All sex is filthy. Even within marriage. A man may be a perfect gentleman but in bed he is a beast. Impossible to ejaculate without regarding even one's wife with evil animal lust. And yet from this dark act a new life brought about. And yet the very orgasm a big bang, a breaking forth omnidirectional, a lightning flash bringing the night to naught: let there be light. And yet the baby the very picture of innocence, in fact its very embodiment. Innocence made flesh, shrouded in celestial light: this the fruit of fucking. What is the deal?

Prose got a little wanky there but anyway. This is paranormal because I trigger paranormal phenomena when I jack off, which is highly annoying. I also have always felt very guilty after jacking off. And yet I have a high libido, see hot women everywhere and can't stop thinking about nutting. When you're a coomer you feel particularly sleazy around children, because your lechery contrasts with their innocence, which like I said above is ironic. Christians say if you can't stop jacking off just get married, but married men say when you habitually fuck your wife it just makes you hornier and you end up jacking off more. Plus most marriages are dead bedroom marriages. Plus most men in my generation are incels for complex economic and cultural reasons. "Just get married." Like that's easy. Fuck you.

As a teen I sincerely wanted to just cut my dick off. Right now I'm just pissed at God. God gives you a dick, a libido, a pair of hands and puts a lot of hot women around you but you're a wretched, wretched sinner if you dare do a little fappy. Shit's fucking retarded. This is one of the main reasons I'm almost considering abandoning Christianity. Thing is one doesn't want to go to hell, right? Haha. Fuck.

Is sex a mistake in God's design? Whole thing's way more trouble than it's worth. Surely some less messy means of reproduction could have been devised. Good grief.

>>40746665 (OP)
Innocence? In our coping minds, yes. They inspire hope, which turns to ash. Humanity is dark. Light leads the way, but would mean nothing without it. This is a painful realization. It's all bullshit. Your dark fucking leads to "light" which in reality is just another dark fucking, which will fuck the dark and bring the "light" which will then turn to darkness once again. There is no light here.

>>40746665 (OP)
Religion dosn't exist you fucking troglodyte. We evolved dicks and vaginas due to natural selection. Even if i'm wrong, if Jesus died for your sins then why the hell are you so worried about it.

My advice to you: go to the nearest strip club, get a lap dance. Your entire perspective on life will likely change. Unless you're gay, then don't do that

you gotta get dirty to get clean

>>40746665 (OP)
Sex feels good relax, everything is fine in moderation. Sometimes you have to jack off to clear your mind. I would stop looking at porn and focus on other aspects of your life.

>>40746665 (OP)
One big misunderstanding you have is, the real Creator is not the God they blab about in church. That character bears almost no resemblance to the Creator of humanity other than the principle that it loves its children. (I don't like saying "he" because this is a much more nuanced being than what can be described in gendered language) A little fappy fappy is fine, if you're not astral projecting to the object of your lust and raping them in your mind. This is why I like hentai. No guilt from possibly accidentally spiritually raping a real woman. I've done that once in the past and it was a real bummer. She told me the day after I fapped to her that she had a weird dream about someone coming to her and forcing themselves on her, at the same time I was fapping and thinking about just that. She was not in the habit of talking about things like that, so I just played dumb and hoped she didn't notice it was me, or figured it was just a dream.
Also, I'm going to disagree with you that you have to put on the mind of a beast to have an orgasm. That makes cumming easy, but it's not necessary. You can cum from opening your heart to her (energetically). Yes, I know that's hard to do with today's crop of women, but I'm from an older generation and it wasn't so easy to give women the 'ick' back in the 80s/90s.

>>40746704
plot of dark souls

>>40746694
wrong reply >>40746759

>>40746694
I feel an actual palpable darkness after fapping and children seem to radiate some sort of actual light. (I'm not attracted to minors btw if any idiot wants to make that connection.) I apologize for the wanky prose but the whole thing does feel weirdly paradoxical to me. Even the way most men have a horny vibe is something that disgusts me. The way they manspread like satyrs while looking at smut on their phones, I can just feel the sleazy energy that they ooze.

