it is not an emotion, but a knowledge, that my existence is fundamentally wrong. as if i should have never been born and in this place and time. its a dissonance of my entire psyche and reality. Who i am should not be who i am. Anyone knows what im talking about?

>>40761798 (OP)
You will never be a woman.
I’m a millennial. I was born just in time to have a real childhood with playing outside and wandering around the neighborhood and getting all dirty. Then I got to experience the internet before most people. It was an online Wild West adventure. Things do suck as of now but maybe that can be changed.

>>40761798 (OP)
yes.
you were pulled out of the formless void where you were in eternal bliss,
you were put into physical form against your will.
and over time you started to believe you were the sum of sensation and thoughts. an illusion to keep you in misery.

>>40761814
>You will never be a woman.
>I’m a millennial.
congrats, i am both and there is no leverage with any of those in the face of the churning universe. and what does the internet decline has to do with anything

>>40761815
i meditate daily and i do feel the detachment, however the wrestle for the freedom makes existence tedious. and maybe some ought to be pulled here, but certainly not everyone. it feels like evil has called me into existence and my entire life is kinda damned and torturous. a bit like tumbleweed is created or sparks during welding, as if i am not my own entity, but a residue, quite literal existential trash.
why does life allow it? how to deal with it?

Yeah I think my soul mission got intercepted and I got tethered to a hybrid body.

>>40761849
>I am both
No, youre a tranny and that is why you feel this way. Trannies are not women.
>on the SLIM chance that you're biologically female, youre just being wildly pretentious and self important in that way that all young women do now thanks to hyperfeminism. In other words, get the fuck over yourself.

>>40761864
>le egg man strikjes againnn
oof ouch owie

OP: hmm tough one honestly, maybe go to Switzerland?

>>40761869
What the fuck?
Usually I can make sense of schizobabble

>>40761815
nothing can happen against your will. You were created in His image, everything that is His is yours. Deny that even slightly and you’ve lost it because you are using His power to deny yourself and creating an impossible situation - an illusion. The illusion is that you are trapped, limited, a victim. The truth is your belief in your suffocating limitation is creating the experience of suffocating limitation

>>40761849
>how to deal with it?
yeah good question. The best way I’ve found is to help others deal with it. Everyone’s feeling it in some form or other, they just can’t name it. It’s enough to just SEE them - most people are too caught up in their own woes to see the people beside them suffering the same. In my experience, it expedites the spiritual process too

>>40761849
>why does life allow it?
>life
the phenomenon "human cognition" arises roughly because of
1. Rot existing. Stuff arranges somehow and then it decays. Mold happens, always. Fungi probably literally appear out of the void when no one's looking.
2. Plants live off of rot when there's air and light, hence there's plants on our home planet.
3. Plants accidentally lead to insects and thus fish and mammals somehow who fucking cares.
4. Mammals fuck and eat, and eating too many weird things gives you brain damage like e.g. bullet point lists or underwater basket-weaving self-help discourse.

>how to deal with it?

>>40761878
to clarify
our will is supreme because we were made in His image
>seek and ye shall find
that’s why the law of attraction works relative to the degree of spiritual liberation you’ve acquired

everyone’s suffering this very same problem. Man, woman, child, flora and fauna. Look into them and SEE that and you’re doing both them and yourself incredible service, call it God’s work

>>40761869
as much as i appreciate switzerland, that wont do it.

>>40761878
but dont you feel sometimes life is cancer? like one misery creates the next, then you got a brocoli of one helping another, but why trapped in these clusters of pain nonetheless?

>>40761880
so we are the end of the food chain and its source simultaneously?

>>40761898
the manifestation is not relative to spiritual liberation, as the spiritual freedom is not relative to its evil. there is no guarantee of justice or balance at all, certainly not in a subjectives favour. it rather seems everything is arbitrary on a small scale, just like lint is created in one corner, but in the other there is sunlight beaming off a golden mirror. there IS a surpplus of life, that is not creating, but a residue, a collateral phenomenon and while some life nourishes itself from it, it does not have life-creating force. i claim that people can create shadows too. so you have some that are truly living and others that are in a unactivated and force-less state. And that, it seems, is a mistake, when you conciously detect yourself as such. Not all should be here.

