So My gf of 8 years and I decided to move to her mom's house, because she kept complaining about how she is alone, needs help, is willing to give us the house, and all this other nonsense. Our prior living conditions were pretty grim, so we took her up on her offer. Now after 10 months of living here her mom is the most insufferable boomer I've ever met. She won't allows us to open windows in the house or our room to ventilate, she still won't give us house keys, she tries to make us go to sleep early and wake up early like we are little kids, if we want to do something it has to revolve around her schedule, she refuses to go outside past 3pm to do anything because "the day is over and it's dinner time", and more insane shit.

Mind you, we pay her rent so it's not like we are living for free like parasites. I get fed up and I tell my gf about all this after 10 months. My gf tells me the biggest bombshell just an hour ago. "My mom will disown me and take me off the trust/will if I move out again." So we are basically prisoners in this house now. The problem is I love my gf and want to have kids someday, but I can't live in a space with an insane woman who will police us, and threaten/emotionally manipulate my gf. Is there there any way to get out of this with the least amount of drama and issues as possible?

>>33195969 (OP)
Construct an elaborate system of lies and manipulation to do what you want without making her mad

>>33196687
I second this eye for an eye

>>33196687
So basically if I am to be prisoner here make her seethe and cope to some of my demands?

>>33195969 (OP)
slowly poison her meals

>>33196718
Bro, the autopsy report?

There's likely a favorable compromise you can reach if you talk to the boomer like an infant. If she wants company, suggest a schedule to see *kids* or whatever the fuck woos her. Start planning as if you're off the trust already and you might pick up some leverage on the way.
gl

>>33196782
>If she wants company, suggest a schedule to see *kids* or whatever the fuck woos her.
She only wants her daughter to sit on the couch every day after work and watch movies until bedtime. No time for my gf to do anything else.

>>33195969 (OP)
You need to move out for your self respect.

>>33196828
Damn. So it's better to just break up after 8 years over some insane boomer demands?

>>33196788
schedule shit for her then, something to create some space, so over time she gets used to not having her all the time. It's up to you to have the relationships you want

>>33195969 (OP)
Boomer women are not supposed to own property and boss around men like this. This is not right.
Try to dominate her physically and make her give the keys and deed to you and your gf.
Simple as.

>>33196737
if the doses are low over a long period of time
ok I might get banned for this, this is a joke or something

>>33196851
Husband died and the mom is dragging her feet to finish this process. I think she is doing it on purpose to make us stay here as long as possible while holding this over my gf's head.

>>33195969 (OP)
Your gf is 8 years old? You sick fuck.

>>33196862
Yeah because you have to use force. Talking to women is useless. Get it off of her.

>>33196906
Kek

>>33195969 (OP)
1. Open door.
2. Exit.

>>33197249
I don't think my gf would actually come with me is my concern. In this dating market it would suck to have to go all through those hoops to find someone decent again. If I can't get through to her then I won't have a choice but leave myself. I can't see myself dealing with an emotionally manipulative hag for lord knows how many more years.

Wow and I thought my situation was slightly complicated but just more depressing than this and cake in comparison
This is like next level I wouldn’t last without a confrontation at some point

I think you can try this, at some point when they are zoned out in front of the TV walk in and turn it off and say we all need to have a discussion

Explain that you and your lady are not children and that times are tough and having everyone living together is creating a situation that will boil over horribly unless it is defused now without anyone getting their feelings hurt
>remember logic is nothing to them it’s emotional because they are women
>focus on everyone’s feelings

Tell her you understand that she loves your gf and wants to see her as much as possible but that you also love your gf and want to have time with her outside of the house

Say that unfortunately everyone is not a child anymore
>subtle dig here that she’s acting like a child delivery is key
And that you cannot be treated like little children and need freedom
That not having your own key makes everything impractical and only raises tensions
That you and her don’t need anyone regulating your schedule you can do it yourself

You need to deliver this calmly like your her dad or husband
If she freaks don’t get mad remain calm use your 4chan training and do not get trolled

Expect some tears and upset shit but if you pull it off it will work

I would be planning a muder mentally often if I was you at this point so you gotta defuse and de escalate this situation

Good luck

>>33196836
who says you need to break up?

