My grandma was 86 at that time, living alone after grandpa died 11 years ago. One day while me and my mom were cleaning the house, she suddenly started yelling: "I AM GOING TO DIE, I AM GOING TO DIE" We rushed to her room and she was sitting on the floor having a panic attack. She held my hand and kept repeating: "I don't want to die, I don't want to die, I don't want to die". We called emergency and as she was getting up she told me: "Anon please don't let the darkness take me, I don't want to stop existing". Then as she was riding in the ambulance, she suffered a heart attack and died on the spot (She had heart problems before). She died in complete fear.

This scarred me mentally, her fear of the eternal void that comes when we die. You just stop existing, just gone into the eternal darkness, no sound, no image, no movement, only dark. I don't know how I can live like this now, knowing that you cease to exist...

>>40644225 (OP)
“It is a fearful thing to fall into the hands of the living God.” (Hebrews 10:31)

Your grandma just had a bad experience or reaction to dying I suppose. I’m sorry you had to see that but that’s all there is to say. We can’t assume what will happen when we die if it’s unfounded and causes distress.

>>40644291
Is this what you do all day? Just stalk thread to thread and think of what bike verse you can quote?
>>40644330
Funny how you zeroed in on the darkness part. I’m guessing because it didn’t align with your bullshit theory of an afterlife, you prioritized addressing it.

>>40644351
The darkness part is basically the whole point of your post and is apparently what made you piss your pants. Your grandma isn’t an expert on the afterlife either, I’m just telling you to not make assumptions that negatively impact your mental health bro. I have no clue what happens for sure after death. It could be eternal darkness or erasure of the self, and that doesn’t scare me. When you get older, you will probably get closer to making peace with this concept.

>>40644522
“And as it is appointed unto men once to die, but after this the judgment:” (Hebrews 9:27)

>>40644545
This has to be a bot or severely retarded person.

>>40644225 (OP)
Shit, anon, that's harsh. Well, you must meditate on Death.

>You just stop existing, just gone into the eternal darkness, no sound, no image, no movement, only dark
Then be prepared for that. Giving my personal beliefs, going to the Void is the actual endgame. Imagine that you are a soul in eternal pain and sorrow without relief. Would you go to the light and reincarnate on Earth again to perpetuate your miserable existence, or would you want something completely different? Even if it means absolute annihilation or the final transformation of the soul, I think it's more desirable than to keep coming here. Even though your grandma was glancing the darkness, you can be certain that she has gone to the light by the simple fact that she didn't embrace death. She wanted life, material life, warmth, and you can be certain that she got it. Reincarnating is the general rule, not the exception.

Read about Alchemy. Start with the Anatomy of the Psyche, even if you aren't familiar with analythic psychology. Pay special attention to the nigredo process. There is nothing in terms of esoteric knowledge that backs the "lights out" theory as a standard, in fact, one must do extremely complex processes to be annihilated as an existent being. Even so, it's more likely that you'll become something entirely different, instead of ceasing to exist completely.

Your grandmother didnt have a supernatural premonition of her death, she had a panic attack and her inability to control her breathing and pulse caused her to have a heart attack. This is not meant as an insult to your family member but she sounds like she was neurotic and unhealthy. If dying is 'nothing' there won't be any 'blackness'. Just because she died fearfully doesn't mean dying is a fearful experience or you must experience fear and pain. Your grandma was afraid because she was a fearful person. You can have a heart attack and be in pain but not be afraid of your inevitable death. Next time you want to fixate on death think it through all the way. Dont just sit there feeling sorry for yourself or enamored with your own negative sentiment. Death doesn't mean anything except permanent unconsciousness.

>>40644225 (OP)
The void is nothing to fear. We've all been there before, some of us more than once.

>>40644832
At that age and with her preexisting heart condition that panic attack sounds like rapid onset of terminal anxiety. Boomers are known to be terrified of death as they are heavily tied to their egoic character identity which dissolves upon death.

OP - Your grandma didn't do any inner work in her life, she squandered it collecting ceramic curios and watching Wheel of Fortune. I don't know what what happens to her after death. Hopefully her fears were alleviated and she's at peace.

>"I don't want to stop existing"
Buddhist do a lifetime of meditation to just reach this.

>>40645706
KEK, what a bunch of retards.

egoistical bitch. she was a burden for people around, good riddance. give life to the young ones.

>>40645777
That's just nasty and uncalled for. It is a tragedy, that's what it is, when people die without God.

Well ain't that a fucking thing.
The last gift your grandmother gave you before croaking, the eternal fear for a darkness that doesn't exist and won't happen.

I SEE YOU

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

>>40644225 (OP)
Im sorry you had to go through that anon, that sounds incredibly traumatic.
That being said, you don't have to adopt your grandmother's perspective, and I don't think she would want you to.
There were probably a lot of built up contributing factors to why she felt that way, and you don't have those, you had her.

I banged my grandma before she died desu
She was in a coma and I wad left taking care of her
Came inside her pussy twice
It was the best moment of my life
https://youtu.be/9fr2n72uzkc?si=QENzgn4K2BORTU1c

I'm sorry anon. Not due to a traumatic experience, but I used to be very afraid of what you're describing, too. I still don't want to die too early, but what helped me cope with it was learning and absorbing something akin to pic rel

>>40646944
And another picture regarding this topic

>>40644291
Nigger

>>40644225 (OP)
After you die, you stay in Bardo for a while (picture the Black Lodge from Twin Peaks), then you reincarnate