Not sure where to post this but this is the schizo board.

I spend the majority of my time researching conspiracy theories. I'm open to any of them as long as they sound plausible. Except flat earth those idiots, shills and water muddiers can get fucked.

Anyways I was diagnosed schizo affective back in 2020, and switched doctors recently. This new doctor doesn't think it's schizophrenia, despite showing most of the symptoms. I can't even remember how many times I've been involuntarily committed or homeless, it's inevitable in my mind.

He basically called me a liar in a round about way that I didn't understand until much later because I'm not that smart.

Like ya bro, I lived in a tent for years hearing and seeing shit, having angels tell me I'm the new Messiah and I must lead by example. Think ing people are trying to kill me.

He's the only doctor at that treatment center and it's telehealth so he doesn't give a fuck at all.

I've been denied SSI and I'm waiting on a hearing date but I don't think I can make it, I've been fighting this for years now and now my doctor won't support me.

It's like the world isn't made for me, everything is designed to make me kill myself. I'm fucking tired, I just want to be normal I hate this shit.

If I get a final denial I'm going to kill myself. It's just not worth living.

>>40648717 (OP)
>Like ya bro, I lived in a tent for years hearing and seeing shit, having angels tell me I'm the new Messiah and I must lead by example. Think ing people are trying to kill me.
That's an impressive amount of reflection. A lot of schizos struggle to accept they are insane. How are you doing it?

>>40648717 (OP)
>I just want to be normal I hate this shit.
>I just wan to be normal

Why would you aspire to be normie scum? The angels are right you should kys.

>>40648850
False, I partake in a schizo board and a lot of the us know something is wrong. Admittedly, the level of schizo on x is on an entirely different level.

The fact is I lived that way thinking everyone else was wrong. I knew things that they didn't. I think I have a preternatural ability of knowing information that others aren't privy too. I heard demons have this ability, I think I was possessed when I was a child. The house was extremely haunted and had very bad energy.

Why are you trying to upset me friend? I'm trying to find a solution to my woes.

>>40648717 (OP)
It's real and they're called machine elves. Don't listen to the Jew doctor or any of these retards in this thread.
It's 4D. The system exists to cover up such phenomena. They don't want people escaping to higher dimensions.

>>40648892
>Why are you trying to upset me friend? I'm trying to find a solution to my woes.
I'm not trying to upset you. I am just impressed by your ability to reflect. I don't doubt your struggles.

Schizophrenia is not real. Not a single person has it that didn't want to be that way. The materialist reality contradicts the way they wanted to be but they wanted to be like that.

>>40648717 (OP)
You sound fairly intelligent, because of that, the doctor, rightly or wrongly, likely believes you're capable enough to work.

Capitalism is an immensely cruel system. You should try and avoid suicide by any means necessary, even if it means you have to steal to survive.

>>40648717 (OP)
https://www.shortform.com/blog/julian-jaynes-bicameral-mind-theory/
This is you. Schizophrenia is a social construct.

>>40648717 (OP)
> having angels tell me I'm the new Messiah and I must lead by example
>if I get a denial I'm going to kill myself

What do you believe you will achieve by suicide? It does not make sense to start over from scratch when we are so close to the grand finale.

>>40648717 (OP)

kill the doctor who fucked with you. then plea insanity.

>>40648717 (OP)
Tell your doctor that you think they are conspiring against you. That’s pretty schizo.

>>40648717 (OP)
> Random schizo verbal diarrhea
> Checks inside
> NASA shill

Every time lol

There is nothing I can ever do to help you but I care about you. Schizoaffective disorders are hell, and society makes it worse because nobody gives a shit about anybody else anymore. I sincerely hope you try to find another treatment center before you decide the way out is the only way. You matter, and I'm so sorry our society is so terrible at treating you like a human being.

Godspeed, Anon. I will never know you but I love you, and while the world is better with you in it it shouldn't have to hurt to exist.

>>40648717 (OP)
This is not a personal blog faggot

>>40648717 (OP)
you should look for some organization specialized in cases like yours, they know how to handle the situation, possibly warning your doctor and threatening legal action