Remember to toolbox any crabs that buzz at you edition

Last Thread: >>1776719
Last time on /ss13g/ - spessmen on a spess station:
>Christmas in July remains /vg/station culture as per server poll.
>New policy: NO Germans allowed.
>Lil Krommy is officially the biggest faggot in the janny team

>What is Space Station 13?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FHH1vfY6HTA
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nLAHBexJxrE
>/vg/station main site
https://ss13.moe/
>/vg/station wiki
https://ss13.moe/wiki/index.php/Main_Page
>New player guide
https://ss13.moe/wiki/index.php/The_Basics
>BYOND client 516 download
https://game.ss13.moe/uploads/516.1662_byond.exe
>/vg/station and the test server
byond://game.ss13.moe:7777
byond://ss13.moe:1337
>How do I connect to the servers?
Hit the cogwheel in the upper right corner of the BYOND hub and pick "Open Location"
>/vg/station forum and logs
https://ss13.moe/forum/
https://game.ss13.moe/logs
>Map renders collection & media server
https://game.ss13.moe/minimaps/images/maps/
https://ss13.moe/media/source/
>Coderbus, here!
https://github.com/vgstation-coders/vgstation13
@rizon #coderbus @rizon #vgstation
>If you want to report a bug or an issue, go here
https://github.com/vgstation-coders/vgstation13/issues
>If you don't have (and don't want to make) a github account, use the Bug Report button in-game (upper right)
>Nostalgia
https://booru.space/
https://ss13.moe/index.php/bans


>OP Pastebin
https://pastebin.com/raw/PD2yJjXh

HEAR YE, HEAR YE
SHALL THE MODERATORS AND ADMINS OF BEESTATION BURN IN HELL FOREVER!
SHALL THEIR CORPSES BE DEFILED AND BURIED DEEP, WHERE THE WORMS WILL EAT THEIR EYES.
SHALL THEY FEEL THE PAIN I DID! DOWN WITH BEESTATION!

The age of waifus/female statics? The golden age. Back then, even a ling round with silent round removal would be stacked, it was actually tough trying to get stealth kills because the station was that busy. In the age of the gay male static and the vox static, decent players don’t want to play.

>>1865611
>decent players don’t want to play.
i don't even log in anymore because i don't want my ckey in the logs for shitters to find when they're logdiving for their next grudge target

>>1865611
>players don’t want to play.
i don't even log in anymore because i don't want my ckey in the logs for shitters to find when they're logdiving for their next grudge target
the pool of players on the server is so low nowadays, that any slight against a powergay is enough to get a personal vendetta pointed at your back, until you get a ban request on the forums, all started from something trivial done to them 5 years ago

>>1865640
well, secmain is banned so this isn't likely to happen. Although, he's probably still playing on an alt that admins are aware of, and still logdiving.

>>1865611
>>1865640
the schizo logdivers have lost all their credibility so even if they did post shit about you in the thread no one would care. secmain in particular is a sad faggot who regularly begs the admins for mercy like a child (he's in his late 20's/early 30's)
no one should've taken them seriously to begin with but this is 4chan. people always fall for the 3cool5u persona

whys everyone so paranoid lol
either play or dont play

>>1865693
>>1865602
i don't....

i think more people should play, playing with people is fun

>>1865711
Agreed, especially in the early mornings in the US. It'd be nice to play with some people after I get off of work and not have to wait for a day off.

>>1865722
if 3 people are playing sometimes more people join but 1-2 is the same as 0

how the fuck do I play medbay avoiding getting in other doctor's way while not being useless and standing around

>>1865731
it's okay to be useless man. Be an assistant with the medical intern alt title and ask the doctors in medbay to show you how stuff works. Or just play doctor and learn at your own pace. You aren't gonna get banned or murdered for not knowing your job.

>>1865722
This is also when I get off work. I check, but even if I join nobody else will. My main contribution to deadpop is joining dead rounds with no power and no crew and calling the shuttle.
>>1865725
This is true if the other people just have no interest in talking to you. Sitting down and having a chat with like one guy is one of the best parts of this game for me.

>>1865731
Also, geneticist is a useless job no one ever expects to do anything, so you could try learning medbay duties from there.

>>1865737
Maybe I'll have to start joining in the mornings again.
>Sitting down and having a chat with like one guy is one of the best parts of this game
It's certainly a nice breath of fresh air from time to time. I think one of my fondest deadpop rounds was talking with the mime after she finished building a diner that was outside of escape, in space.

