I hate everyone who hurt me. Whenever I think about my ex girlfriend it makes my blood boil because she betrayed me and was fancying a man way better than me in every sense. It triggered all my past traumas, being ugly, useless, not good enough...

I know pretty much all religions say hatred is bad but it's the only thing that pushes me forward, what can I do? How can I spiritually heal? I'm too ugly and overall useless to ever be loved in an authentic way

I cant answer your questions or guide you in any directions thatll make your problems disappear. Probably no one will be able to do that but yourself. But I commend you for making the effort to overcome the hatred. We've almost all been jilted in this world at some point or another and Im no exception. The darkness is when you let that turn you into something like a /pol/ack.

>>40700309 (OP)
just take it easy man

being angry because you been lied to is natural and healthy, now you are not so gullible anymore
don't ruin your life over it

chill, play videogames and enjoy life

> I'm too ugly and overall useless to ever be loved in an authentic way
yeah bro i am ugly to and pretty women will never want me, but that is okay, none of this is my fault
I didn't choose to be ugly, so why ponder on it, it's outside my control
just don't let anyone gaslight or shame you, normies can't accept reality of looks, they just want to delude themselves
typical survivorship bias
and btw not even chad gets loved in an authentic way, he just gets lust after for his looks, if he would have an accident that makes him ugly, the "love" of women would dissapper too, it is what it is

>i'm overall useless
people can't use you if you are useless, that is a good thing
just play videogames and have a good time bro.

chill and take it easy man

>>40700309 (OP)
You are probably being remotely targeted to exacerbate those feelings. Its completely normal to be resentful over the hand that you have been given at life.
However, do try to move away from the online world. Take care of your body by exercising even if its just walking around, drink more water, less processed foods. Sometimes a good haircut and nicer clothes can help you look much better and presentable.
Shut out all people that hurt you or try to get at you. It takes time. Hell, even the demonic agents will try to target you once more again when it feels like you are doing better so keep that in mind.
Pick up a mantra to read over and over again to keep them at bay somehow. Good luck!

Ahahah yeah dem girls r a riot...
Its a good day for pain anon...
Always a good day for pain...
Get back on ya saddle...
Dig your heels in...
And hit the sunset son...
Young bulls want to fuck dem all...
Old bulls want to fuck em right...

>>40700336
How do you deal with it though? Do you believe you could be genuinely loved by a woman?

I thought I was and turns out I was wrong and it just reaffirmed everything I thought about myself, I used to be decent looking but all the hatred and bad habits took a toll on my body and now I look horrible

You seem like a good person, though. I would recommend you to explore the world around you, life could surprise you in a good way one day

>>40700334
>>40700350
Thank you Anons, I don't know, hated kept me alive pretty much in my childhood, it's was kinda like that meme "too angry to die" it's all I know but the burden is too heavy right now and I read about religion and they put a lot of emphasis on forgiveness but I don't know

>>40700309 (OP)
I will give you what happened to me as an example, take it for what it's worth

redirect the hate towards the "world" rather than specific individuals, think "they are symptoms of a greater disease" (this is what Christians and cynics do and often where they will stop)

think about the brutality of nature even before humans existed, accept it. Get into martial arts/go to the gym. Accumulate money. Read. Try not to engage with others. There will still be occasional hate here. (this is where the people that rule us, mostly sociopaths, stop)

Get so engaged, so tired, so focused that "feeling" is a choice. Then when that choice comes start by feeling "it is what it is".
Remember that hate is being ruled by something else, and that's a bitch mentality, nature is unforgiving to such behavior. Self-pity too.

Then you may progress into feeling "pity" or "empathy" some times. Eventually, if you are comfortable materially and have done all the above, you may sometimes feel "love", not in a sexual way.

Best of luck OP

>>40700368
>think about the brutality of nature even before humans existed, accept it.
It's not related but why was nature so brutal even before Adam and Eve? That aspect never made any sense to me

>>40700367
Forgiveness is an important process. Once you realize that other people make mistakes and move passed it, then it becomes much easier to forgive yourself for things you might have done. For mistakes you might have made. Doesnt mean theres no more hurt, or that resentments and other negativities in your soul totally go away but it initiates a healing process.

>>40700363

>Do you believe you could be genuinely loved by a woman?
No.
I doubt genuine love can exist. It's all a conditional.
You talked about being useless, which makes me think that maybe deep down you understand what I am talking about.

>How do you deal with it though?
I don't know I just got used to it.
There are a lot of other interesting thing one can pursue other than women.
And frankly a lot of those things seem more interesting than woman and having a relationship or building a family.
Many people talk about continuing ones bloodline, but is this really worth it to take responsibility for another human for 18 years and longer, sacrificing all your time and money for someone else?
and about lineage, your direct offspring contains only 50 percent of your genes, their offspring only 25 percent in 5-10 generations your genetic imprint will almost be non existent.
And why identify with your inherited genes anyway, it's nothing you chose, so why care about it.
That's how I see it.

If you need a companion get a dog. I don't need a companion, but some people do.
If you need intellectual stimulation there are literally millions of unexplored ideas at your fingertips with the internet.
If you need community join the masons or your local dog club or whatever club you like.

I personally enjoy listening to music, thinking about life/reality, philosophy, sometimes debating on /x/, sometimes playing old videogames,
sometimes I take hikes, relax in nature if I feel like it.
I have been looking into meditation and occult stuff too, can give fancy sensations or impressions to explore.

The need/want for romance just disappeared. Actually I avoid connections now, better for my peace of mind.

If I want to feel the romance or get emotional I am

I just try to take things easy and not stress myself out about anything

> I look horrible
You can work on your habits though if you think it's worth it.

>You seem like a good person
depends on the moral framework

>>40700309 (OP)
Hey bro, its okay to be honest about how you felt towards her, ypu dont need to carry all the bullshit she gave you like sissyphus.
You'll just end up bringing that into the next relationship.
Don't sell yourself short.

Use the anger like a tool. Unleash when the time is right, but don't spend it every day (as inexhaustible as it may seem) because it won't do you any good while directionless.

>>40700461
>incel - the post

>>40700309 (OP)
you sound like an arab. kys.