>>40618815 (OP)>i smoke weed; i jer of 3 times in a rowOP, friend, this is not what God asks of us, it's not what He wants from any of us - no wonder your thoughts lead to death.
Jesus Christ is life - if you want things to change, then improve, and if you want to improve, Follow Christ. The first step is stopping weed; pray to Jesus and ask for help in quitting - ask, and you shall receive! God bless!