>>33197267
why is it critical to cohabit? Explain to your gf that you can't live like this, and if she won't leave because inheritance is that important to her, then you can just live separately but still remain in a relationship. Personally though I wouldn't want to live with someone who uses the threat of disownment as a way to control their relatives. My sanity and autonomy is more important than getting some money after my asshole relative dies. Plus there isn't actually any guarantee someone like that won't just cut you out of the will on a whim anyway, and of course anything could happen between now and when they die, they might not even have an estate anymore.

>>33197299
The mom is a colossal retard(she's a TDS liberal) who is so bad to be around no one every visits or talks to her. She's lived in this neighborhood for 23 years, and not once talked to her neighbors. She seems like the type that will die on her hill than to admit defeat.
>>33197310
I confronted my gf today who told me before we left, "No matter what happens I will be by your side, because you are my future. My mother can not stop us from trying to make our own family and life". Today? "I don't want to lose you and choose between you and her. I know she emotionally manipulates me and shits on me for every single thing I do in my life. But I can't live with that weight of knowing she will hate me, or be seen as a horrible daughter". Her mother is blackmailing her with the house, trust, and stock account her dad opened for the family before he died. I told her what good is a house and all of that if you have no one to create a family with? All she would have is sitting everyday on the couch miserably listening to her mom whine, bitch, moan, and complain while watching shows or movies SHE wants to watch.

>>33195969 (OP)
I feel sorry for you I thought my mom was awful

AI says this, it sounds like coercion but im not sure what it means or who has to be coerced

>To successfully contest a will, you typically need to prove specific grounds such as coercion, diminished mental capacity of the testator, or fraud.

>However, contesting a will is a complex and challenging process. You must demonstrate that the will was altered under duress or due to the testator's lack of mental capacity, or that there was fraud or forgery involved.
Additionally, the will must comply with state regulations to be legally valid.

>It's advisable to consult with an estate attorney to assess your case and determine the feasibility of contesting the will. Legal fees can be substantial, and the emotional toll is significant, so it's crucial to weigh the potential benefits against the costs and stress involved.

>>33197332
Worst part? I don't even care about this house desu. My parents are going to give me their house when they die anyway. It's in NYC and I obviously don't want to live there, but when I sell it it will be worth 3 million because it is in a majority white gentrified area. I'm explaining to my gf that we can always just move and buy a home somewhere else in the future but muh mom is clouding her judgement.

Go get a lawyer and get her declared mentally incompetent, this behavior isnt normal, then you can get power of attorney over her so she doesnt fuck you over out of spite, whatever you do or think, before anything, talk to a lawyer about it first

>>33197326
she has NPD, I'm sorry for your loss. depending on the type you could try complimenting her, aggrandizing her accomplishments, pretending to side with her politics, or like anon mentioned keeping her busy letting her see her grandkids and filling her schedule with stuff. on the bright side a bad fall could speed up her cognitive decline

>>33197342
I honestly wouldn't mind this route, and I have told my gf she should consider sending her to a home in the future. However, the uncles on her dads side of the family, who live two states away, would probably get involved and make a scene.
>>33197343
Outside of leaving and risking a break up all I can hope for is a speedy cognitive decline. She just turned 71 so I don't know if it'll happen anytime soon.