>>1865640
>whispers in your ear
>"lolcow"

>>1865737
talking to others is pretty difficult, i can barely type at a reasonable speed and pretty much freeze up when i have to do any sort of complex emote
trying to actually have a character on top of that is probably the hardest thing to learn in this game

>>1865747
I emote very rarely. Sometimes there will be a perfect moment for it where I feel inspired to do it, but otherwise I don't force it. One decent way to make distinct characters is to go by the 5e character sheet, where characters have an ideal, bond, and flaw. Here's some suggested ones from the archaeologist background as an example.
Ideal: All my exploring is part of a plan to find the secret of everlasting life.
Bond: I want to find my mentor, who disappeared on an expedition some time ago.
Flaw: I have a secret fear of some common wild animal – and in my work, I see them everywhere.
This last one is actually something I use for one of my characters, he will become terrified when a certain hostile mob shows up and will be totally unable to fight back. It's the little things that go a long way.

>>1865747
The hardest part of typing in this game for me is typing just enough to keep someone interested, and not typing enough to make a wall of text that has whoever i am talking to dismiss it entirely.

has captain chuck decided wherther yet?

GIVE ME VOX
VOX ME
VOX NOW
ME A VOX NEEDING A LOT NOW

>>1865731
Be the orderly. Try to keep order. Throw out anyone who doesn't need to be there (assistants).

Top ten juiced up waifus.
And the top ten juiced up husbandos.

>>1865758
The trick there is to make up interesting stuff that will make people ask questions. Mention your wife left you, mention some weird made-up lore about your species or background, ask people questions about themselves that aren't yes or no.

Security and heads of staff now have a chance to become antagonists again

>>1865768
security and heads of staff have a 100% chance of being fun hating faggots again

>>1865768
I missed this. Where is this change?
>>1865769
As if the past several years of 0% chance antag sec and command were angels.

>>1865772
>Where is this change?
It was a server config change. They still have a lower chance of being antagonists though.

>>1865769
>implying that doesn't happen whenever there's at least 4 security

just check the site and don't join unless it's box
works for me

>>1865756
i do sort of abide by the system somewhat, mostly by coincidence
i just think being able to communicate with emotes that don't consist of spam pointing at stuff is really neat so i'm trying to figure them out and get more comfortable with them, i wanna have a quiet character but not be a shitter who just refuses to communicate

>>1865801
>i wanna have a quiet character but not be a shitter who just refuses to communicate
librarian character obeying the library rules

nearly 15 years later and boxstation is still the goat.

>>1865826
fpbp

>>1865828
but it's the thirty-fifth post

Why haven't the last 10 VG ''players'' killed themselves?

>>1865854
why would they do that

>>1865861
Because VG is dead and the admins are absolute scum of the earth troons. The game is dead as fuck. I don't know why these freaks bother even showing up. Obviously it's because of muh discord, but it's not like the 900 ''people'' on discord play the game.

banning ourgirl was the last mistake VGpedos will ever make

Femstatics deserve custom-colorable lipsticks and eyeshadow. The red is too intense for demure, shy femstatics. We need varieties of peach, coral, pink, and maybe a dark blood red for vamp girls. Brown femstatics need colors suited for their coffee colored skintones as well, not just the trashy purple lipstick.

>>1865892
Anon, the sprite is 16 pixels wide.

>>1865892
i being able to get contacts more easily would be nice, you can change everything else super easily but changing eye color is 150 credits if cargo even approves your request

>>1865906
i forgot, do contacts randomly fall out if you don't *blink enough?

>>1865917
No.

i'm just going to say it. i am going to terribly miss playing my favorite static and i don't get why it was added onto another ban. i am not saying i didn't deserve the ban i received, i just really liked playing that character and now i have to write up another character doc

we should be nicer to yvvel and kromkar

nooo my heckin staticarino!!!
how are my metafriends gonna know it's me when I'm playing????

>>1865935
You click "Who" in the OOC tab.

>>1865935
it's not really that, i'm just going to have to change up the speech quirks and tendencies. i'm worried i'm going to screw them up a lot

>>1865931
sorry that happened anon. I've been playing my static since 2014, if I had to switch it would be very sad :(

>>1865933
>yvvel
sure
>kromkar
no

What if we were nicer to everyone, to each other.

>>1865933
men lie
women lie
strawpolls dont lie
https://strawpoll.com/61gD93E7zZw

>>1866036
People voted for Turnip and Rhydens.

>>1866036
>all those 1 vote admins
they voted for themselves so people would remember they exist, didn't they?

>>1866032
what's wrong with krommy??

