my bf (26) broke up with me (f23) a year ago, said i was never enough for him, and then ran off with my best friend. before the breakup he kept telling me how we're soulmates and will get married someday. stopped speaking to all of my friends because she's in all of our friend groups, so now im lonely and havent spoken to a single person in a long time (also NEET ontop of that). I still can't recover/move on and wanna kms everyday. also too scared to go to therapy bc dont want to look weak infront of my family and don't want to share anything with some random person that would know me irl.

why are guys like this, i didn't do anything to deserve this. he was my first partner ever, but i also wanted him to be my only partner. i dont want anyone else, and i can never see myself connecting with anyone else in the way that i connected with him, he's the only person whos ever been able to understand me. i can never be with anyone else because i knew my soulmate if that makes sense? like, another relationship will never be "genuine", and that would never be fair to the other person.

i keep spiraling more and more, and i know ill end up dead if i don't fix something soon, wtf do i do. fml.

>>33205936 (OP)
That sucks. Can't provide you a new boyfriend that will click with you, but you can surely talk with people who you don't have sex with?

You don't need to talk about relationships if you don't want to, it'll still be less lonely.

>>33205936 (OP)
I think the most unhealthy thing you can do right now is isolate yourself. You need friends, even if it's just family or siblings. I'm not saying you have to go out and be extroverted, just make sure you're talking to people every now and then. Otherwise you'll turn schizo and die

>>33205936 (OP)
>why are guys like this
don't blame me, I didn't do this

>i didn't do anything to deserve this. he was my first partner ever, but i also wanted him to be my only partner
yea that's the bonding instinct that makes most mainly stay with one partner, sorry to hear it didn't work out

> like, another relationship will never be "genuine", and that would never be fair to the other person
can someone who's love has unfortunately died rather than left never be "genuine" with someone else?

not sure that's it, leave that decision to the other person.

>>33205936 (OP)
>scared to go to therapy bc dont want to look weak infront of my family and don't want to share anything with some random person that would know me irl
All I can do is encourage you. I avoided therapy for years for similar reasons, didn't want to admit to myself that I have a problem that I can't just fix by myself if I get my shit together.
Also was worried my parents might think I'm weak (spoiler: them making me feel that way was part of the reason I needed therapy so badly)
It wasn't until my sister and a friend encouraged me several times and I want through an absolutely soul crushing breakup that I finally decided to go for it.
I know some rando on the internet won't convince you to finally give it a try, but I hope if you hear this from enough people you might actually do it.
>don't want to share anything with some random person that would know me irl
If you have a good therapist they will be able to ease you into it, especially if you can trust them enough to tell them that you're uncomfortable with this (they'll understand).
The fact that they are just a random person actually helped me to be very open with mine. Because for all intents and purposes my therapist doesn't "exist" outside of our sessions. I can trust them with my deepest secrets because they're just some random person. It's not much different from you telling us about your shit on here.
Anyways, godspeed nona, hope you can make it someday
>i dont want anyone else, i can never see myself connecting with anyone else in the way that i connected with him, he's the only person whos ever been able to understand me
very relatable feeling. I felt that with a girl I was friends with who rejected me when I wanted something more until I met my ex, felt that with my ex after we broke up, felt that with my second most recent friend until I met my most recent friend and now I feel the same with them. It's just impossible to imagine someone you haven't met yet, but eventually they still come along.

I know this is bad advice, but I just wanted to provide you some insight into my situation. The same thing happened to me, so I actually slept with his friend right after finding out and am planning to sleep with his other friends. He has very few. Actually, his old friendship imploded because his friend had hit up his this one girl behind his back, which is pretty hypocritical. Maybe he’ll explode when he finds out I did it or maybe not? Not sure!

Anyways I’m just sleeping with his friends. I really don’t give a fuck.

>>33205936 (OP)
Bitch you're 23, you still have time for at least 6 bfs and 2 broken marriages. God I hate young people complaining about their made up problems when there's still more than enough time on the clock, try being 28

>>33207526
Why are women so evil, imagine going out of your way to sever lifelong bonds because he loved someone else

>>33207526
>be woman
>get upset
>only recourse is to spread your legs
every time

>>33207560
So how am I the one that’s evil when he monkeybranched to my friend? Plus you don’t know the full story. I can deal with situations however I want.

>>33207590
lul cope

when it’s your girlfriend fucking your friend right after your breakup, all is fair game

>>33207593
>cope
Says the broad that got angry and decided the solution was to go on a cock sucking spree

>>33207598
lul newsflash retard, people can sleep with whomever after a breakup

>>33207600
Really sticking it to the man by letting him stick his dick in you

To OP: Be strong cause motherfuckers out here are ruthless and will fuck you up anyway you can to justify their own shitty behavior towards you. Don’t fall for it or the other people supporting them. Be your genuine beautiful self.

>>33207602
yikes still don’t understand how i’m in the wrong when i got fucked with

>>33207608
I couldn't care less who's in the wrong. It's just fucking hilarious that women's solution to everything is bending over.