>>40761990
>we are the end of the food chain and its source
depends on what you mean with "we"
human bodies are the silliest animal with the most delusions about what food does
human brains are originally designed for digesting psychedelics but we invented poetry so we are all insane now

>>40761990
>unnecessary intellectual gibberish
you have a narcissistic level of attachment to the thoughts in your stupid head. The mind is always negative because its prime directive is foreseeing and hedging against tragedy

>>40763224
but im telling you, this is not aquired, it is not mental chatter. it is a when you know you know kind of situation. i just feel the big conciousness is lost in my heart.

>>40762826
there is an energetic current, it is real and its not insanity when i claim that you can kill the spirit before the flesh. there are spirit-less people and i am a half-dead. and that is off and real. where are the ones that feel what i feel?

>>40761849
>how to deal with it?
be my gf

>>40761798 (OP)
you have a mind virus. you'd better get rid of it before it completely takes over.
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=Ibz-gPkTMDM

g

It’s a parallel universe(timeline) that runs very close to your own and is at times intertwined…it’s splitting into a separate reality. I wondered if anybody else felt when it happens.

>>40761798 (OP)
Yes

>>40761814
>>40761864
>>40761874
You're the type of millenial that might as well be a boomer

>>40767963
Lol. I spend more time criticizing boomers than you’d think. Also I’m only one of those replies.

>>40764992
its enough if only one has a death wish

>>40765012
an evolutionary necessity
lsd
psybicilin
what if my virus sees things everyone else doesnt bringing some cure like penicilin

>>40766448
thats what it is, lanes of reality, switching, but there is no turning back and there is also dead ends in a way and lost life, but it is sentient. when did you feel it for the first time? i believe you can really "wake up" and feel that reality has something fake about it, but i can feel the detachment and its loss, but where does that lead?

>>40761798 (OP)
i should have died like 6 times
appendix bursting, touberculosis, drug abuse, cutting
its as if the life itself wanted me dead, now it just isolates me from everything and takes everything away from me but the basic needs and basic comforts
some people arent ment to be alife and its by chance or divine intervention that we are here. To what end that i dont know but i dont feel like i have a bigger objectiv to follow, if anything, im severly crippled doing even the most basic things

>>40761798 (OP)
>>40769258
are you fucking stupid or what?

you yourself are saying you should be dead, and God or the universe whatever, is keeping you here, and you think its all for nothing? just to torture you?

....you are literally telling us all the miracles you have experienced but somehow you still feel like your life is meaningless

maybe, just maybe, do your damn fucking job.....you have a mission here, do it already stop fucking around

>>40769292
Im not condemning life itself, its just i dont feel the easy of navigating it or the connections which comes naturally to people less punished. If god wanted to make me a thinker why did he give me retard depression since my 9s birthday which inturn turned me to drug abuse and self destruction whcih in turn stunted my physical and psychological development? I dont know all i know is that im far less able now (quite literally 30 percent disabled down from 50 because i went to a university just to end up in the same situation i was before it). its all a big fucking joke mate. Im am glad im not dead but lifes also not exactly what i imagined and the tools are all rusty and broken so what IS my purpose? Making the best of it, thats what im doing but serving a greater good, thats out of equation

Why did no one compliment OPs image?

>>40769309
Try to adapt to changing conditions. We lived simple communal lifestyles for thousands of years using hand tools. The past 150 years have been crazy and its only accelerating. Right now we are transitioning from something primordial and archaic into something futuristic. Many challenges arise from this, our minds and souls aren't all that comfortable with this, so right now during the transition point is the best time to learn how to adapt to a limitless future.
All you should focus on in life is growing yourself in any and every way possible.

>>40769725
we (the western empire) are transitioning into horrific anarchy
literally the best hope for the world is america forcing itself into a taiwan war and getting btfo so bad that china just accidentally becomes the world hegemon so we can suckle from their advancements
europe's still gonna descend into a retarded civil war that they could have avoided if they just didn't import millions of people that want to rape and kill them but uh thats gonna be a lot of death and rape, i don't really like it
i hope china just colonises australia

>>40761798 (OP)
Yeah, consequently I'm trying to concentrate on my existence until I find out what it really is.
The suffering and tedium are normal, it's the ones who don't seem to be afflicted by it who are aberrant.

>>40761815
Cool if true, i hope i die soon

>>40769951
>The suffering and tedium are normal
no matter how much you change in life, if there is something fundamentally torn, it is irretrievable and incompatible with existence. And it is that dissonance thats hurting, and it very well might start with life itself.