>>1865931
Well leon, to be honest I do think it has kind of reached that point, ya lost the plot, you stopped treating the party like a cooperative game and started to fixate on your own character rather than as a member of a crew, you turned into a devious chaotic neutral among the many other based retards who turn a roleplaying game into their sporting event and ought to just be told to delete their character and create a new one
Maybe stunning the captain who got killed by the clown isn't the problem, it's that the players who stun the captain are problem players who want to be the top of the food chain and throw a fit when they lose it
Like a wise man once said - it's not the drunk drivers that are the problem, it's the drunk crashers who ruin it for everyone

But everything has to come to an end eventually, if you played a bunch of lowpop rather than prime time where there's more roleplaying rather than spectacle then the character might have gone on for a bit longer but still eventually retired by you rather than an admin as you simply ran out of stories to tell... but a week and a half should be a good amount of time for another one, go ahead

>>1865565
That one was an alright story but my personal favorite was before the soul contract nerf, this is about a decade ago

>Be business alien, drilling every planet and now have the ability to sign peoples souls via the dragonballs
>Start asking for everyone's soul I can, the second they sign it to me it's irreversible
>Soul contracts hold an insane amount of power, you can teleport each other back and forth, raise their BP to half yours or lower it to 1, leech their power, kill them to revive yourself, KO them, and anything you want
>Find these two who won't give up their souls no matter what, it's a future trunks roleplayer and his "girl"
>Beat them up repeatedly in heaven, they don't budge
>Bind them to hell, feed the LSD, and implant electropacks in their body to shock spam them, nothing
>Suddenly this Cooler looking guy rushes at me and attacks
>Know I've fought this guy many times and he's at my level and not a titan
>Fly towards the caves in hell, this should provide the perfect cover
>He takes the bait and follows me in
>Using my alien build I hit him with a time freeze, use the makankosappo through his chest and finish him off with a kienzen
>As he lays on the ground dying I use my ability imitate and absorb the icer around the same second to not be seen too easily by anyone clicking the sense tab
>Fly out of the cave and regroup with the two victims
>"I barely won, we can get him again next time but I think I need your help. Let me have your souls so I can boost you up"
>They actually fall for this
>Let Trunks do his speech about what we will do to beat him and what to say afterwards
>Use soul contract to knock them out right after
>"No, we say Haah Waaw"
>Morph back to my blue alien self right as I do it
>The realization hits Trunks and he starts screaming at me
>I fly away with more to attend to, my bitches forever branded with the mark of the ayy lmao

>>1866082
but just like /vg/station solo adventures aren't as fun as getting into it with your pals

leon

>>1866051
He's only strict to players he doesn't like
He hasn't played the game in ages but he still decides to handle half the threads in the forum anyway.
He talks like a fag.

>>1866051
he's a nonce

unfun shift.

>>1866222
the captain was a bit boring

>>1866229
so was the antag releasing sleep gas everywhere a few minutes in with minimal rp

total waste of a captain traitor roll

>>1866230
i thought that was the captain

Mcgee

>>1866330
free mcgee

>OH BOY TIME TO BRING XENOS TO THE STATION FOR THE GORILLIONTH TIME I WONDER WHAT THE FUCK WILL HAPPEN!!!
If you can't use maxcaps/shard to kill cultists then you shouldn't be allowed to do this gay shit either. What the fuck, troonmins?

>>1866355
>FOR THE GORILLIONTH TIME
Once a week is fine.

>>1866355
Xenos are the toe stub of all antags
>Always get shuttle called even when dealt with
>Heads of staff never want to risk a deathmatch
>People use the few times xenos win as justification to instantly call the shuttle before any chance for conflict to happen
Yeah the wait after an xeno victory can be a little slow but more often than an annoying xeno round will be rounds where we call the shuttle to avoid fun from happening

>>1866363
If you've never done it before and you don't know the benos can easily escape, it's whatever. But if you know what you're doing OOC, then you should be noted at the very least.

>apotheotic does more damage to pop than a shitty map

sometimes i wish you could make hypospray so itd be easier to make the sword

>badmin skews the votes
>breaks the fucking server
deadmin incoming...

>crashes the server to fix the issue
bros...

/vg/station doesn't hire their best...

;ADMIN OPS

didn't apothetic pay $400 to get unbanned LOL

snowstation is so fucking boring

do we need 3 fucking threads? last one isn't even on page ten for fucks sake. janjan's probably going to delete them all now

>>1866478
Nah, janny already purged the slop spam. He's a good guy.

>>1866082
that's absolutely fucking devilish

say vox out loud irl

>>1866492
can't, /vg/station has no TTS support

healthcare outside of medbay is kino. half a dozen people managed to survive fire wiz the other day because an assistant made oxycodone blunts

Now complain about the round.

No reason to complain. It was a strong seven out of ten round.

