been with girlfriend 5 years just starting to realise im not attracted to them anymore but still have romantic feelings not really sure where else to post this

>>33197536 (OP)
Did she get fat?

>>33197536 (OP)
First find out why you aren't attracted anymore. Is it you or her? Second reflect privately or talk with a close friend. Third, talk with your gf. It's clear you still care for her and it's important to communicate with your partner. Also, if it doesn't end up working out and you really cannot find her attractive, don't string her along. Break it off or you will both likely suffer.

>>33197536 (OP)
>girlfriend
>them
Are you losing attraction because she's mentally ill?

>>33197536 (OP)
>been with girlfriend 5 years
You should've proposed to marry three years ago, two at the least.


>just starting to realise im not attracted to them anymore
Yeah that happens with any single female you will ever date. 2 - 3 years go by, and you lose the infatuated honeymoon attraction phase.

>but still have romantic feelings not really sure where else to post this
Yeah you keep those. That's the real reason to be with anyone. That's also the reason why you should marry within the 2 - 3 years time range. Because if you don't, either (you) or the girl leaves if either of you are retarded enough to panic when that honeymoon phase ends. Marriage ensures that no-one does, since there's a binding vow to keep the ship sailing.

So what you thinking, boss? You gonna marry her already or are you gonna seriously consider wasting 5 years of your time and her time by leaving?

I mean you’re posting Chinese cartoon girls online so it seems pretty over to me desu

>>33197546
yeah definitely

>>33197780
what youre saying definitely makes sense i guess i need to ask myself is it too far gone to salvage for marriage material

>>33197559
its definitely me nothing has particularly changed from her side im kinda hesitant to speak to anyone i think i don't really want to admit it if i keep it in my head it doesn't feel real

>>33197536 (OP)
I don't understand this either. In my case, she's not my gf, but I was deeply infatuated or at least as infatuated as 9th grader could be anyway. I had to leave to study far away and then after three years I came back and suddenly I don't feel attracted to her any more. I look at old photo and I still feel the affection I used to have, but when I saw the real thing it's just like I met a completely different person...

>>33197780
>Marriage ensures that no-one does, since there's a binding vow to keep the ship sailing.

So what you're saying is marriage is just done to lock two people together instead of affirmation of love? Seriously? No wonder nobody marries anymore.

>>33199084
Locking in is an affirmation of love of itself. Immature people conflate love with attraction; love is a choice and can always be accessible. Attraction is fleeting and comes and goes and is driven by irrational factors that aren't chosen at all.

The alternative is to keep dating and keep breaking up on a repeated cycle and nauseum until you finally get the message that Mrs Perfect does not exist in real life

>>33199105
>conflate love with attraction
Love without attraction is just a lie some beaten up husband or wife keeps telling themselves that it's a form of love. It's not maturity, it's simply coping mechanism that isn't much different from stockholm syndrome because otherwise they'd have to acknowledge their marriage is done to a wrong person and their lives from then would be drier than a can of sardine.

Been with the same woman for many years. Dead bedroom for seven. Should I leave her? I do all the housework.