I honestly and sincerely wish SEX DID NOT EXIST. I wish we had no genitals. Sex is a fucking curse. You have a thing between your legs clamoring to be wanked 24/7 and when you do your superego kicks in, the vibe gets all dark, you now feel God's wrath bearing down on you. Like your body itself is a trap, a practical joke. Whole thing's fucking gay. Why do I have a fucking penis if I'm not supposed to use it. Why can't I turn my libido off without compromising my health. Why give me this undying appetite that I'm not supposed to sate. What kinda retarded fucking joke is this.

OP here. I like Christianity for the most part, and in fact some of its doctrines seem absolutely perfect to me, it's the true religion of love, equality, decency and everything that is good, but the whole sexual puritanism thing drives me insane. Like fapping to a bikini haul is a literal mortal sin. You're just supposed to have blue balls forever. Fucking lol. (And I've gone as far as six months without fapping, it's not like I haven't tried nofap.)

But ok, I'm done ranting. Thanks for all the replies. Just going through a bit of of post-nut depression. You've all been there I'm sure.

>>40746774
>Why do I have a fucking penis if I'm not supposed to use it.
you are supposed to use it
>you now feel God's wrath bearing down on you.
there is no god
>Why give me this undying appetite that I'm not supposed to sate.
you are supposed to satiate it

You need to quit with the religious bullshit and quit feeling ashamed to be a human.

>>40746734
>One big misunderstanding you have is, the real Creator is not the God they blab about in church.

I wish, man. According to my research Christianity is the one true religion and I'm a rigorous researcher. It just has too much compelling evidence going for it.

>I've done that once in the past and it was a real bummer. She told me the day after I fapped to her that she had a weird dream about someone coming to her and forcing themselves on her, at the same time I was fapping and thinking about just that.

Very interesting. Sex *is* paranormal. Which must be why religions tend to have such strict rules around it.

>You can cum from opening your heart to her (energetically). Yes, I know that's hard to do with today's crop of women, but I'm from an older generation and it wasn't so easy to give women the 'ick' back in the 80s/90s.

This too is very interesting and yes, with the red pill and internet porn I suppose most millennials like me and younger generations have gotten this idea that sex is supposed to be rough or else you're a beta bitch.

I didn't read everything, but I agree that it's filthy.
I wish we were a little more clean. It turns us into disgusting animals that are willing to tongue anuses.

i once touched my pp with a massage gun and it hurt, so i thought maybe it was a bit much but in the half second or so i was processing this and after i decided to just stop but before i managed to do so, BAM i came all over. I felt nothing (untill a bit later when my dick was sore for a day due to the violence of the massage gun), but came.
It was this that made me realize that actual sex has nothing to do with human sexuality. Animals that just do it to reproduce and then they are done. Everything that happens then when people go and fap or sex or everything, is based not on the mechanical stimulation of the body but entirely within our mind.
its all some kind of social dominance hierarchy stuff. monkey likes to be secure in his place

>>40746665 (OP)
I was the same as you OP. I found the SR threads and decided to test it for myself. Over 250 days celibate now and I am such a changed human I am happy to say my soul left the body and a new strong one took over. We have never felt better, never felt more powerful and in control of the body and mind.

It is worth trying if you want god to start speaking to you directly with words in your mind.

Without over sharing and sounding crazy.

1 year ago: Athiest gooner
Now: SR, practicing celibacy, loving all aspects of life, gods words appear to me like visions.

SR is no joke.
Control the beast and you become the king of beasts.
Goodluck and godbless.

>>40746665 (OP)
>>40746774
>>40746820

I had a good chuckle. You are so close to getting it.

>>40746909
I once went six months without fapping. I often go an entire month without doing it. But I feel horny throughout. It's torture. Idk man. I can tell you mean well though, thanks for replying. Ultimately I know you're right but having a high libido is just such a stupid burden.

>>40746949
Getting what? I've seen some shit, son. I know Christianity is real for reasons that are quite empirical, as well as paranormal. I know for a fact that Christ is Lord and that he is good. But I'm having a bit of a Job moment here which I think is okay sometimes.

>>40746962
just get depressed, your libido will be gone

>>40746665 (OP)
You're being too logical for any Christian to respond. It's so silly to reason with them because their (the ones I know) entire philosophy is "blindly obey the Bible." Obviously they don't listen to everything in the scriptures. If they did, they'd spit on the Israeli flag (Rev 2:9 and 3:9). Don't disregard the Bible entirely, but beware those who try to use it to control your life. Weird incest, massive collective punishment, slavery, murder, and animal sacrifice are promoted in the scriptures (my opinion). Ask Christians about this stuff and they'll give you a word salad.