>>1865931
Because, you fucking toddler, taking away all the toys didn't work and taking away the toy you like the most is being tried out before you're banned from the playground permanently (actually permanently not just "appeal in a week because we want to look tough and want you to grovel")
Also, your character is "furry sex and also submissive" but not only is furry sex banned, you self-antag instead of actually being submissive.

>>1865892
UWAAGHH LOOK AT THAT SEXY 32x32 SPRITE!! SO HOT!! WE NEED MORE MAKEUP OPTIONS SO I CAN STROKE MY LITTLE PENIS TO THESE CUTE SPACEWOMAN SPRITES AND PRETEND I'M A REAL GIRL

kinda want to try erp to see what all the hubbub is about but im nervous >.<

>>1866633
Erp is boring imo mainly because of the people who want to do it. I think it could be good character development if people actually used it as a way to progress their character development instead of just being "fuckmonster #4087" which seems to be the standard

A truly nightmarish round in a good way.

>>1866714
eh admins need to learn how to give players some breathing space before spawning in the next antag. we barely got a chance to have fun with the divergent clone gimmick before the wizard button was pressed

>>1866729
For me the hog ruined the whole round, it just kept running into every interaction between players and made every situation about itself.

>>1866732
Funnily enough it all started with the randomly spawned hog being in the way of an escape by the vampire and his entourage after a radio shout. The round started to deteriorate from there.

How will the neverplayer cabal ever recover?

grey area and xidri is the only good femstatic

My metagrudges:
Joey Gourd
Smoke Maltys
Edgar Burrows
Jon Summers

>>1866784
tfw didn't make the list

>>1866697
True, the fact of the matter is that a good amount of people like to forget the last two letters of that... https://ss13.moe/forum/viewtopic.php?f=10&t=6194 The "fuckmonster" is ironically enough the result of people creating an excessively unique character as part of some sparkledog individuality contest only to turn into a walking farce like you say. Even old NC-17 movies had a plot to them, hell even rule34 has plot to it with how they involve two characters from the same franchise
I've only ERPed a few times in this game and it's with people who I know before via non-erotic roleplay. My most recent being in April on a Bay downstream as an IPC paramedic (humanoid positronics meant to be as helpful and harmless as possible) giving a massage to my sinta'unathi CMO (a very martial and religious group of crocodilians), innocently chatting with him about things (so that he's not just lying there) before transitioning to a happy ending even though it's not exactly something he asked for. We're still roleplaying with eachother as he's very obviously struggling to keep it together and he can't do much about his honor when my metal grippers are holding the most sensitive and tender part of his body, both of us knowing that nobody's going to believe the justification he tells the captain if he smashes his robot. It's no more than a few minutes until we're both done.

>>1866633
In that regard, consider the above: debauchery, STD's, loss of honor, jealousy, infidelity, prostitution, taboos - like any RP, it can bring up interesting topics with dramatic consequences. But the act of ERP itself is not particularly interesting: think of it like Lifeweb where the people who are there for le sexe time are also usually the "fraggers", these same people who are there to use the rule-less environment to see how much of a Quake killstreak they can rack up in one sitting. If you're in need of an erotic chat, you'll have a better experience at the phone sex hotline imo

>>1866789

>>1866794
You could dispute his points if you wanted to instead of posting a no effort reaction image like a fag

>>1866801
It's not that anon doesn't make sound points. It's that he went into detail about his inter-species "happy ending" massage molestation. This is why ERPers are hated. Most of us just want to play funny spessman game and not be unwillingly exposed to your furry rape smut, and the quality of the roleplay has no bearing on that. Furfags like you always seem to have some sort of exhibitionist fetish and you just have to shove it in everyone's face and go into unnecessary detail about it all. Please just stay on your fucking containment servers.

>>1866803
I have never ERP'd willingly. I have done relationship RP and some silly /me emotes, not once have i typefucked someone. As I said it does not interest me because people who want to do it are doing it because they get off on the idea of someone being interested in them genuinely rather than working on both characters story.

>>1866789
This is what people who play on other servers are like by the way. If you aren't exclusively playing /vg/station I'm afraid this is how people perceive you.

I ERP’d once with people from /vg/ and it was fairly boring to be honest.

i saw an erp the other day
horrible creatures

13% of admins are responsible for 50% of unwarranted permas

>>1866784
i dont mind being bundled with those 3 so ill take that as a compliment

lets erp

In order to apply for admin you should be forced to post a face pic, how much you bench, and a picture of your significant other. This will seperate the losers from the chads and make for a better quality admin team.

