Thread 712591008

Java: Protestantism -
Unmodded Java: Mainline Protestants
Modded Java: Evangelicals

Legacy Console: Orthodoxy -
communion of the Xbox, Playstation, and Nintendo autocephalous churches, all under a common tradition.

Bedrock: Catholicism -
Pocket Editon - Latin Church
Xbox, Playstation, Nintendo Bedrock releases - Eastern Catholic Churches (all broke off from their legacy console communions to join the Bedrock pontiff)

>>712591008 (OP)
i didn't understand any of that, i havn't really played minecraft since alpha or whatever when you had a small cube of a map you could dig out or freely flood out if you wished.

just wasn't that interesting outside of fucking around for a few hours.

Java Edition – Protestantism
Key Themes: Decentralization, Personal Interpretation, Reformation, Fragmentation

Java Edition is the original revelation — the "Scripture alone" of Minecraft. It emerged unbound by consoles or monetization systems, much like how early Protestant reformers sought freedom from ecclesiastical hierarchy.

Unmodded Java = Mainline Protestantism
Adheres to the core text (vanilla Minecraft), trusting that the original design is sufficient for a fulfilling experience.

Emphasizes stability, ethics, and tradition within the bounds of reform.

Examples: Methodism, Lutheranism, Presbyterianism — not flashy, but deep and enduring.

Modded Java = Evangelicalism / Non-Denominationalism
Believes that a personal relationship with the code (or the Creator) is central.

Embraces a highly individualized experience: magic systems, space travel, industrialization, new dimensions.

Modpacks are like evangelical megachurches — dynamic, immersive, and often overwhelming.

Just as Evangelicals vary widely in beliefs, modded servers can be anything from hardcore realism to anime roleplay.

Java's gift is freedom — and with that, a thousand servers and doctrinal interpretations. Some call it chaos. Others, reformation.

Legacy Console Edition – Eastern Orthodoxy
Key Themes: Tradition, Autocephaly, Conservatism, Discontinuity with Modernization

Legacy Console editions were regional churches bound to their hardware: Xbox 360, PS3, Wii U — each one operating semi-independently but sharing a liturgical structure (i.e., interface, update cycles, and game mechanics). Like Orthodoxy, they:

Emphasized ritual consistency — everything from crafting interfaces to tutorial worlds followed strict templates.

Received occasional updates from 4J Studios (their “Patriarchate”), but the timeline was often irregular and eventually ceased altogether — much like some Orthodox churches’ resistance to modernization.

Maintained spiritual distinction from the Bedrock Church, refusing to adopt its universalizing codebase.

These were autocephalous churches, unique in culture yet united in form. They were never meant to reform — only to preserve.

Bedrock Edition – Roman Catholicism
Key Themes: Universality, Central Authority, Tradition with Innovation, Synodality

Bedrock Edition represents the Catholic Church: one universal version, governed from a centralized seat of authority — Mojang/Microsoft (aka, the “Vatican of Code”). All platforms — mobile, PC, console — are brought into communion under one codebase and rule set.

Pocket Edition = Latin (Roman) Rite
The original form of Bedrock, like the Latin Church, started in humble circumstances — the small, minimalistic Pocket Edition.

Over time, it became the foundation of Bedrock theology — everything else is built on this original rite.

From mobile beginnings, it now defines the core of Bedrock liturgy.

Bedrock Console Ports = Eastern Catholic Churches
Formerly part of the Legacy Console Orthodox Communion, these churches (Xbox One, PS4, Switch) entered into full communion with Bedrock.

They retain platform-specific quirks (custom UI, local performance issues), but accept the universal doctrines of Bedrock: the Marketplace, Realms, crossplay.

Like the Maronite or Ukrainian Catholic Churches, they maintain tradition while acknowledging the authority of the Bedrock "pontiff."

Bedrock is one, holy, catholic, and cross-platform. It is the church of Marketplace indulgences, the Realms confessional, and the unified codebase

>>712591524
Why don't you try playing the actual game?

>>712591008 (OP)
What’s the Gnostic one?

>>712596329
Minecraft Dungeons works for the non-Christian groups that pretend to be Christian, like Mormons or Jehovah's Witnesses.

>>712597670
Oof

>>712593661
Why don't you suck deez nuts?

>>712591008 (OP)
>The OG is the one that split off several years after the fact
Do protties really?

>>712599356
Having Java as Protestant and Bedrock as Catholic best mirrors their playstyles and structure even if the timeline doesn't quite match. Java is the one that is less centralized and gives more freedom, while Bedrock is much more controlled top down

>>712591008 (OP)
so called christfags would do anything except step foot into a church.

>>712599114
Bruh moment

Xbox 360 is Orthodox, nice

everytime i see this gay copypasta i just want to know what the shader with the oulines in the op image is called

>>712591008 (OP)
Obviously Java is Catholic.

Protestant is every mod ever.

>>712604567
Then what is Bedrock and Legacy Console?

Bump

>>712591008 (OP)
Would the 3DS version be Arianism?

>>712591008 (OP)
>Redeemed zoomer thread
Lol

What's Judaism?

>>712608285
Infiniminer

>>712608148
No, because 3DS Minecraft is still true Minecraft. Making it Oriental Orthodox works for this analogy. Arianism, along with other psuedo-Christian cult groups like Mormons, work as Minecraft Dungeons or Minecraft Story Mode.

>>712610274
Ok, but putting your opinions with if Gnosticism is legitimate aside, what Minecraft version actually works with the specific theology and ideas of Gnosticism etc. material world being evil, two gods, salvation through knowledge, Sophia

Hi :3

>>712612762
Hi Lila

>>712612762
Hi Lila!

>>712591008 (OP)

Cave Game: The disorganized and widely disconnected followers of the Apostles. The basis is there, but there's no dogma yet, and no one agrees on almost anything yet. Most people don't even consider this period seriously and its only relevance is as a piece of foundational history.

Indev: The first formal churches in the Levant and Greece, the kind that operated under the radar. Mostly forgotten about as well, perhaps even more so.

Infdev: The Armenian Church, the first to take a shape we'd readily recognize, the first to be suffused with purpose.

Alpha: Not yet accepted in Rome, still broadly discriminated against, but growing in power, some would say the best days were here, despite the hardships.

Beta: The Nicene Creed. Pre-schism, Constantine has adopted the faith. It's beginning to feel complete and realized. Not much has actually changed in practice, but you can feel it, can't you?

Java 1.0: Catholic Church. Fully developed. Permanently integrated with the Roman culture and government.

Java 1.9: The Schism. The Catholic Church goes on to make changes, while the Eastern Orthodox Church stays behind, objecting to the changes the Catholics are making.

Legacy Console and Pocket Editions: All the strange early, esoteric heresies.

New 3DS Version: Coptic Church, totally isolated, a time capsule that no one else knows how to deal with.

Bedrock is simply the same as the above, but it refers to the Roman Catholic Church in particular. Being the most centralized, most official

Post Java 1.9: Various flavors of Protestant. Most are adding or changing superfluous things nothing feels coherent or well integrated.

Post Movie: Universalist, etc. The superficial elements are still there, but they're drowned out by so much extra philosophy and material that they barely resemble the original

Horror Mods: Mormonism.

Magitech Modpacks: Neo-Manicheanism. Basically, only the name Jesus Christ shows up at this point.

Terrafirmacraft: Quakers.

>>712614620
Based

>>712605006
Mormon / JW

>>712614620
This

>>712615631
>>712614620
>>712617117
Eh, it's not that great.

>>712614620
OP btfo

>>712591008 (OP)
cool church anon, did you make it yourself?