>>40746949
dont just say that and leave without elaborating what he's close to getting

>>40746877
>evidence
you're not even trying

>>40746987
>this refers to israel because i say it does
meanwhile jews are also always accusing jews of being fake jews

i heard it once explained that somewhere where it says 'effeminate', this has the historical/cultural context of fapping. At any rate jews also consider masturbation to be really bad and christianity is just an offshoot jewish sect based on their apocalyptic mysticism and some greek ideas so it seems pretty solid that its probably bad even if contemporary reading of english translations of the bible do not flatly say 'thou shalt not fap'

>>40746665 (OP)
The filth is the point dummy. It's the most visceral way to show people that creation in this world involves getting your hands dirty.

>>40747039
This is why sterile control freak faggot narcissists will always lose

>>40746665 (OP)
>As a teen I sincerely wanted to just cut my dick off. Right now I'm just pissed at God.
I guess we should all listen to you then. Seriously though, try Aphrodite.

>>40746877
>It just has too much compelling evidence going for it.

>>40747036
Never said anything about the verses referring directly to Israel. My point was that the Revelation has two distinct verses that denounce the ethnic imposters whose homeland happens to be Israel. It's called being succinct.
Spanking it isn't any worse than fucking. You're literally just getting your rocks off. Helps rid your mind of sexual distractions.

>>40747010
>>40747076
Exorcisms, NDEs, miracles. Research all these phenomena from a comparative religion angle and see which religion stands out. Also please solemnly disregard atheists here. The people who truly wield knowledge and power in this world know full well that the spiritual realm is real. Atheism is a psyop for the masses and people like Dawkins are mere shills. Hell, even sophisticated atheists like Nietzsche were shills.

>>40747130
None of that is evidence of Christianity itself though. It's just evidence of an unseen realm.

>>40747039
Cool, nice perspective. Aesthetically and metaphysically it makes sense. But our bodies keep nagging us to get dirty and when we do massive guilt ensues. So the alternatives are feel horny or feel guilty. Shit sucks.

>>40747044
I get it. I hate being neurotic. I hate clean freaks.

>>40747045
>I guess we should all listen to you then.

I'm not pontificating, am I? I'm just venting.

>>40746665 (OP)
This. I've always felt an almost divine aversion to sex with my peers or anything beyond hanging out like buddies. I had no drive to dehumanize them to objects for arousal.

And to everyone on this thread, think long and hard about WHY you have such a basal, all-consuming desire for sex.
To engage in the act that just so happens to drag souls from paradise into this world of lack and competition.
Now who would want to create and sustain such a world of suffering and constant desire for resources? Who, or rather WHAT, benefits from this arrangement?

>>40747168
Hmmmm

>>40747168
>think long and hard about WHY you have such a basal, all-consuming desire for sex.
Because that is how babies are made. If we didn't have that desire, we would cease to exist
>Who, or rather WHAT, benefits from this arrangement?
Humanity. Every living thing on earth is just parasites of the earth that multiply and reproduce like a bacteria or virus.

>>40747130
>please solemnly disregard atheists here and listen to my cope ramblings

>>40746665 (OP)
We are born in a Reproductive Culture, sex surrounds us on many levels. We are only now stoping reproduction as overpopulation kicks in. The problem is not sex itself, it is that our culture is mostly purposeless without it. Sex is part of our identity, it is pointless to emulate an aversion to sex while at the same time being attracted to it, which is what evil retards like OP are trying to do. Christ barely talked about sex but it is what the average "Christian" has complained about for centuries. Nevermind pharisees, nevermind ATHEISM, nevermind personal problems and being a crazy jobless schizo: SEX THOUGH, gotta spend all energy whinning about it? What happens with all that repressed sexuality? Turns into gay fetishisms, turns into autistic outbursts, turns into being unbearable, turns into a fake Busy culture, turns into feminism, turns into being a poor beta cuck.