>>33197326
I am so sorry man I understand what dealing with a person like this is like
At some point you will realize she is insane and remember nobody crazy EVER thinks they are

You have a stubborn boomer on your hands who obviously failed hard in personal relationships and is lashing out at the world and that world consists of you and your gf

Your best bet is to try to slowly chip away then
One giant conversation will backfire

I tried the confrontation and I got the full insane asshole reveal and it really really fucking hurt bad

Be thankful this isn’t your family

>>33197346
Just talk to a lawyer about it to get information, dont tell anyone at all

>>33197351
Bringing the lawyer in won’t work when someone can seemingly talk like a normal person and make rational decisions even though they turn around and are a total dick in private

Them not liking a situation or having some opinion isn’t mentally unfit
Mentally unfit is like incapable of caring for themselves dementia shit

Remember only a bit ago? Biden is a total potato and everyone was saying he was ok
The public discourse isn’t in your favor

Avoid this at all costs honestly you could lose your gf and then you’ll be super fucked

8 years ago might as well be 50 with how society and dating goes

>>33197366
Who knows, im a schizophrenic and im fairly mentally competent with finances and socialability, intelligence, and everything else, I thought my mother was ostensibly the most socially incompetent person Ive ever met but OP's mother has out done mine, Ive been through a similar process and it seems like it should be flexible but again who knows, one of the disability criteria is extreme lack of social skills

>>33197381
OP is dealing with someone able to manipulate family members
They have social skills

They’re just a huge fucking asshole
I just hope for his ladys sake it wasn’t always like this and it’s an old age thing

>>33197395
Not enough information to know any of that, Its all too fucking weird, OP had a complaint about her so its weird to start with that with a mental competency thing but, where theres smoke there's fire, this isnt really normal, people who act like that are almost always retarded in some extremely conspicuous way, again not enough information, OP started off with a sensational post

>>33197395
>I just hope for his ladys sake it wasn’t always like this and it’s an old age thing
Her mom has been this way since forever according to my gf.

>>33195969 (OP)
I'm pretty sure there are tenant laws against what she's doing (forcing you to bed, not letting you open windows and so forth), but naturally, it depends where you live

>>33197553
>it depends where you live
Arizona.

>>33197558
I did a search and best I could find that would cover you is the Arizona Residential Landlord and Tenant Act (ARLTA).
The schedule thing could possibly fall under, "A landlord can’t “abuse the right to access or use it to harass the tenant" (A.R.S. § 33-1343)
Not allowing you to open windows is a grey area since they aren't explicitly mentioned, but if you can make the case that it's creating an unhealthy or unsafe living environment, then it'd be a violation of A.R.S. § 33-1324, which requires landlords to maintain a “fit and habitable” dwelling, which includes ensuring proper ventilation systems are in good working order.
That said, this is actually something you should talk to a lawyer about. However, pursuing legal action for tenant violations will probably make your situation worse in all honesty.

>>33197584
>tenant violations
*tenant law violations

>>33195969 (OP)
I won't read threads that suppose that the OP is in an actual prison when he isn't. I won't read obvious solution is obvious threads.

>>33198696
Autism.

OP here. I think it might be over for us. She seems too hesitant to leave, and wants to keep making her insane mom happy.

>>33201247
she was raised by her, her mom knows she has complete control over her. try counselling and see if it'll help you two get a better perspective

>>33195969 (OP)
If you truely need help anon, i'll arrange the gang from /pol/ to show up.

We can be there after driving non stop.

>>33197332
I just wanna point out that in a lot of places a will that excludes children is actually illegal and thus null. Many don't know and won't even attempt to contest, but you should ask actual legal advisor on that.
>>33197338
It's probably not about the will anyways, it just exhasterbates her mental issues. People have hard times saying no to their moms; they feel indebted and we just naturally crave their validation. When they get old moms frequently abuse this fact. Her mom is holding her emotionally hostage. This is a very complicated issue and it has claimed countless lives. She needs therapy. Would have been much easier if you could just faux kidnap her and disappear from mom's radars. I'm suggesting it because this way you can bypass her irrational guilt.

>>33202049
lol a bunch of chuds showing up to Arizona to try and unalive OP's MiL? This nigga serious?

>>33202138
>Would have been much easier if you could just faux kidnap her and disappear from mom's radars. I'm suggesting it because this way you can bypass her irrational guilt.
Her mom doesn't leave the house so I have no idea how we would even stage a runway or whatever.
>>33202049
lol this would be kind of funny.