>1998
>opening the Nintendo 64
>plug it in
>put Goldeneye in for the first time
>kill the dude from the bathroom vents hundreds of times
>hit a triple jump in Mario 64
>tears of joy streaming down cheeks
>unbridled joy

>2025
>opening the PlayStation 5
>pure dread
>find Wi-Fi, dig up password, connect
>create PSN account
>no disc slot to put anything in, emasculated
>demands credit card information
>controller needs charge
>please wait while we download 130gb game
>maybe will play tomorrow
>it's time to schedule your colonoscopy