The question is: why is there a sexual tension buildup in the first place? Because you have already sinned. Desiring a woman but doing semen retention is pointless, you have already desired her. Adultery has been commited with your thoughts, it is on you, not God's fault

>>40747228
>evil retards like OP

Thanks for the kind words. I'm not trying to do shit, I'm just venting. "Emulate an aversion to sex"? What does that even mean? I'm a horny guy and I feel massive guilt after I fap. That's all.

>Christ barely talked about sex

Actually he talked about it quite a bit. And then Paul talked about it even more. And then there's the entire Old Testament (which both Jesus and Paul quoted a lot) which gets really really detailed about sexual morality.

>SEX THOUGH, gotta spend all energy whinning about it?

Here's the thing, asshole: I WISH I could be just like any regular guy and not feel guilty after I fap. But every time I do I feel guilty and feel this compulsion to... not to confess, but to write these weird rants like I'm Job directing a diatribe at God. Alright? Yeah it's a waste of time and I wish I was not like this.

The rest of your post reads like a weird mix of Wilhelm Reich and NoFap with a pious slant.

>>40746665 (OP)
>Hide thread.

>>40746665 (OP)
maybe you are filthy or the way you have sex is filthy

it is not filthy normally...death is more filthy

>>40746665 (OP)
It must be natural. It'd be unhealthy to bury your nature. Masturbate without porn and pleasure your body well. To feel guilty is what you were conditioned to feel.
I can empathize with being sexually frustrated under economic and cultural reasons. I'm in a town with lots of pretty women I could do fuck all with because I make pennies and live at home still. There's no approaching. My personality isn't great either but that's my own fault.

>>40746665 (OP)
Jokes on you, I don't even have sex

>>40746774
You are supposed to bring the energy of your sex drive into the light of your conscious awareness, and evolve it upwards into a lightbody which can reach into the sky. You are ashamed of something that you hide from yourself, from your creator. The sexual energy itself is creator energy. What would you be willing to show God or your twin flame?
Sin is that which you wish to hide from the presence of God. God is all around us, it always knows what we do. Sin is how we hide and shield our awareness from comprehending that fact.
When you sublimate the sexual drive by guiding it towards a more spiritual purpose, you develop angelic qualities within your body and soul. Its meant to help you grow, its not something you are supposed to cast aside in shame.
If you hate your sex drive, you might be trans, just saying. Its fine if you are, angels like it a lot for some reason.

>>40747194
seconding the first part of this post, i dont know why people come to this board to pretend to act smart, you guys are getting to reddit levels of this kinda behaviour

>>40746665 (OP)
Like the other anon said, it's not filthy and disgusting and not necessarily animalistic.

Porn has damaged our view of sex anon, so most people view it as you described. It's no longer seen as sacred and special, between a man and women in love, and in marriage. Sex has been mixed in with lust, which you seem to be struggling with - lust is the demon to slay.

Ask God in prayer to help with these feelings, and if you really want to address and explore them, then have you asked God to provide for you a loving wife? Why not?

Bro just jack off and cum on a crystal that you charge up with all of your dark manifestations.

>>40748060
just fyi anon, this is exactly what a hellbound demon would suggest

>>40748069
Bro's looking to self-flagellate himself for touching his doodle, it's the logical conclusion to charge up a dark J.O. crystal

>>40748089
Not according to God, so according to who? lillith? baal? moloch? ishatar? satan?

The Lord rebuke them all.

>>40748098
By the force that transcends all language

>>40748102
>an unnamed force is making me jerk off

demonic

>>40748115
You are free to put up whatever labels make you feel the most comfortable.

>>40748128
No hard feelings from me anon, I just wish you knew the true nature of what has control over you, what you're inviting into your life, where it leads.

Whatever forces your dealing with, they all know Jesus Christ, Son of the most high, ask them.

>>40748144
you're*

OP don't give up on your faith in this fight, lean into God, trust in the Lord!

>>40748144
I'm open to exploring literature, can you lead me in the direction of demonic sex magick that describe covering crystals with semen or are you being led by intuition rn?

Why don't you have sex in the name of God?

>>40746665 (OP)
>What is the deal?
I too have thought about how disgusting an act coitus is at being a creative force. Wish I knew the deal.

>>40746665 (OP)
>you're a wretched, wretched sinner if you dare do a little fappy
God didn't say that.