>>1866871
Why hire admins that can't relate to 99% of our playerbase? That's just going to lead to more bans and less unbans

>>1866046
What does this post mean? They’re not beyond reproach.

>>1866892
Rhydens is a cool guy and I don't think I've ever even seen someone complain about him.

>>1866896
hence why he only got one vote. whats your problem exactly? hell for all you know he might've voted for himself because he thought it would be funny

>>1866899
I meant to reply to the other anon. It's possible someone out there thinks he's the biggest faggot ever, he voted for himself, or someone just wanted to cause as stir. All admins have made mistakes!

>>1865931
Maybe if you hand-write a 2,000 word essay on the rules then you can get your race ban lifted

>>1866627
>taking away all the toys
>taking the most favorite toy
Not that anon but that's a bad analogy. Also I don't think toddlers play SS13, given that they're in the 1-3 year range and generally do not use computers at those ages, let alone stumble upon BYOND. Also, I have never seen the character perform furry sex. I know of a character named Skex which is one letter away from sex but I think that is the joke.

chemistry is pretty fun but you do just kind of get stuck being the medbay janny and no one takes your pills because cryo exists

>>1867164
have skex, spacecell

Sex with Skex!

cum from a bum

>>1867173
Make some pill box combos and give out to security for emergencies. Make narcotics.
I always try to prioritize chemistry job recruitment if there's already a doctor.

What if the admins were all secretly very handsome, single men?

>>1867334
Handsome men wouldn't waste their time power-tripping over an autistic Among Us ripoff gay furry sex game.

>>1867345
So I shouldn't even try my luck with any of them? :(

>>1867349
just go to your local gay bar, fag

>>1867345
B-but Among Us came out after SS13!!!!!!!!

How to approach a Vox for sex? I’m shy…

>>1867425
just walk up to f-
oh
nevermind

>>1867425
just come and start by saying hello! :>

>>1866866
where do you wanna do it? the trader outpost?

Honestly, I can't believe what I'm about to say, but I preferred the slopposter.

>>1867492
compared to who

>>1867541
Compared to ~7 posts above mine.

>>1867492
we all do

bug boyfriendz

VGpedo suicidez

>>1867612
do you ever stop

>>1867632
Says the pedo who had no problem with the last 30 posts

>>1867681
so how many slop lewds do you have saved on your phone

I just keep it vanilla and visit the Kemono thread on /cm/ in my downtime.

>>1866632
did they change floor sprites to be semi-random or is your viewport scaling completely mangled

>>1866632
That's literally how VGpedos think

the ss13 pedo situation is crazy

vox cum deserves respect

>improves the thread quality with her presence

cashe cleavage

>>1867811
>>1867601
Dragon Universe fan here, can we get a version of her going super saiyan? Thanks

Rug Buu is such a bitch he steals everything when he KOs you even if it's trash items

Admins speed run every round they don't like. Dude gets permabanned for antag speed running once. Unban my Man Germansanta

>>1867965
>Admins speed run every round they don't like.
Like every time Snow gets voted

>>1867967
No, there are logs. It's only one admin.

>>1867967
Also the admin in question fucked it up, had to do hard restart, and it restarted with another Snaxi.
And people played. It was fine. It was quite alright.

>>1867975
he did try to rig the poll, then had to crash the server to fix it. We only ended up playing snaxi due to the server loading up the last-used map after it rebooted.

>>1867975
>>1867983
>Does a poll on whether or not players wanted a gunked round or a normal Snaxi round
>Poll lasts like half a minute and a third of the server didn't vote
>He gives us a 17 minute round with 4 antag variants, including four nukeops of course
>Screws with the poll so people can't get another snaxi round
>Server can't be restarted even with admin buttons
>Decides to crash it instead
>Server defaults back to Snaxi and we actually get a good round (Apoth wasn't there to spam buttons)
It's no wonder admins and coders alike want to get rid of Snaxi. They're afraid of its power.

>>1868237
>>Server defaults back to Snaxi and we actually get a good round
ehhh...it was kind of boring.

