You will never be a real bullet hell. You have no micro dodging, you have no small hitbox, you have no real bullets. You are a cover shooter twisted by aesthetics and fake advertising into a crude mockery of STG perfection.
Gamers are utterly repulsed by you. Thousands of years of evolution have allowed gamers to sniff out frauds with incredible efficiency. Even fake bullet hells who “pass” look uncanny and unnatural to a gamers. Your invincibility frames are a dead giveaway. And even if you manage to get a drunk gamer home with you, he’ll turn tail and bolt the second he gets a whiff of your undodgeable, wall patterns.
Eventually it’ll be too much to bear - you’ll buy a rope, tie a noose, put it around your neck, and plunge into the cold abyss. Your developers will find you, heartbroken but relieved that they no longer have to live with the unbearable shame and disappointment. They’ll bury you with a headstone marked with your real genre, and every passerby for the rest of eternity will know a cover shooter is buried there.
This is your fate. This is what you chose. There is no turning back.

>Woah, did you get a GOOD synergy?
>Slow down, pal, wouldn't want you to breeze through this boss fight without experiencing every tedious attack pattern.
>But you can breeze through every other room, that's fine.

Also the way the game hangs when you're almost touching a projectile never fails to make me mad.

>>713769657
This, I feel like this shit was designed by idiots that don't play games.

>last few updates are all about speeding up the game
>but they still refused
to get rid of the dogshit teleporter mechanic that forces you to sluggishly walk through 3-4 rooms anyway and just let you warp to any explored room
I want to go back in time and methodically erase every member of the developer's family trees.

>>713769512 (OP)
The most fun you can have in this game is getting clone and killing yourself after the 5th floor so you can be broken as fuck for the clone run. Other than that pretty mid.

>>713769512 (OP)
>Thousands of years of evolution have allowed gamers to sniff out frauds with incredible efficiency.
Damn, trvke, I just knew I wouldn’t like this game, plus if I’m going in a dungeon I don’t also want a gun, I want magic or a sword, if I wanted a gun I’d play Call of Duty.

>>713770248
meanwhile the Chad Nuclear Throne just added 120hz support

>>713769512 (OP)
Every run is easily winnable, literally acquiesce talent.