis now lies in shattered pieces before them

>>11454744
>"Holey frack... Johnson are you seeing what I'm seeing?"
"I see it but I can't believe it..."

>>11454748
>"Those Greys got lit up hard! But, how... who?
"I don't know Kilroy, GHQ must've found some planes tucked away somewhere and thrown in a last-minute airstrike, or something"
>"Man I don't buy that, our chair force punks couldn't be bothered to rescue a few grunts on the line when there's glory to be won up high in the skies"

>>11454755
"Then it must be spec ops or some other formation we weren't told about, I don't fracking kn-"
>"Hold up man, you hear that? Something's moving out there, getting closer too"

>>11454759
>the grassline seems to move again as more figures emerge behind the carnage of the Grey force
>Major Spearshaker and the Captain quietly pass the word down the wall to hold tight but not to fire without orders

>>11454762
>the blurry figures coalesce into a troop of soldiers with tank support
>soldiers of a most unusual colour - Blue

>>11454765
>"Johnson, there's a whole other army out there! They aren't ours, they're... Blue?"
"Blue? Are you sure Kilroy?"
>"Damn straight I'm sure, never seen anything like-"
"Ok shut and listen Kilroy if you want to live through this. Whatever happens, do NOT fire at them"

>a few single shots ring out from the field beyond, jarring Private Kilroy

>"Johnson what are you fracking talking about, they're shooting-"
"Just making sure of any Grey survivors is all, keep that rifle safed, you got it?"
>"Y-yeah, sure..."

>>11454769
>back behind the wall, Spearshaker and the Captain direct similar orders to every soldier, adding that they just witnessed a miracle and not to spoil it with a careless weapon discharge

>>11454771
>peering out from their shelters the Tans suddenly realize that every single Blue rife, machine gun and tank barrel is now pointing directly at them

>>11454785
>for what feels like an eternity the Tans stare out at a strange army that just wrecked one of their greatest foes and now seems poised to do them the same
>sweat pours down Tan faces as the seconds tick by

>>11454787
Without warning the Blues about-face as one, tank turrets traversing to their fronts as they slowly start to rumble off into the grasslands, the infantry fanned out between them at full readiness but seemingly unconcerned about the living Tans in their wake

>>11454792
>"I... I don't believe it Johnson, we're still alive! Those Blue soldiers... it's like they didn't even care we were here"
"We got off lucky today Kilroy, the Blues aren't always so patient and merciful"

>>11454799
>"Ok you gotta tell me everything now. Who the frack are these Blues and what is their deal? And how come you know so much anyway?"
"I'll tell you what I know Kilroy, and believe me it could save your life again someday. I learned about the Blues the hard way and half my old unit didn't"
>"Wheeww boy..."

>>11454805
>epilogue
>Tan instructional briefing, subject: Blue Army
>"Over the course of our great war with the Greys we have encountered at times an army that was initially believed to be within the Grey Hegemony; Blue in colour, they are known as the Blue Army, or simply the Blues.
>"Subsequent investigations and fragments of intel obtained from the Greys and the Greens have given us a slightly better understanding of this force, though much remains mysterious about them."

>>11454824
>"The Blue Army was once under Grey rule but has seceded from their Hegemony, striking out on their own in a ruthless war against their former overlords.
>"Between observations from troops in the field and recovered intel we have ascertained that the Blues were forced to withdraw from their homeland and have established secret enclaves wherever they can.
>"These enclaves are well organized and they've established their own arms industries, fabricating tanks of unusual design and material that have proved themselves very capable in combat."

>>11454835
>"The Blues are single-minded in their resolve to destroy the Greys; they are constantly seeking out and waging war on their most hated enemy, utterly obliterating any Grey force they encounter.
>"More than once, Grey armies preoccupied by their conflicts with ourselves, the Greens and others have had to deal with a sudden savage assault by Blue stormtroopers exploiting their diverted attention to inflict serious losses."

>>11454841
>The Blues have not been observed to wage aggressive war against any other faction; they have not sought out diplomatic relations, alliances or even unofficial communications that we are aware of, certainly not with us Tans.
>All their energy, their mar machines, their hate is laser-focused on the Greys, a chaotic element on the battlefield that can turn the tide of a desperate battle one day, or lead to dire consequences another day."

>>11454845
>"Although the Blues will not wage aggressive war on our forces, by no means does this imply they will merely ignore us either. The Blues are masters of fieldcraft, camouflage and moving through the thick grasslands and wilderness undetected.
>"If you chance to see a Blue soldier, know that it is very intentional on their part and they are already well aware of your own presence and capabilities.
>"Never fire upon a Blue unless they have already engaged with you, though you will in all likelihood already be dead by that point.
>"If you get one thing out of all this, let it be the following: antagonize the Blues to your own peril."
>end of briefing

>end of chapter

>>11454064
That would work out nicely.