>>40746694
>Your dark fucking leads to "light" which in reality is just another dark fucking, which will fuck the dark and bring the "light" which will then turn to darkness once again. There is no light here.
Poignant, and unfortunately so.

>>40746665 (OP)
abrahamists being fucking freaks about sex again

>>40746774
>Sex is a fucking curse. You have a thing between your legs clamoring to be wanked 24/7 and when you do your superego kicks in, the vibe gets all dark, you now feel God's wrath bearing down on you.
what life is like in the lower realms. this is an inner problem anon. the joke is that the spiritual world is around you and some degree of these impulses ans even thoughts arent yours to begin with. It's beamed at you to see if you respond. Just check whenever an idle thought comes at you how easy it is to get it to leave. If it feels more like a lil shit pulling on your nose to get you to do something, it probably is.

>>40746665 (OP)
We could live in a society that glorifies the healthy nature of sex. But we don't. The trust is often misplaced to invite a burglar into your loins but the vulnerability of an individual to accept a mutual bonding experience as a growing tool for humility...

Stop demonizing things that can be made more than what the eyes see. Sure..naw I like the gross smush, but that's me. But sex should be between individuals that mutually desire the deeper layers of what sex offers. Not just the sex itself. They can save the ritual of casual sex for later in the relationship

>>40746665 (OP)

Lust is my greatest battle. Day in and day out. I want to be a perfect spiritual being with pure thoughts and pure mind. And yet my lust for the flesh of women is a constant presence. I thought at one time when I am older it would fade, but now that I am older it remains. It seems this will be with me forever.

>>40746665 (OP)
Posting in Tate's thread

>>40746665 (OP)
Christianity tells you sex is bad because it's a cult that manipulates you by keeping you in a constant state of guilt, just let it go.

>>40746665 (OP)
>Even within marriage. A man may be a perfect gentleman but in bed he is a beast. Impossible to ejaculate without regarding even one's wife with evil animal lust.

Coomer -lifestyle is bad for your.

>>40749934
God literally tells humans to be fruitful and multiply; if it's done in marriage there's no problem with sex.

Sex is only bad if it's casual, with different partners - it loses meaning beyond base animal desire, it's supposed to have more meaning than that, and that's why you feel an unfulfilling void after a casual hook up.

pan death porn addict anon was right, this is the lamest shit i've ever read. get a fucking chastity cage and leave us out of your fetish you freak.

How legit is microchimerism?
Do promiscuous chicks carry the spirit of every man they fucked with regardless of having conceived?

>>40749934
Most retarded thing I've read. Not just on /x/.

I was a coomer and then converted and now trying to conceive with my wife and now I can see that procreative sex, love and lust are 3 separate things. Lust actually feels like something that was forced on me externally. I now can't help but think, "this is my wife, she trusts me to the point of wanting to have my child, a whole new human being will be created inside of her, amazing and incredible, i have a lot of responsibility to this". We can bring out lust but it feels like shallow pretense now. Kinda like playing paintball in the middle of an actual battle.

>>40749934
You know nothing about Christianity. You have not even read the Bible. Keep looking at shadows on a cave wall.

>>40746665 (OP)
sex without women is beautiful

>>40750525
>We can bring out lust but it feels like shallow pretense now. Kinda like playing paintball in the middle of an actual battle

Ima haveto put dis in me notes

>>40746665 (OP)
Humans are scientifically the same category as animals, meaning we have the same animalistic drives, instinctual impulses and base urges as them, I don't see why you're freaking out about discovering that.

>>40746665 (OP)
I think this thread helped me realize i won't master bait again. I've just been humping my bed every few weeks but haven't lately. There is so much changing.

>>40746665 (OP)
You just see sex in a warped way because patriarchal religion has brainwashed you into thinking sex is about domination and penetration and that people of the same sex can't/shouldn't have sex

>>40746665 (OP)
Like sex is just like working, if you don't like sex right now it doesn't mean you wouldn't in a different context. Sex is currently an avenue for exploitation, like work, it's a social status symbol and the fact that you don't want that means you're a good person. But that doesn't mean that sex or work are inherently bad. It's just the reasons people have sex and work right now are bad. They want power over others which is actually antithetical to our communal nature.