>>1868237
one thing i noticed is that in the automated map poll 5 votes for box showed up out of nowhere seconds before the poll ended

My bank just got robbed on earth, had multiple time chamber keys and half a bil in there

damn /vg/station really treats newfags like shit huh

>>1868342
Newfaggotry is a mindset

>>1868342
nah, newfriends are always welcome, and they always receive help ic and ooc

>>1868350
that ain't been my experience the last 3 shifts

>>1868352
well, I wasn't online, I will likely play the next round
cya in space cowboy

john winters

>>1868237
Like I said. Yvvel has been on a warpath about how he hated Riker and Germansanta brought them there. Seems like his next target is Tug. Wouldn't be surprised if he bans Joey Gourd or any greytider/someone he hates after that. And now there own is doing the same thing. Fuck admins

>only one working cargo
>only vaguely know what I'm doing
>busiest roundstart I've ever seen as a cargobabby
>somehow orders end up in bar an dnot where I tagged it
>anons bitching at me literally all shift
damn no wonder nobody wants to play cargo

>>1868420
there's always someone in cargo

>>1868420
when you ship a crate you have to wait a few seconds for the delivery chute to ship out the crates. otherwise it'll just send everything to the location you first selected with the tagger (in your case it was the bar)

>>1868432
I know, I even waited for the chute noise. I don't get why everything ended up in bar regardless. I've never messed up that badly before.

>Short, cute and extremely top heavy! She stands at five foot nothing and has a pair of udderly enormous breasts which make finding clothes that fit correctly a nightmare. As such, most of what she wears is poorly fit or overly snug. She has big pouty lips, a kind if somewhat vacant stare and freckles all over. She smells like dairy and freshly cut grass for some reason.

>>1868478
what causes a man to do this

>>1868513
porn addiction induced AGP

>>1868524
Do you think he realizes this ain't the ss14 thread?

>>1868435
Esoteric cargo knowledge: The chute noise plays when the delivery cycle BEGINS, this is why you can dive into the disposal unit and the animation starts but the redshirt will still run up to click eject and you come out before you even start moving through disposals. It's quite possible that in your rush you hit the lever when you heard the chute noise initially play and the crates entered the entry chute before the first shipment actually sent, wait for the chute noise to complete before sending the next shipment, slow is smooth smooth is fast

If it's a situation like this where it's just you being a bad service worker then your best option is to just man the fuck up and DELIVER THE PACKAGE. I know the mail tube is goated but sometimes it doesn't work out perfectly, if it's the bar that's a relatively public area so you can hopefully just put all the crates back into the disposal unit there and try mailing it again, but if niggers are acting up in the lobby possibly hacking the mulebots and put them in the lobby with the remote to start siccing them like attack dogs

Also the real reason why nobody plays cargo is because the old players would rather play assistant due to the flexibility while also being the ones who unwrench the vending machine to grab whatever they want, meanwhile the new players start out their first actual rounds in cargo before quickly moving on to medbay, cook, janitor, botany, and since we don't get many new players... You can do a lot worse, some of the most smoothbrain welding fuel snorters wear the shorts, I wanna slit the throat of the simplemobs who return the shuttle while there's still items on it because he NEEDS his Electrical Maintenance Crate NOW
Also the ones who load everything on the shuttle, including the crates we just bought. I vaguely recall a line from BlackPantsLegion describing how much worse you can get: "They're sending the crates into space. They got the spirit but are a bit confused on the specifics."

>>1868478
i wish i had it in me to have kino flavor text like this
i am so boring

>>1868478

>>1868576
https://vocaroo.com/1dFipgI6dJ7l

>>1868593
>aislop vocaroo
yaaaaawn

>spend the whole round redecorating the ugly box bar
>never serve a single drink
>round ends
the trve bartender experience on /vg/

>>1868549
Cargo's for being the only source of guns when Security is being too authoritarian to let people have fun. They're insurance but it requires a sufficiently staffed Cargo that doesn't get bullied into submission by Security, or worse, have Security sympathizers that will refuse to let the greyshirt have his crate of stun weapons that he paid for. The only problem is that you need emitters to start your journey and Security will probably use the emitters as an excuse to get you canned and demoted if they don't like you. Since you're likely the quartermaster you can probably give a generous bribe to an engineer to unlock the emitter crate.

>>1868596
You should read it and record yourself! It would be super based it would!

>>1868612
i dont really feel like gettng told i sound like a faggot right now

>>1868576
>>1868593
just a normal space dweller

>>1868616
You sound like a faggot right now

>>1868625
you dont know what it's like to have a voice you cant use with anyone
i wouldnt post mine on 4chan anyways, im anonymous always