>>11454850
yikes

do they just not sell army men at retail anymore? I live in a relatively small town so I've only got a limited sample size but I checked big box stores, dollar stores, even a crafting place and the closest I could find was a thing of "soldiers" that were three times the size of the classic green dudes and fully painted. I mean I know I can just go on amazon and buy some there but I'd always just taken for granted this was one of those toys like yoyos and spinning tops that simply wouldn't ever disappear.

>>11456069
Army men tend to experience peaks and valleys when it comes to in-person retail availability; currently we're in a fairly deep valley all around it seems. The only places I know of in my city that will have army men on the shelves are Walmart (pic related) and a liquidation centre that's had a bunch of the same crappy soldiers for years that sell slightly better than a deep clearance Rose Tico.

One reason for the drop-off is the near-monopoly of a couple major dollar-plus chains forcing out all the awesome mom-and-pop stores in the last decade or so; couple that with the overall decline of interest in toys and army men are a casualty of the times.

>>11456069
It depends. I've seen a Dollarama (Can) on one side of the street and literally in one across from it have different stock. I got a lot of bargan MEGA blocks that way back in the day.
Ditto army men.
They also show up as "Party supplies" for some reason.

Is it considered haram to paint up your armymen? I'm new(ish)

>My birthday is coming up
>Thinking of buying The Corps army men tub
>Look it up on Amazon
>Doesn't show up
>Aw fuck no
>It's not available ANYWHERE
>Just last week it was, and now it looks like it was Thanos snapped

Fuck you, Lanard, you fucking hacks.

>>11467078
Personal preference, don't have the skill or patience or overall interest myself but I've seen some kino work by others.

>>11468074
Thanks, seems like it is such a specific niche with established boomer fandom. This seems to be just Warhammer with WW2 skin and no paint. Kind of weird to see that armymen is falling abit to the wayside while warhammer style miniatures are thriving. I have a starter knights set, I kind of wish they have more molds for medieval stuff. I'll try to paint couple of my knights and horses.

>>11456624
Very cool pics, what camera are you using?

>>11468213
It's a Panasonic / Lumix Dc-ZS70 that I don't use to the fullness of it's abilities.
I got it several years ago but the price really hasn't dropped all that much. (I found that out when I needed to get it fixed.)

>>11468818
Yes, the camera market have been in shambles since COVID. Manufacturers don't make entry level "serious" DSLR cameras anymore because they got squeezed by dumb zoomers taking pictures from their phones. These days new "serious" cameras are all >$1500 and the older DSLRs maintain their values because they don't make them anymore.

>>11468887
I had to pay $300 to get it fixed as it was 4 months off the extended warranty.
That's still cheaper than re-buying something like that.
Hell My gf and I picked up a cheap waterproof (seals are going now) for $125 Can. about 6 years ago. Now the same type is around $500.

>>11468204
Tabletop minis are just army men for adults, everything else (painting, form of play) is just the details. Toy soldiers are at a low ebb for popularity but they'll come back again I'm sure, they've endured for thousands of years in one form or another and there will always be someone looking to play general to a little army.

>>11469544
Damn. I was going to post an epub of Little Wars...

>>11470599
Feel free, there's links to army men wargaming rulesets in the OP.

>>11470733
it didn't like any of the copies I have.

>>11470960
Oh, that might be from the changes made after the site hack earlier this year, though I'm not sure /toy/ was ever a board where you could upload pdfs or epubs previously.

>>11470964
That's what I was thinking.
/tg would probably be a better bet...
But
https://ia600106.us.archive.org/33/items/littlewarsgamefo00well/littlewarsgamefo00well.pdf

>>11471473
Much obliged anon.

>>11469544
>they've endured for thousands of years in one form or another
Yeah but the molds kind of need to be updated. WW2 is soon fading out from cultural memory. We need more up-to date tacticool army-men carrying modern assault rifles, artillery etc., some drones and other modern warfare tools

>>11472952
We do have more modern army men, even futuristic; the issue is most companies producing army men are operating on the cheap, re-using the same molds or copies of molds that were manufactured decades ago, with little to no regard for the era of the soldiers themselves. This has been the modus operandi of most army men manufacturers for a long time and given that we're in a dip of army men popularity it may be some time before they're willing to take risks on new pose sets with contemporary weapons and gear.