Anonymous
6/19/2025, 6:55:02 AM No.33242071
I have 3 years of actual job experience. I spent my life chasing small time jobs out of anxiety and feelings of inadequacy. I could never hold down a job before this one. I dropped out of uni thrice.
My neighborhood is now filled with objectively trashy people, and we are, now of all things, being outed as the weirdos. We constantly call out the neighbors' kids, pets, and shitty habits. I wish it was all in my head, but I know trashy when I see it, and I dont wanna keep hearing country music at 11:00pm. Our neighbors have a fucking pig farm in their parking space.
I would dedicate a good 10 years paying off the house, but I would have a good home to live in/get back to. I would be living with my mom, and would like it to be a big home so it will be a big loan. I really dont think she'll make it more years, and I dont want her to die in this place. Its suffocating to be surrounded by human filth. We cant even open our windows without the faint smell of dog poop creeping in.
The people I grew up with have either moved on, cut contact, become too distant/different, or have just gotten too old. It was my fault too for being who I am (distant).
Thing is, I really wanna shape my life up for success. I know Im near 30, and I will stick out in a group of dopey 19-20 yr old freshmen, but I dont think I will be anything if I keep trying to fix my life in such a half assed way. I clearly wont become capable of being an adult if I dont own up my future. I wanna go to college, and become a more capable person. I know how to navigate life a bit better instead of the younger, more depressed me. Time will move on anyway, and I know my mom would appreciate seeing me building a better future.
Should I buy a house, or should I go back to college and stay in this shit place for a while. Life WOULD be more bearable with a professional goal in mind, but living in shit is still shit.
My neighborhood is now filled with objectively trashy people, and we are, now of all things, being outed as the weirdos. We constantly call out the neighbors' kids, pets, and shitty habits. I wish it was all in my head, but I know trashy when I see it, and I dont wanna keep hearing country music at 11:00pm. Our neighbors have a fucking pig farm in their parking space.
I would dedicate a good 10 years paying off the house, but I would have a good home to live in/get back to. I would be living with my mom, and would like it to be a big home so it will be a big loan. I really dont think she'll make it more years, and I dont want her to die in this place. Its suffocating to be surrounded by human filth. We cant even open our windows without the faint smell of dog poop creeping in.
The people I grew up with have either moved on, cut contact, become too distant/different, or have just gotten too old. It was my fault too for being who I am (distant).
Thing is, I really wanna shape my life up for success. I know Im near 30, and I will stick out in a group of dopey 19-20 yr old freshmen, but I dont think I will be anything if I keep trying to fix my life in such a half assed way. I clearly wont become capable of being an adult if I dont own up my future. I wanna go to college, and become a more capable person. I know how to navigate life a bit better instead of the younger, more depressed me. Time will move on anyway, and I know my mom would appreciate seeing me building a better future.
Should I buy a house, or should I go back to college and stay in this shit place for a while. Life WOULD be more bearable with a professional goal in mind, but living in shit is still shit.
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