>>1868609
Really once you get into the esoteric cargo knowledge, accessing an emitter is kind of the easy part, one of those things that gets hammered out within 20 minutes. Off the top of my head I got like a dozen different methods to break a crate: IEDs, mining PKA, Dan's chocolate EMP, mutated cockroach from the egg boxes, siege cannon, a while ago I used to be a real nigger and steal the emitter from the research asteroid. But I will admit that the first crate you break is the emitter crate since they're just objectively the best method due to their throughput - just line up the crates and they pop one by one.
By that point (15-20 minutes) you'll have like engineering supplies n shit and probably know what the station's gonna want from you; the religious shit with holy water for cults, emitters and lasers for blobs, loyalty implants for revs/cult, guns for ops. But otherwise like 70% of the rounds where it's just traitors then it's up to you, which is the real hard part since you gotta pretend to be an adult watching the miner GPSs or teaching the fuel huffer cargo technicians and shit... Or you gotta do a GIMMICK so people don't think you're a boring player by like building a bunch of vending machines in the halls and watching as the redshirts chimp out and haul off the one sectech or mailing people crates they didn't ask for or giving the clown $800 worth of wormhole jaunters so they can jaunt into the captain's office or maybe turn the warehouse into a power plant or get a million fuse bombs cause you can buy welding fuel or give the greyshirts bags full of guns when they start complaining about security... yeah fuckin guns too mate always have some guns on hand to uh anticipate security needs. But when the redshirts arrive I keep the guns in the cargo tech locker, they've searched the QM locker and the warehouse but never the cargo tech lockers for some reason, you really do need guns cause cargo's very open and directly borders maintenance so grues get in

begone whore

>>1868674
first transfolx banned from VG

deadmin kromkar

damn what'd the paramedic due to this nigga did he take away his zine like the narcan coursing through the olfactor epithelium of the addict before they get up and start screaming at you for ruining their high

>Squird5 as a secoff sees two Larry Trovato's
>Without uttering a single word, he immediately takes one of them way for decapitation.
>Kharkov as a warden sees the paramedic holding a syringe gun
>He decapitates him in response
SEC SISSIES WTF IS GOING ON?

>>1868707
>paramedic holding a syringe gun
without any additional context, shooting the vox would be totally justified

>>1868342
Damn newfag, after I answered all your questions and even rescued your body you come here to complain that you weren't treated well enough

>>1868714
Rescuing someone isn't an act of goodwill though ragetard.

>>1866803
yea ok I probably could have phrased that better, I was trying to think of an example but it was like midnight and I couldn't think of anything else I'm sorry
But please stop it with the Seinfeld posting! I can't take it anymore!!! GHUAUAUHAHUAURHRAUGHGWUOURCFWXF X#BRLKFB LTBSLCF

im your little vox come and play with me

>>1868741
never post again, leon

>>1868742
make me

>>1868743
your next ban is going to be a non-negotiable perma

>>1868745
already ban evaded, nigga

>>1868746
no you didn't because you aren't even him

>>1868747
*her

>>1868749
what?

>>1868752
Her
She cute
She got them tum tums

Have you guys played SS14, it's pretty fun.

>>1868760
i'm not trangender so no

curious poll made 11 months ago
https://strawpoll.com/X3nkP4XWKgE/results

Who’s the most annoying shitter right now?

>>1868788
(You)

>>1868708
Unfortunately the victim was a hard working human man.

>>1866036
Should have done a cutest admin poll instead.

>>1868844
that would be a bomthar landslide

>>1868549
>your best option is to just man the fuck up and DELIVER THE PACKAGE
There were unironically 40 crates to send to 5 separate locations. Ain't no way in hell I'm delivering them by hand when one guy is yelling that he needed his order of 10 monkey cube crates yesterday.

>>1868714
Dunno who you're thinking about but that definitely ain't me

'ino

>>1868865
My man, that's what the tractor is for. You can load crates up on the cars and drop them off. When I played a lot of cargo, I would often just PDA people to come get their stuff, unless it was a big order placed by one person or department.

>>1868981
What tractor?
I don't see this mentioned on the wiki unless I'm missing something. How many crates can it load?

>>1868981
>>1868988
wait, there's a "tractor crate"?
Should I be ordering a tractor crate and a carts crate? I assume the tractor pulls cart crates.
Wish the guide to cargo mentioned some of this stuff

>>1868993
*pulls cargo carts

>>1868993
Yeah, the wiki is missing a lot of useful information. The carts can be dragged behind the tractor, and I think you can do as many as you'd like, but it works like snake where running into your own carts disconnects them. It works the same as the falcon, snowmobiles, and the janicart, so it needs the key to work. You can either leave the key in the ignition or hold it in your hand. I don't recommend having an absurdly long chain of carts because people will start screwing with you and disconnecting them.

>>1869001
Thanks for the info.
If someone is able, adding tractor/cargo carts under "Delivery Methods" in the cargo tech guide would be a good idea for retarded newfags such as myself. Hell, I might edit it after I play around with a cargo tractor a bit. I genuinely had no idea tractors & cargo carts were a thing, they aren't mentioned at all in any of the cargo guides. I think the only way I'd have found out is by looking through each available crate's description and then ordering one on a whim if I had a quiet shift with spare time/credits to fuck around with.