>>40750572
And yet we decide to give into them time and time again, despite having the higher thinking for doing otherwise. And continuing to bring innocent souls into a greed-filled world of endless struggle.
It's not about the act itself. But rather its purpose in the grand scheme of things.
Awfully convenient that life is programmed with a desire to duplicate its experiences of endless grappling for survival, huh?
Think about it anons, beyond "well we're animals too duh of course we wanna fuck". Why do you think living things have that desire in the first place?

>>40750696
>Why do you think living things have that desire in the first place?
To propagate life, otherwise we'd be extinct, which would be peaceful for some misanthropes, but terrifying for those who love living and fucking, and that consist of 90% of the masses.
Does that answer your question?

>>40750719
No, because my question was WHY is there such a drive to prevent extinction.
Consciousness doesn't begin and end on Earth. Earthly life is just one out of likely millions of different types of lives to live.
You can live and fuck all you want with your life without dragging other souls into this mess. So why is there a pre-programmed drive to summon OTHERS here through the logical conclusion of sex?

>>40750719
No, because my question was WHY is there such a drive to prevent extinction.
Consciousness doesn't begin and end on Earth. Earthly life is just one out of likely millions of different types of lives to live. Our souls don't ever go "extinct" even if Earthly life does. And yet we are programmed to think we can only have lives on Earth.
You can live and fuck all you want with your life without dragging other souls into this mess.
So why is there a pre-programmed drive to summon OTHERS here through the logical conclusion of sex?

>>40750772
Non-reproductive sex exist, in case you didn't know.
Procreation is not the end-all-be-all aspect of libido.

>>40750794
True. But the original purpose of libido is for procreation.
That's what my main focus is on.

>>40750852
>the original purpose of libido is for procreation.
And who decided that? Cultural norms forced upon you?

>>40746665 (OP)
sex IS marriage. clown.

>>40750964
Everything is marriage bro
Doing anything with anyone is marriage.

>>40746665 (OP)
i think you need to accept the fact you're an animal, first and foremost. you're no different than the beasts in nature needing to procreate. animals feel arousal, that's okay.
you're getting paranormal experiences because your conscience can't handle all of the guilt you feel during arousal, and now it has to externalize that experience
think about what you do to not give into your feelings of arousal, especially if it isn't related to shame, but rather restraint
having one partner whom you can rely on outside of sex will do wonders for you. i encourage you to find a mate. just don't have kids, you can't be trusted around kids. your desire to ruin their innocence is quite frankly evil, and i encourage you to stop empowering that thought, let it go next time it comes up and do something productive. if you can't control it, consider killing yourself.
if you need the threat of hell to be a good person, you might want to reconsider being a christian. you're not even thinking about the glory of god, about becoming a better person, to live a virtuous life and to be of service to the world around you. a good amount of spirituality to predicated on the fact you live in a society. truly ask yourself, outside of your shameful acts of masturbation, what good have you brought onto the world?

>>40746665 (OP)
First paragraph was awesome, thanks bro.

>>40747138
>None of that is evidence of Christianity itself though.
This.

Doesn't matter how modest you pretend to be, you'll still be making guttural moans during sex and defecating like an animal.
Humans being a creation of the divine is a lie.

>>40746665 (OP)
>As a teen I sincerely wanted to just cut my dick off.

>>40751323
Dolphins fart into the ocean

>>40746665 (OP)
anon you were psychologically abused from an early age by a 2,000-year-old cult designed by dark adepts to short-circuit your natural drives and sublimate them toward the building of cathedrals, etc.

prevalence of feelings of shame and guilt are the primary tells for early childhood psychological wounds. look into pete gerlach and his website sfhelp.org

>>40747118
>My point was that the Revelation has two distinct verses that denounce the ethnic imposters whose homeland happens to be Israel.
It literally doesn't, you just take racists' cherry-picked verses at face value without actually reading the passage. The two verses say exactly what cities these "fake Jews" were located in and neither city is in Israel (Alaşehir/Philadelphia is in Turkey, as is İzmir/Smyrna). Also it's clearly referring to two specific congregations contemporary with the visionary account.
if you feel the absurd need to apply everything in this 1,900-year-old trip report to the present day it's obvious that those who say they're Jews but really aren't are the "British Israelites" and the African-Americans who use the same LARP but with themselves as the deity's chosen.

>>40752012
>racists
>"fake Jews"
>What is West Bank barrier
LMAO