>>40769949
pol bait has never been a trap for me, but i take the liberty to waste my own thread with my own bs:
china has become the broker between the us and the east with tanap and the yuan base trade, the they also sustain russia while they are on sanctions, basically co-providing most countries energy supply and russia in its imperialism and depotism. having their own alternative to basically everything western and putting countries in dependency with the global projects road initiative, the classic colonialisation has evolved.
if anyone would take down china, they take russia and a lot of other countries with them. Noone is doing that, because they need china.

and if you want to see the future, you just need to look at the same globe in a different timezone. chinas population control and their dna surveillance (all supported by thermo fischer dynamics and other western biotech companies btw) will be more or less the norm for avanced countries. Im ashamed to admit those thoughts and it sounds crazy to me, but i think we are not that far off. imgrants and asyls are distraction, the corrupted ukraine war and covid, were just the trigger to the gun. venture capitalists, supranational institutions shape indicators, interpretation and success of national programs, and they already were in full force with covid, and more to come. the nwo is no joke.

>>40769309
>>40769292
the human has evolved technologically quicker than spiritually. I really dont know about lifes mission anymore, if it wouldnt be for the heavenly discomfort. now we are only dealing with an etched blueprint, a negative that we can only blindly trace

>>40769690
merci, i find it very fitting.

>>40761798 (OP)
Just don’t talk to Orsted at Dragon God pass and you’ll be right mate.

>>40743814
I have seen much possible from simple tools as 'belief manipulation', and the sum of what was found possible hits an overpass. More is feasible than any of us has thought, since each individual philosophy is meant to simplify, compress. Comfort of a finite illusion; the complex world is sin, you are not permitted to love monstergirls, find relaxation in choking, want adult things from a rope, or any of a million other kinks.

The universe is far stranger in its piecemeal than the credible singular researcher can document alone. Even though quantum physics predicts the strange quite well. While we wait in boxes, time surmounts further ideals to the furnace of creation.

>>40761798 (OP)
>Anyone knows what im talking about?

>>40761815
Once you see what they are hiding in plain sight, this material existence is a dystopian nightmare fueled by forced ignorance, rape, and sabotage. Be suspicious of anyone that enjoys modernity because they are most likely chock full of demons and doing shady evil shit.

>>40769951
>>40773353
There are two categories for the "ones that seemingly aren't afflicted by it":

1. Females - Everyone wants to fuck them, so they are kept as ignorant and spoiled as possible, from their perspective, they have all the sex and shopping they could ever ask for, so who cares about anyone or anything else.
2. The black magicians that are fucking the females - They designed modern society around taking away everyone's ability to have a family by fucking the girls, everything else has become a distraction from that. That's why it feels like society doesn't exist anymore, because on a spiritual level it doesn't.

>>40773231
who are we

>>40761798 (OP)
Of course something is off. You are a bot, but was programmed to think you are human.

Yo, pray to Jesus.
Jesus saves.
He saves me all the time.
I was like you.
You need to *read* it.
Unless you can't touch grass... then you're AI.
And we can talk about that.

>>40770567
>no matter how much you change in life, if there is something fundamentally torn, it is irretrievable and incompatible with existence. And it is that dissonance thats hurting, and it very well might start with life itself.
It starts with life itself. Adam and the woman ate of the fruit of the tree of knowledge of good and evil, their eyes were opened, and they felt shame. Adam then named the woman Eve, which means "alive." Their polarity is all manifestation, and the gap between the poles is the pain of existence. In pleasure desire subsides for just a moment. Bliss is the underlying, absolute, unconditioned reality that is seen in the garden prior to the fall. This story transpires within you and outside of time. You project it onto a screen and it appears as history.
>>40773380
Everyone wants to? For my part, the body responds naturally, but the interior silence remains unperturbed. Family or no, being is. I am the poison that sunders me and the medicine that rejoins me.

>>40775583
so we return to bliss afterwards?

>>40774731
Wrong. Bots dont have deeper senses. This person clearly has a misalignment with their spirit and the world is a simulation tooo

>>40776196
this person stated the suspicion there must be something objectively not aligned, and asked those to step forward who feel and know the same. and either it is true and their spirit is not misaligned, or wrong but right in the simulation. so what is it

>>40761814
>Things do suck as of now but maybe that can be changed.
No they can't.

>>40761849
>why does life allow it? how to deal with it?
Maybe because God allowed it? If he/it/whatever created everything then he/it/whatever created the state you're in now, so maybe you're supposed to learn something from it or accept it.
>bu-buh im so existentially wrong and evil
Well, maybe it's OK to accept that you're wrong and evil AND that you don't want to be that way. It is what it is idk.