>>1868766
Who's leon454 and why should I care?

>>1869021
First real girl who has played on VG

i wish i was a real girl

post slop

>>1868797
>man
>Smoke Maltys

blast ripneck
damien debris
neville and his ayyy i cant remember the name of
that one CE nick that did 3 shard engine (weller maybe)
slate slabrock

>>1869151
blast still plays now and then

>>1869151
>ayyy i cant remember the name of
yahir kepplinger

im a girl

>>1869163
what server

>>1869168
sorry but you have no chance

>>1869201
i just wanted to admire and orbit from afar knowing fully that i am out of your league, but you do you i guess

>>1868865
aw man did you send the 10 monkey cube crates individually instead of consolidating the contents

>1 person on /vg/ station
and people keep saying ss13 isn't dead

>>1869221
It isn't. Come back in 6 hours.

>>1869221
it's morning/noon in the US, why would people be on now?

>>1869105
in this household smoke maltys is a hero, end of story.

Law 1: You are a real American.
Law 2: Fight for the rights of every man.
Law 3: Fight for what's right.
Law 4: Fight for your life!

>>1869281
Worst day since 9/11

>>1868865
By "putting all the crates back into the disposal unit" I mean clickdragging them into the disposal in the bar since you can do that - since it'll just go straight back to the sorting line you can immediately go back and try again, right?

// Telecomms Control Script v3
// Various utilities for controlling telecomms via radio commands.
// Usage: /setjob Eugene_Dexter Cool_Guy (sets Eugene Dexter's job to Cool Guy)
// /setjob all Cool_Guy (sets everyone's job to Cool Guy)
// /setname Jim_Barry James_Perry (renames Jim Barry to James Perry)
// /setname all Jeremy (sets everyone's name to Jeremy)
// /mutejob Security_Officer (mutes all Security Officers)
// /unmutejob Security_Officer (unmutes all Security Officers)
// /mutename John_Smith (mutes John Smith by name)
// /unmutename John_Smith (unmutes John Smith by name)
// /off (disables all messages from being sent)
// /on (enables all messages to be sent)
https://pastebin.com/z7vbngkp

ntsl was a mistake

>>1865611
>the two science troons that dragged each other around all the time to avoid getting antag'd and would immediately powergame and never killed each other when one was antag and the other wasnt

No, I don't miss that shit.

just genderban females and only allow them through shenanigans like dna modification or the karmotrine drinks, so nobody can roundstart be a foid

>>1869221
americans are busy worshiping niggers at this hour

>>1869646
No females
Replace Asimov with HOGAN

>>1869646
that wont work. people can still play as species that were removed from the character creation menu because the admemes have no way of deleting their statics

is pop getting better lately? I haven't played in years since the serb has been dead during euro hours for a long time but I keep checking the page every day and it seems like we're getting decent pop earlier now, I might actually be able to play a round or two on the weekend if I don't have overtime again

can you do anything neat with telesci or is it mostly just for teleporting dead bodies to medbay

>>1869857
vault hunting

>>1869857
Teleporting TTV bombs to medbay.

>>1869857
Grab high risk items remotely. You just need to have a known coordinate, then calculate the offset from the true coords, then steal everything you want

>>1869857
cult conversions

which static is the most reddit and which is the most 4chan

>>1869912
your
mine

Mine is the most 4channel.

what about 2ch
both net and ru

What's a genuinely likeable static?

>>1869937
schlomo

>>1869937
alexa highlands

>>1869937
Skex.

>>1869937
orlando allen and rich butt are always really nice, i like seeing them

>>1869937
JOEY GOURD

>>1869968
did somebody call for a hero?!

>>1869937
Tug and the other bug weren't bad but could become too powergame-y with mc syndrome.

>>1869937
syd robinson

>>1869857
i teleported a dead rat into the detective's office once, turning the room into an inferno and sending the detective into crit as a nonantag

>>1869221
24 players now, anon

>>1869979
>>1869987
hello spacedgod

should i make a femstatic

>>1870045
please do

>>1870028
spacedgod is basedgod

>>1869646
kiwistation moment

why am i never antag
did i do something wrong and get shadowbanned despite never getting antag once

>>1870099
check your roles, they might not have saved antag properly

Another good botany round in which I was completely useless but still got to engage in good food growing autism. :)

>>1869221
join join join!

>>1870113
>not on the list
thank fuck

skex sex

What's poppin, I finally got the fantasy no ERP server propped up. Non grimshart too. It's on the HUB as Crystal Keep. Hop on in, it's time.
rmZt9h7gKy