>>33207611
aNd wHaT’s a MaN’s SoLuTioN

still not one word on the other party

>>33207613
I know i didn't take it up the ass last time someone slighted me, that's for sure.

>>33207613
man’s solution is bending someone over, a woman’s solution is bending over

your argument is redundant

>>33205936 (OP)
>guys
>1 guy

>>33207591
>So how am I the one that’s evil when he monkeybranched to my friend?
He fell for someone else than you, you call it monkeybranching when it could be just innocent affection. You sound evil and heartless
>Plus you don’t know the full story. I can deal with situations however I want.
You can but you're also evil, why can't you want others to be happy

>>33207637
you should get cucked and try to reason that having that done to you was really just out of an innocent affection lul

i am not evil, and again, and you don’t know the full story. everything after the breakup is fair game. sooner you get your head out of your ass you can understand how the world truly works

>>33207637
yes, he fell right into my friend’s pussy one week after our breakup, innocent affection indeed

>>33207772
Yeah, "everything is fair game" she says and then goes out of her way to destroy relationships kek. That's why I called you evil

>>33207774
He probably loves her but you're just doing it out of malice

>>33207788
Also way to go dehumanizing everyone else involved, your ex, your ex friend, totally not an evil thing to do

this is the first thread on 4chan that justifies getting cucked lmao

but the reasons you guys provided are actually really manipulatively good to use to garner acceptance of cheating

>>33207809
I'm not manipulator, I'm a burning romantic. Love is a struggle and anonette sounds like a midgame boss

>>33205936 (OP)
You're a girl. You can find a new man in minutes, literally just upload some pics to tinder or bumble or whatever and you'll have your pick off the litter

>>33205936 (OP)
Real shame. Your surrounded by male anons. PICK ONE.

Rolling. Location. Australia, Victoria.

>>33207593
>Your girlfriend
If she's so emotionally fragile to the point where she's cling onto any dude for support, she should've never been my gf in the first place, lmfao

>>33205936 (OP)
You're a woman, so you deserve this.

>>33205936 (OP)
>i knew my soulmate if that makes sense
It doesn't. Soulmates don't exist, no one is destined to magically love each other without putting work in the relationship.

>>33205936 (OP)
I felt bad for you at first but in your second paragraph you proved you're completely pathetic and retarded and don't deserve anything more than what you got.
Stop being a little bitch.

i dunno dude at least he broke up with you beforehand, he could have been cheating on you all this time. i think it's fair game.

>>33205936 (OP)
You got rid of two losers in your life, and they're stuck with each other. You win.

>>33207591
You seem controlling and were probably nagging him a lot.

Relationships come and go. You say all this crap about never wanting anyone else, but over time that would have changed anyways. Someone gets bored, or wants to see what else is out there, or fails to meet needs, or have them met. It's a constant renegotiation of what each party wants. He, for whatever reason, decided to move on to someone else. He's probably just thinking with his dick. Who can say. But don't hold this perspective that there was any guarantee of it lasting forever.

Once you process your grief and get over it, you will look back without such a rose tinted filter and probably think "God I was stupid for being this upset about him." But right now you just need to feel your shit and make steps to move on. Stop looking back so fondly. There must have been issues. Think of the problems and separate your fantasy from the reality. Start by identifying what the relationship lacked. When you were wronged. If you get angry don't act on it now. But you probably need to get mad so you can go through the process of grief to forgive and move on.

Again do not act on anger, but if you can look back on how you two ACTUALLY were with some reality based level of unsatisfaction, severing this oneitis bond you still have will become easier. It isn't you. It's not something to be ashamed of. Your friend probably isn't better than you in some way. You and him just weren't made to go the distance. So what. Learn and move on, that's life. And don't go back. Anyone who is willing to cut you off for someone else has shown the sacrifices they are willing to make, and it isn't FOR you, it IS you. He gave up what you two had. Do the same.

>>33208024
I love that someone literally put their hat in the pool to replace their ex and instantly got ghosted.

>>33205936 (OP)
You sound like me after my first breakup. Obviously you were not soulmates otherwise you would not have split up. This guy is not special and is definitely not the only person in the entire world who you can have a genuine connection with.
Some advice for next time. Part of the reason why you are so devastated right now is because you spent so much time on this person and it has all gone down the drain. That much is understandable. The other part, and something you can control, is that you need to have something else going on in your life besides your boyfriend. This is good and important for many reasons, but in this case having a purpose would give you some direction and you would know what to do with yourself without asking people on a Palestinian basket weaving forum
>>33207613
Go back to xitter

>>33205936 (OP)

>>33205936 (OP)
i'll be your loyal bf

>>33205936 (OP)
>said i was never enough for him
And he was right
Being sad about a breakup is one thing, but to spiral as much as you are?
You're beyond insane, any human whose like this for a partner is certified deranged

He dodged a bullet

>>33208024
Just saying, If your looking. Many of us are aswell. Although this assumes you really are 23F and not lying.

>>33207526
Your father must be so proud. Kidding, we all know you don't have a father

>>33205936 (OP)
You in Los Angeles baby girl? I can help you out