>>40562142 (OP)I am not afraid of death if it just comes unexpectedly (prefers I don’t even see it coming, as in something drops on my head or stroke, instead of seeing a car coming at me)
What I am afraid is a disease that makes me melt away slowly and makes me desperate and miserable
Infact, I wish every night, that I just never wake up, even though I have goals and ambitions, plans, and hopes during the day and I attend them dutifully
I just find “living” to be pointless and human experiance, shit.
I mean, are we even living? We are just ruled by a bunch of hormones, slight change and our whole perception on life changes.
Another day I was thinking, maybe if I was a super Uber chad with PERFECT genes (nothing like this exist) then It might have been worth it to live, but then I realize that I am going to get bored of my face and body soon after. So unless I am an immortal shapeshifter, with ability to re and de sensitize my receptors at will, and shift in and out of material world, living doesn’t worth it